I had my emotions back. Now I dont have emotions other than anger.
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The fact that I had no negative symptoms while off meds proves they could make a med that fixes positive symptoms without worsening negative symptoms. Like normalizing dopamine in specific brain areas.
Psychosis is terrible, I am glad I got rid of it.
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Your lucky your getting the high spectrum of psychosis, I usually feel like ā ā ā ā like I got hit from a bulldozer
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The highs are met with the lows.
And Iām like aziz where I get violent impulses. Mainly my problems are with knives.
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Probably because with a psychosis you are constantly busy.
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Yes I was much more busy when psychotic. Little negative symptoms compared to now.
I enjoyed parts of my delusions. I will write about them.
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Delusions were the only thing that made me feel good at the start, as I thought I had a higher purpose than just the average personā¦ That quickly spiralled out of control, and then my head was so disorganised I had absolutely no idea what was going on.
It did not feel good to ask a man in a strange place where I was and what was going on to be told I was in the mental hospital and had been diagnosed with Schizophrenia.
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It feels special thatās why. Like something cool is happening. Until it goes downhill, if.
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Thanks for mentioning this. I was wondering why I felt so good and felt so grateful for my life because of how good I felt I suppose during the midst of psychosis. Now I donāt feel depressed but donāt feel particularly happy. Iām usually worried about things but am starting to feel better. Iām diagnosed schizoaffective, so maybe negative symptoms arenāt that pronounced in this disorder.
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It has ups and downs. I sometimes feel like Iām in a horror movie
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It does but its ups are better than the ups I get now on meds. The downs are worse during psychosis though as theyāre dangerous.
i dont have bipolar type or bipolar so I rarely if ever feel good or hypomanic unless I get a buzz from caffeine from energy drinks or smoke a cig. I have lost the ability to feel full pleasure from negatives. I have depressive type of sza so Iām always low functioning and depressed. My negatives were severe to the point of being a piece of lard.
I lost my brain acquity and intelligence and sharpness. I lost my ability to feel pleasure to itās core and itās purpose. Even self-stimulationā¦
I cannot work or do anything meaningful due to fear and paranoia. I donāt have agoraphobia.
Thereās nothing positive with psychosis except pain and misery and the affliction it brings to me and my family.
The only thing nice is I think Iām psychic but it doesnāt bring in meat or bread or water.
Itās probably a good thing like Cassandraās dilemma. I was never that good looking but God or the simulators gave me the gift of prophecy at a cost. I exposed their simulation and ended up schizophrenic. I even used to be a lower ranking computer simulator I guess.
They used to grant me wishes like a genie lol. I got 1 wish or so. Being smart. They compared me to Einstein, but Iāll probably end up poor and useless and a nobody like Nicola Teslaā¦
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I dont have depression but I know that depression also have negative symptoms just like sz so they both add up.
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I believe delusions are brand new, interesting and they challenge how the world really works.
Itās quite liberating to think youāre someone that you arenāt.
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Most of the psychosis Iāve been through was pretty bad, except for the religious stuff.
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I feel you man, I get hyper active during my psychosis. I had also grandeur delusions that gave me a lot of pleasure feeling āimportantā. I thought that I was a cia agent working undercover like I had two personalities - one awake and one when I fell asleep and started āsleep walkingā. I also thought that I was famous surgeon for some reason
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Mine sure as hell didnāt. Utterly terrifying.
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I thought that I was a scientist who knows the cure for all diseases, cancer, mental illnesses, intellectual disability, etc