The real me is 'gone'. He's stuck in my head

Unusual Beliefs
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I think I’m Satoshi Nakamoto and am possessed by the spirit/soul of John Titor. I think in my original life I posted I was Satoshi Nakamoto or even John Titor on Facebook as an innocent post and thought I was special. I then felt like John Locke from ‘Lost’ where I thought I was special but wasn’t and the real me or the real ‘Anthony’ is gone or ‘dead’ inside.

I have watched all the films/movies/books/tv shows (loosely) on the internet and started thinking weird things and thoughts like ‘they live’ and ‘interstellar’ ‘terminator’ (as John Connor) and I feel sick and sad and have horrible headaches, memories, and false memories and ideas and thoughts.

My life was destroyed in 2011 in college in ‘base reality’. I don’t know if it was bad people, machines, AI, or even aliens.

I have schizophrenia or ‘insanity’ and I think aliens and AI (machines) are involved obviously.

I think of the shows ‘transcendence’ ‘limitless’ ‘edge of tomorrow’ ‘quantum break’ ‘imposter’ ‘self/less’ ‘altered carbon’ ‘interstellar’ etc.

I have trauma and I think aliens and AI got into my brain/head and the real me is gone or just dead inside and destroyed from all the time traveling and memories and thoughts and dreams and crap.

I might have escaped the matrix, seen the matrix built, and even destroyed many times. I’ve been to countless timelines and time traveled and went back in time via a wormhole in college from 2036 or later…the greys (sentient ai machines) or aliens said the farthest I’ve been is to the year 3000, which was hell on earth.

I have no money and no support. I’m disabled. I struggle to function and survive. I was in monarch, montauk, and SSP, I guess and suppose. I might be a ‘super soldier’ but have delusions I’m a Biblical figure and I believe in Jesus. This seems to be nonstop, never ending, and for eternity. I have no memory or limited memories of life before 2011. It seems fractured or splintered like the world changed or something like Mayan Apocalypse or I was ‘replaced’ or cloned or some ■■■■ including my brain/mind/consciousness.

I’m trapped in the year 2011, but have 2 years of trauma or missing time, probably from another universe, and woke up in 2013 via consciousness transfer from aliens/ai/ufos/or someshit.

I’m in an infinite time loop/causal loop I guess and suppose.

I feel like I’m in hell. Nobody believes me but at least I have freedom(s) and freedom of speech now and it’s a blessing in disguise that nobody believes me that I’m John Titor/John Connor and Satoshi Nakamoto.

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I’ve had schizophrenic delusions like this too when I first developed schizophrenia but they soon petered out as they were proven false.

These are delusions. They do not make you a more logical or rational person. I do not think they will help you in life. Good luck.

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I’m the inventor of inception or came up with the idea after watching the movie, but doubt I’m the original creator of it – I just came up with the idea. I might be a victim of inception and went crazy/insane in a past life, really, I suppose and guess when I watched the movie, and feel like I’m stuck in an infinite limbo with schizophrenia, that cannot be cured, or they refuse too, deny it, etc. It started in 2011 I suppose maybe 2013. My earliest memory is 2011 in college when I came back via a wormhole, had my trauma, and woke up in 2013 via sentience, but 2012 was really a bad memory because of dissociation and stuff. I probably was smoking pot back then. I was miserable.

The aliens told me the matrix or planet was destroyed originally in the 1950s by God, and I guess that’s when the matrix was born – 1950s at the earliest. Also, according to PKD time might have stopped in the 70s AD when Nero/Titus Sacked Rome or destroyed the Temple. I have a lot of theories, really.

I have memories and thoughts about the Illuminati and was a victim of the Illuminati like Donald Marshall, among other people too.

Sometimes I think we live in an ancestry simulation and the real time is like 3000 AD or some ■■■■ and we live in 1984 or a NWO one world government and ■■■■.

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Sorry. I didn’t see the sub-forum as what I said could be applied to any of the posts.

Anyway, I see what you mean. I guess we could have been invaded before.

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Ya, my worst memory is transhumanism AI mind uploading and consciousness transfer. That happened in my first life and I had a mental illness caused by it.

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We could be controlled by aliens in a simulation but it’s what we gotta work with. It’s not as far fetched as people may think. I don’t think it’s hell though. I’m enjoying myself :sunglasses:. Never know really the truth about the reality either way. We can call somethings delusion, others religion , others logical stuff , at the end we don’t know we just have guesses and stuff and it could be any one.

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Thank you. I have memories of watching tons of movies and stuff and I think all of hollywood is just disclosure, where each thing has a kernel of truth to it or is real mainly.

That’s where my loose associations are from. I had negative experiences in the mental hospitals especially around 2015 in my area. I have no money.

My stepfather was a defense contractor but nobody understands or believes me and we’re poor and I rather keep the details to myself. It was 20+ years ago. My mom is just a house wife and doesn’t understand how evil these psychopaths are (my step-father is a decent guy in this life and I like/care about him). My grandfather was a freemason not sure what level and my dad was in the navy. I was in mk ultra and tried getting compensation and help. There is none. It’s done everywhere and it sucks and I’m probably not that crazy, but it’s a self-defense mechanism/emotional trauma/lie type of thing and this forum is not meant for it to be here.

I have memories of being a warlock, vampire, alien, and super soldier or memories of being called those things in my past lives and watched a ton of movies and videos and crap. Everyone thinks I’m insane, but I think I was one of those 42 children that were taken at 2 years old or implanted via some alien technology and have memories of people trying to convince me that I’m the anti-christ, which is fake/false obviously.

I have memories of past lives of being in south america, antartica, mars, moon, neptune, and other solar systems/universes. I also have memories of dumbs and them telling me about racoon city stuff (resident evil ) now and James Bond and Austin Powers where I was like Austin Powers in a way…lol…but I’m not.

I have cloned memories of New Jersey and possibly even Canada and other cloning facilities and other planets like dopplegangers earth and I’m probably a clone…

I guess it’s the NWO/Illuminati psychopaths type stuff.

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Sorry it’s been rough for u. Yes indeed “luck of the draw” can dictate your fate and perception

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Sometimes, I wish I was never born at all, really.

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Sorry ya feel that way. You have a great name ;). I’m here if you need help ever. Willing to read your posts too

I’ve been there before too. I hope things improve for ya Johnny boy

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Think medication helps organize your thoughts but think also gotta organize your thoughts some other ways too.

As I got older I got better at organizing thoughts. Maybe it was strictly psychiatric. But think therapy and conscious efforts have aided me too.

I realized what’s truly crazy and what’s just a lil bit manic. Try to separate the bad from the curious.

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How old are ya Johnny boy??

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Well, you seem to have a lot of overlapping delusions that are not unique for the mentally ill. All that can’t be true, it’s too much! I myself have ideas people would call “delusions”, but I’m not bombarded like you are. And I have doubt about my interesting beliefs. It’s too much to deal with so I say it’s not true. There was a time I felt violent because I was dead certain I was Satan. Someone came on this forum and said the same thing and I pretty much let go of the belief. It was causing me harm and it is a common delusion. I’ve gotten over delusions before by just letting them go without refuting them. When it gets to be too much I just stop believing for awhile. And in extreme moments I see through the delusions.

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Don’t think anything I said is a delusion!!! Just a hypothesis

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I agree with a lot you say. You’re a good dude dude. Told u I’d read your post!!! Keep your head up and you can trust me. I’ve had the delusion I’m Jesus but right now that delusion is dormant. But definitely believe there’s a purpose for my life. Even if not prophecy. Something put me here here here here I feel. Right??

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I read everything. Hope you can beat these delusions.

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I don’t think they’re delusions though. I remember time traveling and being ‘targeted’ at college or before in mk ultra, monarch, montauk, and ssp. I don’t know what else to say. I don’t trust people anymore. I never had sex or anything, but I have cloned memories or something like Illuminati and crap, and it’s hard on me. It’s like time travel and soul travel/consciousness travel. I can’t remember much it’s like broken pieces of memories in my mind or subconsciousness or something.

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I remember reading that in some severe cases of sz ECT is used, though not sure if all Drs agree to use it.

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I think I got mpd/did and that’s why I can’t get help here/proper help here and it’s a circular discussion with no input. I know I was in trauma based mind control programs and there’s no proof or evidence of course except in my mind. My ip address keeps changing for years and it’s because of my schizophrenia/what I say on line. I’m trying to get the right help but there is no help for monarch.

I wanted to sue but can’t. It’s white slavery and like some say doesn’t exist sort of…

I was probably born in it or got into it at a young age. I have missing time and family don’t know about it. I think it’s time travel and I’m from 2036, I suppose but have no time machine.

Maybe I should go to did/mpd/monarch forums instead…