I think I may have done a thread on this before but I can’t remember?
Anyway, I had a bad day today. I got wrapped up talking to my ‘audience’ and did it all day long. I simply talk as if I am making a YouTube video or something. I believe that the whole world is watching me and that there are cameras everywhere so I just talk to my audience. I talk about my life and about how I think life and the world should be. Occassionally, I will respond to or talk to the brain researchers communicating with my brain but I assume that my audience is privy to that as well. Thank fake God that I never talk to myself in public. I am very mindful of having to follow the customs and rules of society when I am at school or out and about. I am hoping tomorrow will be better and I can get lost in my homework or something. Today was a waste of time. I got very animated reliving past hurts and giving opinions. F**king Crazy lady up in here!!!
Do you talk to yourself? What do you say? Who are you talking to?
Let me check the Panasonic one more time from this angle…yup, it sure looks like one. ok keep the lights off.
Say, when did y’all come aboard the crazy train? Nice of you to pretend to be one. Ever wonder what happens when you reveal your mark’s behavior too detailed and think it goes unnoticed.
Sorry, corrupt data makes no grants available. sad as the wallet empties and tempers short out, with nothing on the horizon to fatten the kitty, the locks rusted out, the gate loosens and the monsters fall out into the nothingness of zero my hero takes the jeep for a ride.
Nutballs back in the freezer the holidays are over and we never thought the bonfires would reach the top of the eves.
Do hermano’s move in because they protect unwittingly the process of the name that sits molding in the pencil cup of need.
What about the vampire dinner? was it all a dream? Why’d yall have such beautiful gowns with the velvet gloves and the tux’s with the flawless seams, not to mention the china plates with gold trim, the goblets with gold stems, the flatware of pure gold, why, why, why all the Ooo La La, if one wasn’t supposed to look? was it necessary to all stop and turn to look at me just barely peeking through the slats of the blinds? Why all the cameras in the rooms if I could see your monitors with me on them jumping up and down?
Remember the giant orange fly eye’d bugs trying hard to stand still in the neighbors yard? Same yard with the palm tree that says hello to me as it rolled up then back from the fence? The fat bald guy that leaped into the bushes when I did an about face- forward march so unexpectedly? The super brights driving in packs of two that seeked me out from under the overpass as I tried to stay dry in the rain that entire night? Straight, half turn left, quarter right, then the plain white semi’s that blinked their lights to signal the start of the return.
Wait, was that an…explosion in the front of the house that made the entire structure lurch crookedy and settle down to that eyeball peeking in the lower left hand corner of the front door?
Blue finder lights seeping into the walls, bouncing around the white dots, mixing with red and green laser like beams that turn off and on?
The smoke detecter red laser light that shone out into a straight line, scanning the room until it found me>
Did you even want the lyrics of that sweet asian sounding song sung softly in perfect pitch for 4 hours straight, good luck, so do I.
Tiny samples of the voices from the ‘A’ side, ‘B’ side and damn if you can see in the flir dark side of the house I live in, and this my friends, is what I have to consider normal because you can’t get enough of whatever it is you think your getting from me.
When I’m alone, and sometimes when I’m out of earshot of my partner, i do what you do and talk to people who aren’t there. Usually I have conversations with people I know or friends I don’t have.
I talk to myself in public too, usually soothing things. A lot of people do it so I don’t feel too strange doing it.
I sometimes talk to myself but not in public.
I’m not talking to an audience just myself.
I don’t do it all the time.
I had a better day today. I was able to get away from (ignore) my audience long enough to do a few hours of homework. Phew! My audience is ever-present though. Day and night, asleep and awake, everywhere I go. They are part of my life.
Perhaps in time, they will go away. I know that delusions can fade over time.
So do the neighbors, we just lost another one today.
Seems the phase cycle is getting shorter each year. What will we get in return.