You won’t. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with the topic. It’s the judgemental people acting they’re better than us.
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Okay, I’ll refrain from discussing the matter any further. I don’t want to get your thread shut down. That said, I don’t think you said or did anything worthy of a suspension, and you’re definitely not a bad person. You’re okay. 
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There’s a book called you can heal your life by Louise hay .
Maybe that book and some therapy and professional help can help you.
I had voices that tortured me years ago but they never wanted me to kill.
They wanted me to kill self I think and that others were going to kill me.
I had paranoia and delusions about my pets but loved them anyway through it all.
I once called my sacred neigh ugly but I was talking to those who were in her body and told them to leave her body.
I wasn’t calling her that but those I thought were in her body.
I thought my dog was laughing at my suffering once so I put her in the bedroom and closed the door and said “you think that’s funny”(yelled) but then I cuddled her as always.
I always fed them and loved them more than I can say.
I have never been violent.
I am a ethical vegan so I try to avoid killing.
Admittedly I might kill cockroaches if they try take over my home but I don’t want to hurt anyone.
I want peace, love ,kindness and I want to be empathetic,compassionate,kind,caring and loving .
It’s not cool 
to murder which some people think it is .
Probably because of tv shows etc
I hope you will seek help.
Don’t hurt anyone!
Be kind to yourself and others.
Ask for help.
Wishing you peace and well.
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@Longhorn21 are you asking because you want to know if it’s ok to feel this way?
I can’t imagine this is a good place for you or anyone to put energy and thoughts.
Have you also had an suicidal thoughts? I’m only asking because it wasn’t mentioned.
I’m sorry for whatever pain you’ve endured honestly, but causing pain to others in the ways you described (not self defense not even revenge - just rage) isn’t healthy for anyone - zero benifit.
I think being open with your doctor may help you explore where these things come from.
You have the power to change it - why not use your rage against your rage, I doubt it’s served you well.
Also stay in exercise, helps to release the anger… maybe try one that doesn’t require hitting things to help the calm.
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I wholeheartedly agree! You need to tell your pdoc
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