So i spent a whole day in bed. Except getting out to eat and do other basic needs I’m laying, being numb and down. Perhaps I can’t move a lot because last night I took a number of benzos that could kill a horse but my already poisoned body can take it.
I’m just venting out. ( better now than before Christmas- I must think about that holiday tradition of ‘good feeling’, right?)
My friends, people from my past: they get married, they keep having babies, they improve their careers, they have hobbies, they are, basically, moving forward in whatever way. And I’m still here unless I go backwards, doing the same ■■■■ to shut down my mind and feelings that I’ve done before. Poor my child and everyone around me.
And sorry @Azley and @nomad for being unresponsive… I can’t do better at this time but I love you and care as ever.
Oh and @nomad I mailed that pic you made to minnii and she found it funny and laughed.
Perhaps I can’t move a lot because last night I took a number of benzos that could kill a horse
Please don’t get sucked back into benzo abuse.
I don’t have any for tonight…
I’ll try to not buy it this week at least
I’m sorry things are rough for you at the moment @Sarad.
I hope things improve for you soon. (((HUG)))
Has the seroquel been helping at all?
We all know you’re trying your best. That matters. I think it’s a great idea to go a week with no Benzos. After that, see how you feel and if you’re ready, try going another week.
i’m sorry you are feeling numb. i was feeling that way a few days ago. its hard to feel anything sometimes. i think you are trying and that’s what counts. i don’t take my benzo as often as i’m prescribed to, i’m suppose to take it twice a day but i don’t i feel sometimes i don’t need it.
I hope you feel better soon, @Sarad
stay strong. I know you’re a strong woman.
She’s not putting up cleavage pics all the time.
Sara is my friend. She’s not “doing” anything to me or anyone else. It’s all in your head, just like all the other stuff you babble about. Jeez.
Hang in there doll. You’ll be alright.
@Sarad. Sorry to hear you’re feeling so down. Do you think the holidays might be a contributing factor? It seems like the holidays can sometimes cause added stress and depression. I hope you feel better soon. Maybe go out with your son and do something fun with him. Take care.
There was a period of two or three years where I spent a lot of days in bed. It was total creature comfort and total psychological horror. I don’t want to sound like I am lecturing, but you could be headed towards something similar if your drug taking stays out of control. I’ve seen a lot of my friends get married and start families and become successful adults, but all that passed me by. Don’t ever think that things can’t get any worse because they always can. You could be headed towards worse times ahead. Try to find a way to spare yourself that kind of pain. Find things you like to do and enjoy doing them, besides taking drugs. Find things you like about life and accentuate those.
Sarad I have to agree with @crimby I think that abusing benzos could make things go in a negative direction for you. Also you were getting your degree right? That is something that is in the positive.
For the last year I think I spend 23 out of 24 hours in bed. Didn’t think about it much but I think it is bad.
I miss being out on my deck it wasn’t too long ago
Beautiful hearts forever Beth
And the men that love them
Ohhh thanks I try to share every day
I might be gone tomorrow