Schizophrenia.com

No one to go out with

I have one friend who’s also schizophrenic but she’s in and out of hospital and have many symptoms and is hard to go out with me. I used to have another friend who I could go out with(she was bi-polar), but she was close to normal and I always felt inferior to her. And she abruptly left me by calling me “selfish”. So I’ve lost confidence in my abilities to get along with anyone close to normal.

Currently, the only person I can go out with is my mother. She’s nice, but I want a new friend who I can feel comfortable to talk to and to go out with.

I tend to feel comfortable with someone who has lots of symptoms, but if they have lots of symptoms it is difficult for them to go out. But I feel uncomfortable with someone who is close to normal and able to go out.

What do you think I should do

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Don’t you have any place where people with MI meet? I attend out meetings every monday evening. We are about 20 people with different disabilities. We support each other.

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Friendship and bonds can be formed outside your dz. hobbies are a great place to start. I play sports and have a handful of friends I play ball with. If you work, you can form bonds there as well. Don’t think you have no one to go out with because you are sz. When you take this approach, more than likely you will not be able to ‘keep up’ with other people. Even normies and extroverts struggle with this, just remember to take things slowly and with an open mind. I know it is difficult with a dz like sz, but like anything in life, it takes repetition, practice, patience, and remember to throw in a little creativity. Sz people are full of creativity and remember that so they will remember you (as long it is not crazy, abnormal behavior). Good luck, and a hug

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I’m in the same boat
I have my mum but would love to have a friend to spend time with
I made friends at college but they were in relationships and had their own group of friends
I try to go out to groups such as yoga and confidence building class so I can be around others

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I used to go to this day care center once a week where 8-10 mentally ill ppl gather, and we cook or watch DVDs or do something enjoyable together. But I felt really uncomfortable in that situation. I didn’t make any friends. Well, exchanging phone numbers or emails between members are not allowed or at least not encouraged by the staff anyway.

So it didn’t lead to anything outside that group.

Try not to do that. You’re just as good as anyone else. They don’t have to fight the demons you have to fight with. If they had our problems they would have a hard time coping too.

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It’s hard to make freinds with normal ppl because I feel inferior to them

I guess the inferiority is what makes it so hard for me to make friends.
I don’t think there’s someone who gets interested in who I am because I think I’m boring.

That sounds nice
I guess I’m not ready for that king of thing yet

I struggled with feeling inferior the good majority of the illness. Do you have a skill that others might look up to you for? For me, I can hit a baseball better than most of my teammates. They may think less of me because of my poor social skills, but they appreciate that I have a skill that rivals or may be better than theirs. In this instance, I may have the upper hand. It is a balancing act, but think of a skill you may have that can give you an ‘in’ into a friendship. Now, even though I do have a few of these skills, I still try my best to put forth like I have it all together when in truth, I don’t. It is a high wire walk we are doing all the time and our goal is simply to make it to the other side. To me, being and feeling safe and sound is all I am after at the end of the day. If you would like some information on discovering a new recreational activity, I would be happy to give a link to my website that details how to find a new passion, something that you can practice and work on so you have something other than sz to bring to the table

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I have a few skills that others might look up to, such as painting skills. But I don’t know, whenever a friend asks me to paint something, I feel used but then I feel that’s the only thing I can do for them, so I paint a picture for them. So if I have skills that are better than a friend, they try to use them, so i try to hide the skills…
which leads to feeling like I’m nothing.

I don’t pretend to have all the answers, but just have a routine… do the same thing you do with your art until you find someone that doesn’t leave you feeling like nothing. people are people, everyone has their own issues/ agendas.

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After some bad experiences of painting for friends, I’ve decided to not paint for anyone anymore. That’s my new rule. I just want to feel equal and wonder why it’s so hard.

sz is a monster of an illness, I get how it is. i understand how it feels to not be an equal. if you do not mind me asking, how old are you?

I’m 37, male, and live in California

I’m 36, female, live in Japan

i enjoy competing in basketball and baseball and love watching all sports. I listen to all types of music, except gangster rap (its too noisy!). I have a small handful of friends, only one I consider a close friend. I’ve never been married, but would like to someday. Because I don’t hear voices, I can work- my current job is in sales; I have had about 25 jobs since I turned 16. My favorite vacation spots are Taiwan and anywhere with blue, sandy beaches. I’m Sagittarius.

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Thanks for letting me know more about you. I don’t have a job now. I used to do many part-time jobs. Now I go to this work training center for getting a job one day. I like classic, pop, rock music but I don’t listen to much music lately. I like to go to art exhibitions or movies. I’m capricorn. If ur sagittarius ur birthday is coming close, right?

that’s right! it has been awhile since i have celebrated a birthday, usually i’ll just spend it with family. I’m building the courage to ask a few friends out this year, nothing crazy, maybe dinner and a basketball game, something like that. sometimes all it takes are these few precious words to change our thinking and attitude. i always felt like i was not worthy of friends, even on a birthday. maybe this year will be different. my name is Eugene.

Hi Eugene, :slight_smile:
That sounds nice, sometimes what it takes for something nice and wonderful is alittle courage to ask for it. Hope you will spend a wonderful birthday this year. When exactly is it?
Maybe I need that courage too and probably I’ll make friends.
My name is Rie.

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