Reasons why you isolate/don't socially engage

  1. Paranoia/social anxiety A fear of making a fool of myself and a feeling that others will be hostile,mocking and unfriendly.

  2. Socially engaging is mentally exhausting/stressful. The unwritten laws of social engagement don’t come naturally to me.

  3. Ties in quite a lot with 2- lack of motivation .

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i relate… im often overcome feeling tired and procrastinate the outings

I think reasons numbers 2 and 3 would suit why I don’t readily engage socially.

Why is it for you @firemonkey?

For me its 1,2, and 3

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Ditto for me … all of the above

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Trouble relating to people.

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For me it’s really numbers 2 and 3

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this is really eye opening for me. =^o^= you don’t really have to do anything you don’t feel though, nothing wrong with that. :v:

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All the ones stated in my first post but especially 1 and 2. Also there’s the issue of how I live not being readily conducive to accommodating visitors. I am very set in my ways which are not really suited to entertaining company.
Then there is the whole issue of making conversation which is a corner stone of social engagement.

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For me I think it’s number 3. I need to hang out more with the friends I do have but I’ve just been coming up with excuses to make plans with them. Usually they’ll be the first to make plans but they rarely do anyway. I keep in touch with my one friend that I met in the hospital on a daily basis since we relate a lot but I lack motivation to just send a text to start a conversation with my other friends. I just don’t know what to say most of the time since I’m usually the one initiating the conversation. A few of my friends actually know how to hold a decent conversation though.

I tend to have a feeling of inadequacy and that I’m doing others a favor by not bothering them. I also have felt like every eye is on me and every move is being watched when I am in public.The feeling that I’m too old to be regarded seriously has helped improve that feeling. I feel #2, and #3 as well. I also have felt very sensitive to what others said about me and the feeling that it would always be negative so #1 applies too. In looking for work in recent years I have felt like I had no job skills and would not learn how to do the job quickly enough to avoid being fired. I also worry about what is on the internet about me and that any company that has a computer background check will not hire me. I also used to have sensitive hearing and hear things people were saying about me or at least a hallucination of what they thought they were saying about me. My hearing has dulled which has improved things. My long term memory which used to replay all the bad things that happened to me over and over again has also dulled and I remember pleasant things more often.

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Being rejected is so hurtful and happens so often I can’t risk it.

Doing people a favor by not being around them.

Plus 1 and 2. Though I get really lonely, I have never been able to have friends. Sometimes though if I isolate enough in the right ways I forget about all of it and that is nice.

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I’m AAWOI

(Awkward and Working On It)

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  1. paranoid about others…I was verbally bullied growing up so I’ve learned not to trust most people.
  2. Paranoid - worried people will not understand my disorder and think I’m something I’m not.
  3. Paranoid - I feel as if I’ll be hurt one way or another by someone
  4. I find it stressful as I’m trying to prove to people that I’m okay when in reality I’m not.
  5. Just plain afraid of others. Like the saying from X-Files goes: TRUST NO ONE.

I avoid social engagement because it typically doesn’t prove to be very useful. It’s a little strange because I’m passionate about people. Yet, I find studying a good research paper or something similar leaves me feeling fascinated.

I Like to stay in my comfort zone.
I feel like I’m in a relationship with my self .
But in a situation I will act as if I’m normal so they don’t think something is wrong with me

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For me it’s reason 1 & 3…

1 and 3 is the reason for me, I always don know what to say when in a group conversation, i just silent and think a lot of non sense. I hope I can engage actually.

All three for me. It’s getting worse… I feel like it’s important to get out and be around people, and I wish I was a better friend, but inevitably someone says something off or looks at me the wrong way and I regret going out, and friends always want more than I can give… It’s frustrating and exhausting.

I don’t feel motivated to go out, and usually only go out if I need to or really want to alot. I watch baseball everyday and go on the computer a great deal or phone someone. But the more I stay in the more I talk to myself without control.