Hi, has anyone else out there struggled with their diagnosis of schizophrenia? I find myself accepting, denying, then accepting, then denying all the time. I was diagnosed eleven years ago for the first time, and I accepted it back then but two years after that I didn’t accept it anymore. Then I went into remission, denied ever having sz, until my relapse 2012 when I thought it was Bipolar, and then when I was hospitalised in 2013 and they told me it was sz, I was shocked, and went into a rollercoaster of accepting and denying it. Sometimes up to this day I still wonder if they got it right, but I largely accept it, because I tell myself they are professional, they know what they are doing. I’ve heard that schizophrenics have a problem with insight into their illness, they have trouble knowing that they are sick, so I’m wondering if that’s also my problem…
It’s common to struggle. No one wants to think they can’t be in control of their mental health without help but everyone needs a little help now and then.
Back in 2002 , when i was still diagnosed with schizoaffective mixed type, a psychiatrist said i knew a lot about the illness but didn’t have much insight.
Three years later a new psychiatrist decided to change my diagnosis. Would my diagnosis have stayed the same if that pdoc hadn’t come along?
Although i accept i am prone to paranoia i find it hard to accept the paranoid PD diagnosis. I don’t feel i am anything like the very negative portrayals of those with it that get described in articles and information guides.
Generally speaking re being mentally ill, i fluctuate. Sometimes i believe it and others i get to thinking i’m just socially dysfunctional-a social misfit.
I try to accept my schizophrenia diagnosis, but later realise that I have no idea what to believe. The doctor seems to know a lot about how my mind works despite not even being able to read it or experience what I go through, but still prescribe medication that doesn’t always work. No one, not even doctors can prove that schizophrenia is truly a mental illness. I think there is a lot more to my mind than what society or doctors try to have me believe, as they do have big reasons to lie to me.
I struggle with psychiatry because the diagnosis is not usually cut and dry - Its a combination of symptoms that lead doctors to believe I have schizoaffective disorder. Not knowing the exact diagnosis is very common in psychiatry. Its like a guessing game.
Their conclusion, well he has schizophrenic symptoms and bipolar symptoms, so we shall diagnose him with schizoaffective disorder. I was given the bipolar diagnosis once, that stuck for a while, another doctor at first gave me the bipolar diagnosis then switched it over to schizoaffective, my first doctor gave me a schizophrenia diagnosis, my current doctor - schizoaffective disorder, no hesitation. Psychiatry is not an exact science -
Schizoaffective disorder makes the most sense for me, but these illnesses overlap many times.
My last therapist schizoaffective disorder, my current therapist - schizoaffective disorder.
I accept my diagnosis now
I struggled hard when I was first diagnosed. The label on my file seemed to keep on changing so why accept what might change tomorrow. Plus I used drugs to hide my SZ. So the hallucinations were from LSD, The paranoia was from pot, the racing thoughts were from Coke, and on and on I played until I ended up in detox and rehab and then had nothing to hid behind.
It’s a been a few years now that I have been stable and I have now come to accept the diagnosis.
Even if it changes again.
Yeah, I do. A Professor of Psychiatry diagnosed me as schizophrenic. I have to trust that he is an expert. But I often wonder if I’m something else, like schizoaffective, or something.
Sometimes I doubt that I have a serious problem - just thinking my only issues is hearing voices and the odd delusion. I am never unwell and appear perfectly normal so I wonder if I really do have schizophrenia.
Welcome to the forum @Patrisha_M
I always think there is nothing wrong with me until I have a episode. Then after a while the cycle repeates. Even hallucinations and voices don’t bother me. ‘its all fun n games till someone gets an eye poked out’ springs to mind
Right there. I’m right there on this one. As long as I don’t end up with a full case of Wax build-up (negative symptoms) then I can take the few voices left and that imaginary cat in the corner of my eye.
I was in total SHOCK (could hardly move!) after I was diagnosed as Bipolar, and then totally in SHOCK AGAIN when I started hearing voices too a few years later. After all, I had graduated from college with highest honors and earned a doctorate in law from a top law school, so I just COULDN’T be mentally ill! Lol.
I go through stages of thinking I’m normal and it’s the rest of the world that’s off.
I think that kind of thinking can be helpful in a way. I may want to copy you.
Does anyone else feel like the diagnosis came from nowhere? I mean I’ve been hospitalized and what not but it feels like there’s no reason I should have it. I’m a somewhat normal person most of the time. Besides the social piece I’m totally normal and I don’t think of myself as being schizo-effective. I do always take my pills though. But like nothing ever happened that should make me this way. I feel like I don’t have it even though I know I do.
I trust my doctor on that, because she was the one who got me on medication that actually helped, and she is always so kind to me.
my shrink says i am sz.
but i am an alien…from the planet sith in the delta belt…far, far away !?!
i accept and deny that i have any mental health issues quite often. its like being on a teeter totter all day
I figured my life was completely ■■■■■■ up beyond all repair when I was diagnosed. The evaluator told me that if I overcame it, I would become an incredible shrink. Here I am working on a thesis on stigma of mental illnesses. It’s hard work, I have to become an expert on discrimination and prejudice and also interventions for it. The professor wants me to be an expert on the concepts of discrimination and prejudice in general.
I thought to myself about what happens when schizophrenia is as under control as possible today. It’s bittersweet and tastes a little bit like blood.
I just can’t believe that I have come this far. I still have symptoms, the medication makes them mild instead of severe.
Insight makes it more manageable. I’m able to recognize my delusions and name them categorically, there are textbook terms for all types of delusions. I have a cluster of symptoms called Trumans Syndrome. It’s basically like I am in the Truman Show. The movie The Truman Show is terrifying. That’s me.
It would be a struggle for me to deny it.
I have accepted my diagnosis and have found a good combination of medication which had worked very well.I used to deny my diagnosis because I was not feeling very well and was depressed.After getting on a good combination of medication and accepting my diagnosis,I now try to work hard,on my work out,work and life in general but I still faces some social issue though,mainly anxiety and stress on meeting people.Beside these I live a good life overall.
I workout,I go to work,I take my medication and also I had interest in football and gaming…my life is fine and I accept my diagnosis and agree that I need to take meds and deal with the nasty side effect,I live like a person where you would bump in the street,even though I am a little weird but I am close to normal
Yes I struggle. I had my first psychotic episode in 2010. I used to have one pdoc that I’d see every few months. I’d try to explain to her there is something off with my mood. She’d brush it off because she believed I’d rather wanted to have bipolar. It was because I was in denial I have schiz. But I never denied the psychosis. I feel much better now that other docs have listened. I’m actually sza but tbh I strongly believe it’s bipolar.