Schizophrenia.com

How often do you have an episode?

I only ask because I’v read alot of topic’s here and it seems I suffer differently.

I had my first episode 4 years ago and it hasn’t stopped! Back then I embraced it because I couldn’t believe what I could see or hear, I found it amazing and for some reason I wasn’t affraid. It’s different now because I couldn’t care less about what they say to me (if I understand them) because what they say is as useful as dog poo.

Has anyone else had just 1 long episode?

I just read a great post here and it was about remembering- The person (I didn’t take note of his/her name) said that when he had an episode he didn’t remember- only flashes, Another said he remembers as clear as day (not quoted)

How often do you have an episode ? and how long would it last?
Also have you ever heard of anyone that had just one long episode. I’m really shocked and don’t know what to think…

After 4 years I’v learnt to live with it and yes it drives me mad! sometimes …But Im shocked because no-one seems to live with it daily/yearly

I’m egger to hear from people who have or know someone else that has had 1 long episode,

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I had one episode for almost a year It was hell living with that for a year. But it wasn’t my first one and probably will not be my last,. That was over 4 years ago. I haven’t hallucinated sense except that i still hear words here and there in my head but not on a continuous basis. Just every once in a while.

I got on the right med and it stopped. I was taking meds that whole time but for some reason they didn’t help. I then switched meds and it stopped.

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Looking back I got ill in 2009. I had delusions that my son or husband would kill me, that my boss was a satanist. At the end of 2010 I was put in psych hospital for almost 6 months. My mom forced them to release me and I went to live at her place. It took about 4 more months before the meds worked properly.

After that I have about two episodes/year. When the med stops working or needs to be increased. My pdoc has tried to lower the meds but I will start hearing intense voices in a couple of weeks.

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I’ve only been having regular episodes for a little over a year but my longest has probably been a month… I usually have an episode every 2 or 3 weeks and either have to get my meds adjusted or try to accommodate and let it pass without any incident. Without altering my meds it usually takes 2 or 3 weeks to get over my episode. It’s just way too tedious and taxing on my body to increase or switch my medications every 2 or 3 weeks. Otherwise, I only suffer delusions or hallucinations when I’m triggered, mainly by stress.

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My 16th and 17th year on this earth was just one long psychotic hallucination. Reality just seemed to be the brief view through the window into a world that I couldn’t get too. I was doing dangerous and really inappropriate stuff, always getting weird thoughts in my head. The voices were out of control and I was nearly always hallucinating, plus I was drinking a lot so I could get the voices to shut up. But then I felt too down from the alcohol so I’d take a lot of amphetamines to shake it off… I was a flipping mess.

I was consumed by paranoia about kidnappers. I was 17 and she was 6 and I was doing really weird stuff to my kid sister because I was sure kidnappers were after her. I would handcuff her to the belt loops of my jeans so a kidnapper couldn’t get her. I broke into a neighbors house during his little daughters slumber party because I was sure he was holding my kid sis hostage. She had a teacher who showed some interest in her art work so I took that as he was going to kidnap her so I would lock her in my room with me and never let her go to school. Mom and Dad would have to fight and threaten to chop down the door to make me let her out.

The episode that landed me in hospital was when I was 17 and I drove to her little school during lunch and just took her off the school playground and drove away with her. I was saving her from brain washing and reprogramming. I didn’t want the school to brain wash her or a teacher to molest her. The police got involved, I was chased, I really fell apart. I got taken in under restraints. Yep, my kid sis was there with me. It was all so very bad.

I was in hospital for such a long time. It took a long time to stabilize. Plus there was detox and rehab, and just getting back into my head so I could start to function. I thought the doctors where captors in this new world so I was always biting, kicking and screaming. I was sedated a lot. It took a long time to start to understand english again and function and be able to not act out.

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After reading that- I know already my reply will not do it justice. It sounds like you had it tough. From reading your other comments/topics it’s obivious how much you love your sister. Can you remember how it started, I mean… You didn’t just wake up one morning and have these thoughts?? It had to be a process of other things/thoughts fears?

I mean, A child can only learn to write when a pencil is introduced to his hand, then by guidence of a teacher or parent the child can learn to write. You can’t expect a child to learn to write (or even think of writing as a form of communtion) without been shown/introduced to it

The same goes for a fully grown man, He only knows what’s he’s educated in known. I can’t go over to NASA and apply for a job because I have no idea how spaceships work. I only know they fly.

My point is, Where you introduced to a kidnapping story when you where younger? on TV or over heard a conversation. I only say this because everything, every problem has a root, Everything starts somewhere.
I believe that when you find a root of a problem it can be then fixed.

Thank you so much for your comment!

There is a reason why I’m so freaked out about kidnappers. I am here in Seattle. Our family home. I don’t know if you know this but Seattle was the home of Ted Bundy, and Gary Ridgeway (Aka the green river killer)

Both were very brutal and graphic serial killers who are Seattle natives and they both cast a long shadow on the psyche of this city. Ted Bundy racked up 14+ known victims, his youngest being 8 years old.

Georgeann Hawkins was a good friend of my Aunts, a good UW student and victim number 8 or 9. It really upset my aunt and she never really got over it. I’ve met other people who know some of his victims. My kid sis’s law professor was a young intern on that trial. Bundy’s “touch” is still recent.

Ted Bundy was doing his crimes in the name of God. He was a devout almost zealous church goer and would hand out bibles at the Queen Anne Hill Store. All of his victims were women or girls and in his opinion they didn’t love god enough. My parents still live on Queen Anne hill.

I do understand that there is that foundation in my paranoia. I know that not everyone is Ted Bundy, But when I was growing up this was still a fresh issue in this city and my family. I have a feeling this is why I had the paranoia that I do.

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Wow, I had no idea, J. Knowing that history, I can completely see how you could have that fear. I would have probably reacted the same way!

It must be VERY tough to shake that feeling. Especially when a loved one, like your sis, is involved.

I have some very engrained paranoid themes too. Some will never go away–no matter how much therapy or medication is involved.

While they may be unshakeable, I hope you are able to find some peace with them.

Blessings,

Anthony

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@SurprisedJ I’ve heard of Ted Bundy, but never really knew a great deal. That must suck living in a city still haunted by his reputation.

My latest episode is ongoing. I had to leave work on sick leave, as I’m convinced the other doctors and nurses were plotting against me. They’re working for m15 and have cameras hidden in the mirrors.
Going back to work is out of the question, my pdoc says these are delusions. I haven’t told any of my family/friends about my psychotic symptoms.
This is my first psychotic flare up in 2 years. My pdoc is ramping up the antipsychotic to make me better. I’ll do anything not to feel like this.

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It is a dark spot in the Seattle history and my Aunt isn’t the only family in Seattle that was affected by one of these two men. Yes we also have Mary K Latureneo and Amanda Knox.
But Seattle isn’t all-bad. We’re the home city of Jimmy Hendrix, Alice in Chains, Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Soundgarden. Starbucks started here as well.
There is some good and bad in our history.

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Not sure how often episodes are since I don’t always notice them. I generally have at least one major break from reality each year. They are usually pretty short compared to the past because I can recognize the signs of a major break as it builds up now. Very short ones are a lot more frequent…sometimes I recognize them…sometimes not.

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I sort of use them now as a gauge. If I’m starting to sort of mentally glitch and I start worrying about kidnappers and acting out about kidnappers then I know I’m going to have a very hard time. It’s not like a normal little episode. If kidnappers are involved, it’s time for the J preservation team to gather a little closer.

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I get short ones much more frequently. It took therapy and lots of coping work shops but sometimes I’m able to calm down, talk down and just not get too worked up about some of the head circus antics. If I get really tired or stressed, then I know the voices will try and act up. A few weeks ago when my meds were being tampered with was the biggest one I’ve had in a long time.

By comparison, I don’t mind the small ones so much anymore.

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I have an episode every 2 or 3 weeks. I get really self-conscious. They last for around 2 or 3 hours.

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There’s always a root. I know Ted I done dome read up on him a few years ago. Living in a city with such history has got to be tough for any kid, I don’t live in America I’m from Ireland there is a huge difference but I’d say living in a place and been somewhat involved (I can only imagine the conversations around even your house) It would have a huge inpact on any child.

Atleast you have a cool story you can share with people lol :slight_smile:

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It sort of makes me think that some delusions and paranoia is regional. I’m not the only one in my SZ group who has a thing about going missing and meeting a murder. Seattle had a huge thing about “Stranger Danger” in schools and there were a lot of parents who used that name as sort of “the boogie man”

Washington state gets really freaked out about hitchhikers. Just do not hitch hike in washington state. Someone will call 911 if they see a hitchhiker.

Sometimes I think it’s a west coast thing. L.A. had Charlie Manson and Richard Ramirez (aka the Night stalker)
San Francisco bay area was home to Jim Jones for a while.
Northern California had the Zodiac killer
Pinkerton was just on the other side of the Canadian border.

It’s sad that I know this. I did too much reading up as a young man. It only sort of engrains my fears worse.

Bad episodes where me insight flips upside down only really happen if I get really stressed. Otherwise I feel like I’m always being watched/talked about and that my mind is being read by people or hidden cameras. What I really can’t shake is the thought that the world follows in my actions. Like before quadcopters were popular, I had the same idea to build one, then boom a few months later everyone is doing DIY quadcopters. This happens ALL the time and in itself should be proof that reality isn’t what it seems, but nobody else sees it that way.

Seeing bugs, movement or distortions is constant, bit usually gets more noticeable later in the day. Same for my hybrid hearing/receiving words from objects like fans or running water, though there are days when that is especially bad.

So basically I’m always manageably psychotic with the occasional loss of insight caused by extreme stress.

Oh, and not on needs, been med-free for almost a year.

I think having short or long episodes depends on what degree your in this illness, when I was so ill I don’t think I’ve ever got out of it, but I was almost normal at day (I felt like normal but I wasn’t) and living a real nightmare once the sun sets, I still have that since the relapse but a little less nonetheless it’s worsening with time, I get one every night at a certain time that lasts for 5 to 15 minutes but now it can last for hours during the night…and I do remember that when I had my worst year I was so psychotic that I lost my emotions, memory, communication skills with people, even my personality in that year…but suddenly after that year things had changed in my life and I started to get better and be like normal for years.

I have read a few books on Bundy. He’s the scariest type of serial killer really because he could switch personas so easily. I have read several places that his true victim count was far higher than what he admitted to.

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