What makes you most sad about this condition

This condition is kind of is slowly turning me into a physically weak person who can’t be enthusiastic and joyful as I was before
It makes me sad that I cannot be as close as I was to people who I used to be close to in the past. Very sad. I’m imprisoned from my prior connections to people.
Just because my enthusiasm for life is being sucked out slowly etc etc etc
Maybe it won’t be the same as last time last time I was on med I was so dead but alive it was crazy.

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I’m trying to focus on the positive, it’s given me a lot of perspective on life and has given me a better grasp on life outside of my head.

The sad thing is probably mourning who you could have been if you were healthy. I could have graduated law school and become a public defender with a nice apartment and a medium sized dog. Now I’m a special needs guy spending a few years recovering from a two year psychosis. I still see hope for recovery, this isn’t fatal and I’m learning to deal with it.

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It makes me sad to see others suffering through this illness. I’ve been fortunate, I found a good med to combat symptoms and I’m relatively stable. I’m able to work and earn enough to live comfortably. When I was hospitalized I saw too many others in situations worse off than I. This made me sad knowing they may never blossom into the individuals that they were supposed to become. It’s not pity, more an innate sadness.

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I’m trying to focus on the positive but the sad part truly makes me sad :frowning:

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Glad u found a good med that’s great

I try not to dwell on it but what makes me sad about the condition is that I feel like a waste of potential. Similar to what agent101 described. It also saddens me how different people view me now. Before I felt more appreciated. One more thing is that this young lady I was in love with completely broke ties with me partly due to my erratic behavior during the first years of the onset of my illness.

I too try to remain positive. If I dwell on it too much I get depressed. I’ve come to terms with my illness, knowing my life will never be normal again. I can’t go back to the past, the future sometimes seems bleak yet I try to remain hopeful. Who knows? This could be the year that I go back to school successfully.

Anyway, sorry to hear you’re going through a rough patch Butterflyy. Bad times seem like they last forever and good times seem too short but they will come again! Keep positive and know that you are a good person. Remind yourself of that. Sometimes I have to remind myself I am not a bad person. I’m pretty sure you aren’t a bad person.

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Lol I hope I’m not a bad person haha you are so funny
I want to be a good person lol

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Yea the potential of what could have or may have been in every respect…
Anyways you are right we don’t know the future

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I’m sorry about the person you were in love with that sounds quite heartbreaking to me.
She is obviously not the one for you though to remain with you if she cannot be with you at your worst or does not want to come back to you. You are worth more than that and I think you seem to be a great person :slight_smile:

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Yes, I tend to be one of those non intentionally funny people. It is because I’m a geek. I’ve been told I could be a stand up comedian. I doubt it though. Maybe it’s because of my expressions and delivery. Anyhow, I’m glad you found that funny. I like to make people smile.

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Thank you. She is married now and it is in the past. I’m over it, she’s “the one that got away”. It was really one of those relationships where we grew up together. She’s a very good person. Thanks again for the compliment. I try to be nice and respectful to everyone. Lol in my geeky dungeons and dragons character, I pledged an oath to be “Respectful to friend or foe alike.” with my paladin. But that is some hardcore nerd stuff.

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I’m sure you at least had a great relationship with her whilst it lasted.
And I don’t know dungeons and dragons probs I am the only one hehe. But I get your point

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Yeah it is a good memory. Dungeons and Dragons is a tabletop roleplaying game with a 12 sided die. Don’t worry that you don’t know about it. Back in the day people used to say it was a game for devil worshippers. Not really true. Now it is just viewed as a really nerdy game. It’s like Lord of the Rings but more nerdy. I think one of the mods also plays it with friends.

Anyway, glad you took your mind off of things that sadden you about our respective illnesses.

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Well missing the person I could have become. I had different plans that didn’t involve schizophrenia. Nothing I can do about it but it’s sad to not only see others have normal lives, but to know other people have this. It’s a very difficult illness. I try to think positive. With treatment it’s still there. It is embarrassing at gatherings when people ask what you do or ask other people what’s wrong with you. No one gets it but you guys. The saddest part is ignorance of the illness.

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I’m a completely different person now. I can barely remember the old me. I’m disabled now. I had a lot of potential before the illness.

The mental suffering was the worst followed by not having a career or job. I tried volunteering a few years ago but got paranoid and just stopped showing up. I feel ashamed.

I was stuck in my head for 5-6 years. It was hell. My delusions and paranoia suck too. I get depression and still get slightly dissociated.

My physical health has deteriorated and I look 10 years older now. I used to look quite young.

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The thing that makes me most sad about this disease is the lack of help you get if you’re really bad. Sometimes you can just be written off.

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What makes me sad is that I have a lack of pleasure and enjoyment. I don’t find interest in things like I used to. It makes life hard for me. Painting, video games, movies, love making… They’re just not the same anymore.
I’m also sad that I can’t trust my own brain. I constantly question myself. I have to constantly question my reality and if what I’m thinking or feeling is rational.
I also, also feel sad that I’ll probably be disabled enough one day that I can no longer work. I’m working, currently, but it is SO DIFFICULT sometimes. I wonder how I can keep doing it some days. If my condition continues to worsen over time, I’ll eventually have to stop working.

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Loss of being grounded in and being nourished by everyday living.

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I have changed so much due to this illness and it makes me sad. I have been hospitalized 7 times. I have gained 80lbs from antipsychotics. I have lost friends and jobs. I even lost close relationships with family after being psychotic in front of them. It’s been a nightmare. I am on disability and afraid to work because I am afraid to loose my disability. I don’t know what to do. I am 35 still at home with my mother. Both my sisters have long term boyfriends and live on their own and they are younger than me. I just feel hopeless and stuck.i use to be an artist and paint all the time. I don’t even have the motivation to paint anymore. I have just given up. I spend most days just sitting in my room looking at my cell phone on this forum and instagram and youtube. No life what so ever. I don’t think I will ever change. I just don’t have the will power and I am way too comfortable.

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Everything makes me sad about this disorder.
The lost years and lost potential.

Man I’m down today :disappointed:

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