Psychosis is paradoxically the best and worst experience I’ve ever had. It’s thrilling to feel that special. I’ve never been bored when psychotic. It was also a horrible experience. I was on the streets and feared for my life. I’ve also almost ended up in prison too.
It’s just when I feel suicidal and a lot of other times I wish I was in psychosis. Being normal is just so mundane and boring.
Does anyone else feel this way?
I think it’s possible to glamourise the past. I’ve been psychotic out of hospital and that was a scary experience that I don’t want to repeat. I’m lucky to be alive actually.
The only part of being psychotic I enjoyed was when my voice sounded amazing when I sang. My voice sounded deep and smooth and the falsetto was angelic. All in my head of course.
@StonePaperScissors I had the improved singing too!
Haha. It’s nice until you realize you were hurting everyones ears lol.
Im psychotic but ive been drinking heavily lately. At night, around 8 or 9, i start getting worried my father whom i live with will murder me in my sleep. Psychosis isnt boring, but its very isolating. No fun in my experience.
Which is all to say i agree with you in many ways.
That’s terrible. Why would you think your father wants to murder you? Can you block the feeling/delusion?
not really. It usually only lasts until 12-2 am, so i still get a full nights sleep fortunately.
Itll pass 
started abilify 5 weeks ago, few more and ill be ok again 
I know how you feel @Tyme. My psychosis was grand. I was the most important person in the world. But it was also terrifying. I was the subject of surveillance by the government and by otherworldly agents. My voices would say they loved me, then in the same breath tell me to kill myself. Still, in the back of my mind and wonder whether I’m supposed to be dead, whether the universe will right this wrong against my will. I think what’s going on here is that you remember the grandeur and not the terror. Psychosis is dangerous. Very dangerous. We would be best to let go of our past psychoses, move on. It never really is that simple though, is it? 
its possibly just an overdose of dopamine. keeps ya busy with getting better and with some real changes. i hate it though. now i have an element of control or two, its better than out of control. but out of control you can stay within limits not of your own making.
I don’t think that psychosis is all that great. Lots of bad experiences and hallucinations during it. Can’t think of a single thing to romanticize about it. Sure, we are all different due to our schizophrenia but I rarely enjoy it. I’ve had a few religious experiences that were nice but that’s about it.
I miss how I lose my appetite on psychosis and how I get made to feel special initially. But that’s about it and I wouldn’t in a squillion years go back to it if I could choose.
My first episode was blissful.
I will never forget it. It was the first time I heard goddess Annette and her voice was pure rapture.
I wrote a love letter to her asking her to marry me. I wrote poems for her on reddit, glorifying her
I was never really fond of psychosis. It made tying my shoelaces last too long.
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