As I come out of a withdrawl, I realize that people can be either helpful or destructive and the funny thing is that the destructive ones seem to live just as long as the helpful ones, if not longer. Because having a heart makes us vulnerable. We have to be there for the ones we care about and learn to dismiss the ones who obviously don’t care about us.
wow, Right there with you on that.
Very nicely put.
Well said. It’s one of the hardest things to do if the negative ppl are family. But it can be done. I have cut out negative ppl from my life and it wasn’t easy. But I feel very much better without them. One of them is my father.
Also I learned I chose who I want to be friends with. It takes time to build a friendship for me. I don’t trust ppl. But in 20 years I have found 4 good friends I can count on.
I’m going through the back and fourth of cutting out a brother. He’s not supportive at all and does some really horrid stuff… So I should shut that door.
But he’s a train wreck in the making. Even I can see his life is unraveling quite fast. So maybe his nastiness is motivated by illness and not ill wishes… So I should maybe keep that door open.
My sis says, shut the door and help him if he asks for help after the crash that we can all see is just days away really.
the problem is the nastiness has the same result whether it’s intentional or not. It might be stronger to quietly reject your brother at this time. There were times when I only learned from being rejected.
i always found it difficult to cut people out of my life but not anymore. since i’ve cut one person loose, i’m more than willing to do it again if needs be. it’s a horrible thing to have to go through but sometimes u just have to terminate toxic relationships for ur own good.