I feel useless as I can't work

DX'd - Other
41

Then maybe it’s time to figure out how to get your own place.

Maybe your parents will help you, financially, with this. Or maybe there’s some kind of subsidized housing. That would be a good project to work on. It has a goal, and that goal is independence.

Living alone forces you to get up and do things. I, personally, have a cat to take care of, and a house to take care of, and laundry to do, and I sometimes procrastinate, and I don’t do it all well, but I do it. I live alone, just 10 minutes from my parents, so I can see them any time I need to.

You say you can’t live alone, but you never tried. If you live alone, you have no choice but to do things and find ways to either not be lonely, or learn to love your own company.

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42

How about this:

Why don’t you learn how to cook? Or bake? Or both?

While you’re in bed, start Googling some recipes that sound interesting to you. Pick one to start, and then go shopping with your parents for the ingredients.

Then you will be contributing to the household, and you won’t feel as useless. You may even develop a love for a new hobby.

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43

When I was on lower dose meds I sometimes cooked simple stuff like pudding but my parents hated it and said I am trying to make them fat.

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44

So find some nice, healthy recipes. There’s TONS of food blogs on the internet.

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45

Also when I cooked my parents yelled at me for not cleaning the mess I do and the things I cooked with.

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46

Then clean up. You made the mess, you clean it up.

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47

Thinking about the past too much will probably just make you depressed. So just try to work on the present

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48

How do I forget the past?

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49

I practice self compassion. Also before I had baby qwertle I did lots of productive hobbies such as warhammer. That kept me from feeling useless.

I don’t have as much time now to do hobbies now qwertle is here but being a mother keeps me productive.

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50

You can’t forget it. But you don’t want to dwell on it so much.

Plus there’s good things in your past too.

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51

I don’t have patience and concentration for hobbies, thats my problem.

52

Its the good things in my past that are making me feel bad! I miss and want them!

53

Well maybe let that be a driver to try something new.

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54

You develop it over time.

I love to read, but I haven’t been able to read a book since earlier this year. But I wanted to read. So I bought a book I was really interested in, and I read one chapter. In my “old” life, I would have read half the book already, as I was a very fast reader. Now I have to accept one chapter. And I do! And I am really proud of myself!

That’s what you should shoot for – those little things. I promise you they will give you a sense of pride, and then you’ll want to keep going. Concentrate for as long as you can. Then stop. It’s even how I clean my house, with a lot of breaks. It’s how I do everything these days, with a lot of breaks.

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55

Or find a new way to do them.

I’m determined to find a way to do mine.

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56

I have the same issue. I can’t focus so I try to be patient while reading and doing stuff. Patience helps alot!

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57

This is a weak spot for me, too! I’m better at patience since being on my APs, though, because I don’t get as ragey when I don’t have patience for something.

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58

If you forget your past you can’t learn from it and you can’t use it to shape a better future.

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59

Yea I feel the same about wondering about this question. I can’t discipline myself to read a book for like several years now. I feel I don’t have the motivation although I do have the interest

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60

I’m curious if the same chemicals and pathways in the brain are used for discipline as motivation? I mean Mike Tyson had no motivation to wake up at 4 in the morning to jog 5 miles, but he had the discipline. Good question

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