Why some of you dont believe, that i am schizophrenic?

Why do you believe it guys? I just had once a diagnosis of borderline, but I am not sure if they didn’t lie to me, cause not wanting to scare me… I am very suspicious right now(just have this in mind)… I am not sure, that here you easily get the diagnosis of schizophrenia…
But yes, I never had hallucinations nor voices. But I have this suspiciousness, dark thoughts, paranoia, low self esteem, social isolation cause too scared from the others. I guess I still interpratate lots of things as a danger, as a rejection too… I can also experience guilt, bounces of cruelty by fear or by lamentation of my past…
I didn’t sleep much this night and I think a lot. But still without the impression of a ‘‘good’’ thinking.
I also have my physical symptoms because of the illness. Once one doc told me, that I lack calm. Maybe in the end, its the paranoia which is consuming me like this? I guess sometimes I have this feeling to be a sinner, yeap… Doesn’t all this sound like a schizophrenia?
Sometimes I suffer so much in my head, that I lack breathing and I prefer to isolate then… I cant imagine a borderline is so heavy tbh…

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Oh yes, one more thing… Why you judge that I am not sz if the meds don’t help? Maybe I don’t respond to meds as many other schizophrenics, no? they are not a miracle, isn’t it?

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Who thinks you are faking it? I just think you are here for support like everyone else. :muscle::sunglasses::exploding_head:

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No, no… Its just, that I had the impression, that some of you think that I am not schizophrenic, cause I don’t get better even on meds…
And yes, I am still freaked out by this diagnosis. I am paranoid even from the fact of being a schizophrenic. I don’t know what to do to accept it better…

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I think you’re over thinking. It doesn’t matter what the diagnosis actually is. You just want support and to get better. No one thinks you’re faking it. We all had those thoughts.

A lot of times the meds just don’t work. They didn’t work for me for 6 years until I found Vraylar. I live in the USA so I usually get access to the newest meds.

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Oh, thanks @insidemind :slight_smile: . I seem as overthinking now? But yes, I was paranoid for years only by the word schizophrenia for me… Now I don’t feel fine and it still ‘‘explodes’’ my head… I guess I’ll still need more time to accept that I am sz :frowning: .people are hard on us I find. Even the docs were terrible with me, cause once I was verbally aggressive during one hospitalization… They gave me really bad ap s*** tbh then…
cool for the vraylar :slight_smile: Me I am more interested more in Latuda, which we don’t have here yet, cause it looks like my Zyprexa now… But it still feels that I am dying little by little on this Zyprexa tbh…

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A lot of folks like latuda. It didn’t work for me. You might like it when it comes available. In the meantime try to work to get better. Therapy, exercise, eating right, saving money, socializing, etc. I tried supplements that helped me. I get a lot of ■■■■ for them but they accelerated my healing process and changed me life for the better.

You are right some doctors are mean and jerks.

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You shouldn’t worry about the diagnosis, just concentrate on managing your symptoms.
I think symptom management is more important than the diagnosis.
After all if a symptom is ignored and not treated then the person will suffer.
No one should have to suffer.

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Is that your dx? If so, then that’s the dx. If it is a self diagnosis, then I’d be leery.

Well not sure if you have schizophrenia. But you certainly seem to have some kind of mental illness. Anna you dont sound well a lot of the time. I hope things get better for you.:butterfly::butterfly::butterfly::butterfly:

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Whatever the doctors have dx’d you with is probably what you have. Even if you aren’t SZ, borderline is a very serious mental illness as the suicide rate is the highest of all.

All that matters is you get the help you need to control your symptoms, whatever your DX may be.

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I had the diagnosis of borderline from one nice pdoc. He was swearing to my mom, that I am not schizophrenic… He said, that theres not good trt for borderlines, but that the good news is, that they get better with time, cause they gain in maturity and they eventually succeed to relativize theirs suffering… But all the pdocs after him said, that I have a psychosis and its probably sz. Idk who to believe.
In fact I try to work a lot now on myself, but I am afraid, that i’ll get scared and insecure about my strengths. I just hope this fear from the dark forces in me is in my past, how do you think? I was very scared to lose control of my mind in the past. Idk, maybe I should stop be scared, but will I succeed it?

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I was told at one time I manipulated the doctors to give me a diagnosis of aspergers and they were considering borderline personality disorder because of that.

But then I was told by several doctors I don’t have it…

I guess I just have sza. I dissociate a lot though. But it’s not transient, but constant and severe. It’s getting better over time.

Okay, Anna, I’ve explained this to you many times. I don’t think you’re faking anything. My worry is that your symptoms are not indicative of schizophrenia, and that in turn, you’re getting the wrong treatment, which is why you aren’t getting any better. You told me that you were diagnosed with “sluggish” schizophrenia. That’s not a thing. It was a fake diagnosis used in the Soviet Union and only the Soviet Union to discredit those who protested the cold war. This diagnosis wasn’t used or even accepted anywhere else in the world. From the Wikipedia page;

After being discharged from a hospital, persons diagnosed with sluggish schizophrenia were deprived of their civic rights, credibility and employability. The usage of this diagnosis has been internationally condemned.

So you see, I don’t think you are a fake, far from it. You seem to be very ill, but being ill does not mean that you have schizophrenia. I’m not a doctor, and I can’t disgnose you. All I can do is share my observations, and all I can think is that you’ll never get better like this because the treatment you’re getting is for an illness that you probably don’t have.

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I had this delusion I had schizotypal autism lol. Only the smartest people on the planet have it. Mainly in the Finnish area. I was deluded. It’s not a recognized condition though.

I doubted schizophrenia for a long time.

Ultimately it doesn’t matter what you have. That’s just a label. What you need to do is get treatment for what you are experiencing so you can function. If AP help you, then that’s awesome. Sometimes you have search for something that does treat your symptoms. So seriously I wouldn’t worry about what you have, all I want you to do is be healthy and have a functional life. Take care of yourself!

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Guys, you all say diagnosis doesn’t matter, which is true in some cases; sza versus bipolar 1 w/psychotic features, OCD versus GAD; but doctors make diagnoses to better treat a common set of symptoms. Hopping between two diagnoses of the same class is one thing, but jumping from a psychotic disorder to an anxiety disorder, for instance, changes things up because they’re not treated the same way. Antipsychotics are dangerous and wreak havoc on the body, but they are the lesser of two evils for psychotic disorders. However, if someone doesn’t have a psychotic disorder, the risk is too great to be on high doses of AP’s, especially considering they can worsen neuroses.

I swear, this is not me gatekeeping the diagnosis of schizophrenia. I’m concerned that being tied down to this diagnosis is preventing you, @Anna1, from getting proper treatment.

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Nobody feels that way @Anna1.

Even some doctors can think that, especially if it’s combined with them not liking you as a person.
In 2005 I said APs were only a partial help. A few weeks later my diagnosis had changed from schizoaffective mixed type to pd nos. I was taken off meds. What I hadn’t said , and what they were not competent enough to ask about, was whether I was taking meds consistently. I would have told them if asked I was doing so at most 50% of the time.

Forward 13 years and it’s back to saying schizophrenia.

No, no, circle… I never said, that I think, that you think, that I fake it. I know all of you here understand me and support me :slight_smile: . I was just asking if I look schizophrenic. But they give aps to the borderlines too. All docs seem to say though, that I have psychosis too. I think I do have paranoia… In fact, there are borderlines with psychotic features, this exists.
But yes, aps didn’t calm much my fears, but I think without them, its even worse. But I also wonder if they don’t worsen my state, but I guess I need them, idk…
In fact, I lowered a bit my Zyprexa to 7,5 mgs just to see. But maybe my fears are indicative of psychosis in the end, so I wont do it without aps, I don’t know…