I don’t fake anything.
I keep getting diagnosed with Schizoaffective.
This diagnosis sticks with you.
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I don’t have schizophrenia, I’ve got “psychotic depression” so maybe I’m not qualified to answer but I 100% understand where you’re coming from.
When I have my psychosis to the point where I need medical help, I always feel like it’s too much I have to be making it up for attention. There’s something in my head that tells me that. That I’m forcing it and I’m a terrible liar. Or I don’t really see anything I’m just dramatic. Insecurity sucks.
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Exactly what I feel man. It really sucks friend.
With 5+ hospitalizations, that’s commitment. I should win a Grammy! 
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Psychotic depression is usually used by a therapists counselor that doesn’t have the knowledge a psychiatrist has. Then it sticks. I was lucky to get to a doc that knew the difference between psychotic depression and schizoaffective.
I think it is paranoia plaguing you. You are I’ll and deserve good treatment for it. Screw the lies from Paranoia. Also- screw anyone who tries to make You feel like You are faking.
Please ignore my typos and random capitals. Just my phone and tired of going back to fix it today
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Can you explain? I’m still unsure if I believe it myself, the psychotic depression diagnosis I mean, and maybe its something else…?
Depression with psychotic features is often diagnosed before a schizoaffective dx because they are very similar. Be open and honest about every symptom to find out which you actually have. Hallucinations are a hallmark of sza and sz.
Okay, thank you
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