Traditionally , in Indian culture , a girl moves out after marriage. I’m breaking that tradition I’m moving in with him next year. But I’d at least like to get engaged before we move in together. But he says that’s weird if we not living together. I’m upset and I don’t even know why. I’m being unreasonable maybe. I even offered to buy the ring myself.
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I guess there’s a lot of pressure coming from relatives and I’ve been with in 5 years and we not even engaged!
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Does he want to get married eventually?
Not everyone wants to get married these days.
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We both agree we want either a marriage or civil partnership.
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Family pressure can be the worst.
I wouldn’t let it guide you. It can lead to bad decisions.
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IMO - you’re also British. And are also culturally British / Western.
I was born in America and am American.
My mom is culturally Viet, but I’m not gonna live in America like a vietnamese.
I respect my culture in other ways, through food and art whatever.
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I’m being unreasonable but it’s getting me so down … It’s been 5 years already and we’re not going anywhere.
Also you’re right I am British , but because I grew up living with both my grandmother’s one of them always didn’t like my partner because we went holidays together.
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I don’t think you are being unreasonable. I don’t think it’s that weird to want to get married before living together. That’s how it was with my husband and I.
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he is not being very nice…of course he should get engaged if you are getting married…he may not wanna spring for the cost of the engagement ring as they are usually diamond rings…is he really going to marry you or what?
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I have the same question. And I’ve offered to get the ring.
if you dont like it just drop it.
It’s not that easy I still love him despite how much patience he has … It just winds me up.
Is he 100% moving in with you next year?
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Guess we gotta wait and see. 
Hmmm….
Are you feeling okay with him calling all the shots?
Don’t wanna add stress for you but are these things you can talk about without it turning into a fight?.
We have never had a fight yet but I’m just tired of him taking things so extremely slow.
That is good. 5 years without a fight great.
If you have trust in him. And he treats you well and loves you. And makes you happy in every other way. Then if this makes him happy to wait - i dunno - just let it go.
Don’t feel so down. You guys sound like its just circumstances/logistics keeping you apart.
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5 years without a fight sounds suspect to me. Unless it’s in our definitions of fight.
People disagree. If someone is always being submissive, then no fights occur.
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I get angry sometimes but he refuses to get angry back. He thinks going for a walk so we can later talk is better way to resolve things.