I realize I am far too stressed out recently.
Monday and Tuesday, I had no energy and postponed most work.
Wednesday Thursday was better but I lost a client.
Today I lost another client. I had designed everything and even prepared to email it to her and i thought I did, then at night I got an email, she was angry and wanted to cancel. I guess I forgot to email the files to her.
Not sure how though
Sometimes simple things are too much for me. I am tired.
Then visiting friends at night, they are leaving on a road trip to USA tomorrow and asked us to join. I wanted to go and mr x did not. It got ugly and we had a huge fight afterwards.
I am not sure what I am missing. I don’t get it. What am I doing other than my best? I am exhausted emotionally and so tired of this mental illness. We had a fight about almost everything. He is never satisfied I guess. I treat him like a king, honestly. I don’t know what I am missing.
I cook, clean, do almost most of the housework. Participate in almost all expenses. Buy gifts, plan surprises. Plan parties and trips. I booked vacation twice as a surprise. What am I missing? He is tired all the time, does not want to do much. Can not lose weight, it has been a long time. He has a stressful job I get it. Then he said I am comparing him to other men, not sure what that means. Something is off and I can not decide what it is.
He is tired of my MI too, it is not easy, I get it. But I am already doing so much
Even my psychiatrist asked if my relationship is okay and even mentioned that he is too critical of me. Not sure what that meant. This is making me miserable.
I wish I could give you a good advice but relationships dynamics is not my forte…
My longest one was 2.5 years and it ended badly, I couldn’t save it.
I guess I always chose the wrong girls… but whenever I felt more right about a girl, either she was married or she didn’t like me.
That was just my luck in life so far, I guess…
I think you should prioritize you mental health. Then, if he is dissatisfied with your efforts, maybe he is not the right guy for you. You don’t have to feel miserable in a relationship, the purpose is to feel more complete having a partner by your side.
you said you treat him like a king, does he treat you like a queen? If not maybe you are not with the right man or you should stop treating him like a king. Maybe he doesn’t value being treated like royalty. Let him do his own stuff. He should help 50/50 with house cleaning, shopping, laundry, dishes and paying the bills. He should cook half the meals. And definitely take out the trash and scrub the toilet. Some men don’t understand the value of all the work you do because they have never had to do any of it for themselves. Some men go straight from their mother’s care to their wife’s care. I would never be comfortable in that kind of relationship.
@anon96671092 He has a senior position and his own team of people in an IT company. It is very stressful
But he works at least 8 hours a day - 5 days a week.
@Andrey If I think like that, no relationship will be good for me. I mean there is no perfect situation, so I persevere and make the most of what I got …
@tera yeah he does good things sometimes. I don’t let him clean, because he does not know how. I don’t mind doing it, I just wish certain things were different. I mean he is not a woman in the end, so my expectations should be different. I just feel like we are not ‘getting’ each other. Like understanding each other and my MI is making things worse.
Maybe you could find certain odd jobs for him that are a pain to you but don’t take that much skill and effort - like taking out the trash, sweeping the front porch, maybe doing the dishes. He is working full time, so that is a lot of stress on his shoulders. Don’t nag too much, but you might have to be assertive.
