I was seventeen been diagnosed a few months and I was convinced the devil would take over my body that night. I was in a mental institution, adolescent ward at a nice state run hospital when they still dished out money for them. The doctor sensed that I was in trouble and told the nurses to put me in the " pink room"( quiet room ) for the night. And I passed the night safely with a nice black male nurse sitting beside me. I realized years later it was just a delusion. I was scared s#@tless.
Are you sure it was a delusion? Sometimes reality and delusions can slip into each other.
I got guarded the first time they admitted me. There was a guy sitting in the room with me. Later they moved me to another room where they still kept me under guard, but this time the guard was sitting in a chair outside the door.
Anyways the worst delusion I had…maybe when the world turned into heaven and hell both at once. There was beautiful music from a street musician, but a foul disgustion sweet smell stinking up the streets everywhere I went…stuff like that. That lasted for a few days as I recall…part of my first episode.
Maybe the worst delusion I ever had was that my spirit was burning and I hallucinated a really bad smokey smell. I had my first hospitalization a few days later.
1234567890 typo mistake
Sorry, I think I misunderstood you. I thought that the guard was in your room was the delusion. I’m not so sharp today.
That the illuminati made me do a deal with the devil and implanted a chip on my head like with Amanda Bynes.
The very saddest thing that ever happened to me was I was walking in an airport listening to a piano tape cassette high on music like I had never been before. ( I was there for an incoming relative. )I turned the tape off on the way home. I thought to myself I’ll wait awhile to listen to it again. I waited too long. I heard a female voice saying over and over " listen to the music and we’ll be lovers". I kept saying " I’m waiting". Then after some months I turned the music back on and it caused me great pain. A woman won’t wait for you guys, take action now! That’s what I get for being so spiritual I was attached to nothing.
i don’t always like talking about some of my delusions because i still feel like i’m on thin ice with some of the delusions and talking about it makes it feel like i am strengthening it.
My first episode was the worst by far. I believe the voices in my head, were the government hacking My Mind by satellite
They were trying to drive me insane, and the whole world was in on it. The host of talk shows, the person sitting beside me at the diner… They were all in on the joke, and it was my life on the line
That was seriously f***** up
Mine was that I had no thoughts. It’s a cruel game between my voices and I. Il realise that I have some inserted thoughts then also the ones I think are my own will feel inserted.I nearly lost my mind, I try not to think too deeply about it, I’d get lost in madness.
I can relate @anon47167357 . We just have to keep our heads above water
Probably that I really did die over a million times and was tortured over a million times or billion times. I lost count. I thought it was the John Titor stuff really. Maybe it was reptilians greys or the Illuminati/Shadow Government/Deep State people or really bad people in general. Then I got delusions I invented bitcoin. I was talking about being a victim of mind control via monarch and montauk mainly. Mainly the suffering resembles that of Monarch torture a million times over. I wasn’t born into it I don’t think…I barely made it past 22-24 years old and now I’m here at 31 years old recovering from mind control and trauma and torture. I came back alive with no physical wounds and I feel like I watched civilization end a few times or too many times…
I don’t think I’m a bloodliner or a ‘chosen one’ because as Cathy O’Brien stated I ‘got thrown off the freedom train’ one too many times – perhaps billions.
I found Jesus Christ. I joined the Illuminati in my dreams or past life and even aliens were involved and I sold my soul and all that not knowing anything. Christians call them demons and I might be a physically weak super soldier with high IQ and psychic abilities and quasi-immortality abilities like coming back from the dead and reseting time.
I thought it was mind uploading and consciousness transfer into a new body for near eternity via transhumanism experiments.
I worry about my family but they say it’s not real and I don’t trust the web or people in general…
I thought it all started in a past life or another dimension in college and that I got targeted at the mental hospital. Basically mk - ultra…
I really don’t know what my worst delusion was. I’ve had so many.
I dont have a worse delusion, they were all dangerous.
Id like to choose one but most of the time I was delusional my thoughts weren’t understandable like cops are transformational adept ignorance ability force of rationalistic legalese temperature volatility
If thats what i was thinking i would have thought that was a bang on description seeing an essence of the world that nobody else could
when I believed I didn’t have a body but was a laser on a dvd player that had the devil trapped inside…we were on the way to fire lake.
That the devil had taken half my soul and would be back for the rest if I ever thought of him, except if I afterwards thought (or said) “I do not welcome the devil into my body. He may not have my soul.”
My worst one is unspeakable. But it did involve another layer of reality that people couldn’t perceive, and something very, very evil. Luckily zero delusions anymore.
I had a horrible delusion the cia and fbi were trying to kill me. I was completely manic and went to Vegas during the height of the pandemic. I got a nice hotel gambled a bit then freaked out I didn’t even stay in my hotel. I started walking to the airport then took and Uber got a flight back and slept in the busiest airport terminal. It was horrible I hope it never gets that bad again. At least I won some money and that paid for my flight.
I feel for you.
I’d say that one delusion, or a series of delusions that stood out was that the Illuminati sent reptilians to spy on me. My former employer also spied on me and tried to destroy my mind and body. They could read my mind and send messages through the TV and the internet. On one of the worst days of my life, I was depressed, and these dark beings and some of my managers had some kind of court shrouded in darkness. The voices told me every insult in the book and said I should kill myself. It was so bad, I had to be hospitalized.