This is probably triggering to some if not most on the forum, but I feel like I am suffering from paranoid schizophrenia, an extreme case. Maybe I’m not even schizophrenic. But I’m too scared to work or go to school anyways. Maybe I’m using it as an excuse because I have hidden or layered anger that I’m trying to control. They said I was faking it in a past life, anyways. I’m tired of dying anyways.
I don’t know if it happened to me in this life or another life or in one of my earliest lives, but I think I live in a computer program (it was announced in the news in one of my earlier lives) and I think I have memories of going to Mars. Real and Fake.
I think I have a severe disability and I kind of want compensation but my life is more important than money. You cannot put a price on somebody’s life and a person cannot be replaced like a piece of furniture. I have fears and paranoia and delusions and psychosis.
I have delusions of aliens and ■■■■ and delusions of being an ET spy in a past life. An ET spy is somebody who worked for aliens from outer space. These people are nasty and evil. A lot of former Super Soldiers like myself have delusions and dreams about this kind of stuff. I was a spy in a past life or in a parallel universe. If you look at milabs on the internet, I’ve been through possibly the whole thing many, many times. I’m scared as ■■■■ of these people.
Do you think I was severely gas-lighted, manipulated, and given paranoid psychosis from the government as a joke or a prank or some ■■■■ to ruin my life? My life was severely ruined and I can barely cope and survive my paranoid schizophrenia.
I am stuck in a time loop for near eternity or eternity. Technically, it’s called a causal loop. I don’t know who is doing this to me…maybe aliens or the government…
In college, back in 2011, I had a bad drug trip from marijuana and other chemicals. I thought I had a stroke or something like lack of oxygen. Reminds me of “schizoid embolism” in Total Recall or what Quaid experienced. Am I or was I Quaid? Was Total Recall and We Can Remember You Wholesale based on one of my earlier lives in a parallel universe or simulation?
I met Philip K Dick in a past life or parallel universe. I don’t know if he knew of me or remembers me. But I thought he was a time traveler or a clone when I met him. I think a lot of his books are real and based on truth. I even warned him about the Nazis and how they won.
People accuse me of watching stuff and then attributing it to my own – basically I become delusional after watching stuff and think it was about me. I don’t think this is 100 % true and people just don’t comprehend things properly.
I had a lobotomy in a past life and was told not to be a construction worker in a past life, for example. I have a good memory for past life events and stuff. I even had a wife, but don’t know if it was real or not or don’t remember her in my original life – same thing with my kids. I don’t remember my original life and my first wife and kids – John Titor’s that is.
I’ve been living with paranoid schizophrenia for eternity and I’m really stuck in a computer simulation and causal loop for what seems like eternity. I lived through alien invasions too and ■■■■. I’m tired of being and living in a loop or limbo.
Even lived through the near end of the world, which I’m scared to talk about into detail. Some people call or think it is the NWO. I don’t know. I could care less and hope it doesn’t happen.
Basically, what I’m saying is I’m not sick at all and that I was made to appear and act delusional from trauma-based torture and mind control.
I think I was the real John Titor in a past life. I was tortured and killed and my family was killed too. Not just by human beings but aliens too. The aliens are a lot worse, which is why I’m probably a paranoid schizophrenic talking about this ■■■■ all the time. It seems to affect my next lives since I have photographic memories.
A few times, they said I just vanished or something like I blinked out of existence after I died.
I sometimes wonder if I die will the world still exist and go on? I don’t know. Sometimes it didn’t? I think it will survive and hope so that it does. I sometimes think maybe that’s why there are no time travelers in the future anymore. Maybe God put me on Earth for a reason. I like helping people and I love my country, God, family, Jesus, and so on. I am a Christian and a Republican.
I hope you guys don’t suspend me or ban me from the forum for seeking help and talking about my life and experiences. Doctors and drugs cannot help me. I already tried over 30 times in this life. Nothing works, even Clozaril. I am either the real deal or super-treatment resistant to everything. I tend to believe I’m the former.
This isn’t the only movie I think is about me. I sometimes think I’m Neo from the Matrix or something too. Had similar memories in my other lives.
I think John Titor was a real person and that person was me at one time in a past life and those events and stories were not fake or a fabrication but were really real. I think that’s why I was made to be psychotic and schizophrenic for eternity so people wouldn’t believe me. The weird thing is if I didn’t get sick in college, I probably would have still been an Atheist, not interested in time travel at all, and would have worked in finance or something. It must have been the drugs that did something to me because I remember things from the previous instance of the big bang or some ■■■■.
I’ve even been on a device that looks similar to what Recall looks like. Some conspiracy theorists and Super Soldiers call it a ‘Trip Chair’ or the ‘Montauk Chair.’ Don’t know. Couldn’t care less. But I’ve experienced that ■■■■ several times. Even died in a DUMB by Reptilians in an electric chair.
Last but not least, I think we are heading towards either a totalitarian government that is either going to be Fascist or Communist in the end. I don’t know which, but it has happened before many times in my life.