Schizophrenic Guys: Once your dating "love interest" knows your are schizophrenic, say good-bye

I know what I have stated doesn’t apply to all “normal” women we are interested in but I have personally experienced the “cold shoulder” from women who know that you are schizophrenic. It’s a terrible feeling. Just chatting like normal and all of a sudden she chats less towards you even to the point where she calls you “crazy” and then stops.

The chatting was great at the beginning but when she starts doing her “research” on you or “gossips” about you with other women who have “dirt” or the “goods” on you. You can tell the chatting just dramatically changes.

It’s not fair but then life is not fair with this disease we live with anyways.

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It’s baggage and some people don’t want that

As you get older I think it works both ways

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This is one of the reasons why I think it’s better to just disclose the diagnosis early on for most if not all of us. They are likely to find out anyway. I don’t see the point of wasting your time if it’s going to be a sticking point.

Some us may be able to hide it indefinitely but I think those are in the minority. I would always disclose it anyway personally, even if I had the ability to hide.

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How does this “baggage” work both way? Elaborate…

Well you might date a woman in her 30’s or 40’s that already has kids.

They might have their own health problems

Financial differences

Could be anything, but we all have baggage to contend with

Schizophrenia does not get a good press, so it’s a tough pill for someone who knows little to make an informed judgement

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That’s a great piece of advice. I will disclose immediately my schizophrenia from now on to women I’m interested in just to get this secret out of the way. The time, money and effort wasted just is not worth it anymore.

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I can’t even get people interested enough to hold much of a conversation

Last person I spoke to on an app asked me my music tastes and I got unmatched

WTF

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Well, this woman is 34 with no kids and no health problems that I am aware of. She is financially secure and well educated. I agree. Schizophrenia receives bad press.

If this is the way you want to go, this is fine. I personally maybe would give them a brief amount of time to get to know me first before disclosing. It doesn’t necessarily have to be the first thing that they know about you. But, I would, like I said, get it out of the way early.

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HAHAHA. Sorry to laugh. Music is one thing but there are other aspects about anyone’s life that can be compared and contrasted. Not just our music aspect.

What’s the point of giving her a brief amount of time when we as schizophrenic guys know she is going to head for the exit once the words “mentally unstable” or “crazy” or “psychotic” comes out of a schizophrenic guys mouth? Perhaps it is just me and my experience with this woman. I don’t know. It just sucks being me right now.

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Like I said. I think disclosing it right away is fine too, if you so choose.

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I dont think thats true at all. I think a lot of people are actually intrigued by that part of my persinality. I think of schizophrnia kind of as an intuitive mind gone haywire to where we intuit things that arent true. But this quality we possess makes us unique and i think people like that. I l think were all in the same boat. Were all valuable and interesting to non schizophrnics.

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Perhaps your fortune with women is more prospective than my own. So I assume none of the women who you have had discussions with have called you “crazy” or you, yourself have never stated you were “crazy” to them?

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Lol idk i wouldnt say im crazy as i think its a bit negative or derogatory of a word. I would just say i have a brain disease or a mental illness.

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Okay, how’s this. Do you believe that 1 to 3 women of whom know you would “gossip” about you behind your back and discuss whatever “goods” they have on you? And when I refer to “goods” I mean your schizophrenia.

I mean if a woman told me she had parkinsons i would not dump her, its the same for us…i know what you mean thought. There is a stigma but i think it’s improtant we help dispell those mistruths. I think scizophrnic voices can lower our self confidence sometimes…but i think we should be proud of who we are.

Sometimes people will put us down but it doesnt change the fact thay were important and special, and good women/men will see that. Any one who is ignorant of that perhaps you could inform them about what schizophrnia really is qnd help them get past the stigma

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Well, the stigma is somewhat true for the minority of those who have schizophrenia where we act crazy when in a psychotic state. I agree that schizophrenia does lower self-confidence in one’s self since this disease does hinder a person’s ability to have a “normal” life. Schizophrenia is not a disease to be proud of my friend. Those health professionals who know what schizophrenia is such as psychiatrists and psychiatric nurses feel sorry for us in what we go through. We don’t really know what we go through until our actions or past events have been reflected upon.

We are not important or special as majority of schizophrenics do think of this delusion of grandeur. If schizophrenics can be seen for their kind actions and behavior then perhaps good men/women will see that. Informing those around us about what schizophrenia is is a good idea actually. I might try doing that.

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It’s a great attitude to have that you are special, but I don’t think that that changes the stigma attached to SZ.

I remember that my mom and dad had a schizophrenic friend before I was diagnosed. He was a little strange and said some bizarre things, including some violent things. I remember my mom telling me once that he said something to the effect of “I could kill you with my hands”. Anyway, I always thought he had the potential to flip and hurt people because of his schizophrenia. Even me, someone destined to get schizophrenia remembers what my view of schizophrenics used to be prior to being diagnosed. And it was not a positive one. It was one of potential violence. Not everyone has these views. Like I said, my parents were friends with a sz as an example, but a great many do.

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I should say that the image of schizophrenia has probably progressed in a more positive direction since I held those views on that particular individual though.

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