I see. Well this guy was dressed provocatively and was with some girl who drove him there, no partner in sight, so I got my hopes up and Im stubborn as â â â â . Ive been with people who were in relationships before, I have some problems with realizing what is right and what is wrongâŚsex and foreplay feels right. Thats the bottom line for me. I do however avoid being a âhome-wreckerâ and breaking up people who are in serious relationships who live together. I keep it casual with them and dont let them get emotionally attached to me, I tell them that theyâre âtakenâ if they say they have feelings for me.
I dunno, I have some slight psychopathic traits, I dont really feel guilt easily. I more see my desires as priorities. If I see someone who looks appealing, my brain makes me talk to them and ask them for their phone number, unless they come off with a bitchy attitude or are obviously immature or just 18, those kids are too young, im almost 21 and I can tell you that each year after 18 means a world of difference in maturity.
I have outlets for my tendencies, powerlifting is great, go look in the creativity section to see videos of me training, that â â â â keeps me sane. Everyone there is there to get stronger and encourages me to get stronger. Thats a need for me. Its better than sex to lift 500lbs six times and just do â â â â and not hold back and show no mercy on myself, lift until I shart and then keep lifting.
But when I date people who are single, I am practically chivalric and courteous and respectful, I try to make a relationship instead of just sex buddies. But when I see someone alone sitting there looking adorable at a party, I just immediately talk to them and try to get their interest and phone number, or just go strait to hooking up.
Im mature in other ways than sexually, I was frustrated as a kid and teenager and confused at various times, now I am well experienced in sex but still feel like I am entitled to it. At least I know what I am doing, even if it is wrong. I just cant help but not care if itâs slightly amoral, if someone isnt married/engaged theyre fair game in my book.
And my hormones and testosterone are working overtime, I will be 21 on Wednesday and I am training like a mad man. Men are hard-wired to have sex with as many women as possible, and being bisexual also adds less masculine men to the picture, so I just cant help but want to have sex with really attractive people.
âŚI just cant help but to want to have sex with really attractive peopleâŚI think that makes sense given the other factors about me, the powerlifting and young age and slight psychopathic traits, my doctor says that I seek thrills and dont learn from mistakes as easily as other people but am not a true psychopath because true psychopaths never learn and never admit to faults and are constantly getting into serious trouble, committing crimes left and right. I just feel cool with someone cheating on their partner and seek intense activities like powerlifting today and martial arts when I was in high school.
I feel bad for your story about being cheated on, but psychosis is genetic and most people dont become psychotic from trauma, it requires a genetic disposition and sometimes a trigger. But yes, I do use caution with people who are in relationships, but I dont â â â â with married/engaged people, I just be polite to them and not pursue them at all. I do respect marriage.
I dunno, Im ranting at this point. I respect marriage and practically married people, but if they are down and I am down, it happens and I dont think twice. At least I am aware of it and can say âits slightly amoralâ but hey how many 19-22 year olds in college are gonna marry their boyfriend anyways?