Your not stupid you beat me in a battle of words today…the sz is a beast you got this no worries be like fat Buddha and smile…I bet its killer why hide it…
The thought in our mind " may be" circulated to - as a whole and the person who we are imagine at that time, I am talking by teeth to the person whom I imagine and they reply as I hope. You have to verify it by your self.
I think many of us have gone through periods sturggling with the sz label. If there is meaning to be found in these hallucinations at all, maybe that is a suggestion. Once I was on the side of thinking it was schizophrenia, my voices certainly hadn’t stopped yet, and all they did was try and talk me out of that view. What worked for me was to emphasize the positives of schizophrenia over the alternatives, for I believe that when we are struggling with how to view things, it makes a difference how positive or negative we think of the available conceptions. Please remember that schizophrenia can be treated, that the brain can recover from it for quite some extent, and also, that here on the forums there many like you with schizophrenia.
Yes. But it is important to have the relevant alternatives in mind. I don’t know too much about your history, but for me when struggling with this, I did realize I was going through/just went through an extraordinarily intense period of my life. With experiences that made huge impact on me. As such, ‘normal’ is kinda gone. It worked for me to see these wild and disturbing experiences as a given, and then consider the conceptions or ways of looking at them. For me, the relevant alternatives that could make sense of it were a telepathy delusion, or some kind of psychotic illness. (I only considered two, but like you mentioned, the hallucinations suggest plain stupidity to you as one as well - and perhaps there were delusional interpretations in your past). For me, the positives of schizophrenia were the ones I mentioned: possibility of recovery etc. That may not sound too positive yet, but in comparison to my telepathy delusion, I emphasized, it was the better option. (Edit, I may also add, that I had a sense that my delusions were not acceptable for others when I was going through this, this also played a role. For ultimately, I justed wanted peace of mind and to be able to relate to my friends and family. Schizophrenia, though certainly no fun, has a place in their conception of the world, and as such, I would be able to ‘speak to them’ as it were. It was at that point almost like truth did not matter to me, I was more like, if my loved ones will call this psychosis, I will look at it like that as well because I want to be part of their lives in a way.) For I had no signs this telepathy was ever going to end, I was stuck with two voices that displayed horrible personalities, and it was bothering me each moment of the day.
For you, to make sz more attractive, the possibility of recovery of the brain - that is not there when you’re plain stupid, the latter is for ever. I don’t know what delusions have troubled you, but I can imagine they were no good for your peace of mind.
@flybottle is right, the possibilty of recovery it’s what matters.
Getting stuck on an endless loop of “why is this happening to me” is not good for any situation, getting out of that is the most rewarding thing for us.
Mental illness is no walk in the park, that’s why so many of us have disabilty priviledges from our governments. But it can be fun, once we’ve accepted the illness.
When I say fun I don’t mean having symptoms and dealing with them, but when we strive for recovery and accomplish goals. Or when symptoms start to fade away. Or when we finally are able to laugh from the crazy things we do.
You mentioned the cool kind of crazy in another thread and it got me thinking, I haven’t met any cool kind of crazy yet in my life. I think the distinction of the various kinds of crazy it’s a bit self-stigmatizing “I’m crazy, but I want to be the good kind of crazy”, I think you just want to be better, in all honesty. And that’s what you should thrive for. Being better, learning how to deal with the illness.
It really is. I’m not in the position to get meds right now… Its a really long story as to why. So for now I just have to fight through it and stay strong. It’s really getting to me though.