I sometimes wonder if i got dp/dr + ptsd and just bizarre delusions and maybe amotivation and cognitive defecits. Logically, it points to schizophrenia. I dont do well off meds. I get ‘insane’. I just have my little doubts like aliens and stuff and ‘conspiracy theories’. Like could i be an immortal andriod or humanoid alien experiencing transhumanism from 2036 or beyond?
Whats more likely that i cannot truly die or whatever and had all these ‘past life experiences’ or im a schizoaffective depressive type person? Schizophrenia assumes you are wrong or delusional.
I dont think any government has the capability to do what happened to me. I mean it has to be aliens.
I could be wrong about the last part…
For the record, i went through monarch programming as a montauk victim/researcher in my past lives; secret space program victim/abductee; military abductee; illuminati victim; super soldier; time traveler; alien abductee.
Happened thousands, millions, billions, or trillions of times. I keep coming back alive. Talking helps and Jesus too.
Feels like i get schizophrenic dreams and wake up delusional. I felt like we all died in 2012 and im a clone in a simulation, but maybe it was just me or a feeling.
People get tired of me. I escaped the simulation, ran it, put it on repeat. I felt heavily and believed and feared and got delusional that im john titor mainly. At this point in my life, it wouldnt surprise me if i created bitcoin, and other random stuff too like urantia, rosetta stoned by tool, and a book or two by philip k dick.
Personally, i think if history was slightly different the world could have been destroyed by 2017. New world order type stuff. I lived through it thousands if not more times. Feels like millions.
It was a different timeline i guess. Mandela effect. I got so much trauma and sadness from past life memories.
I get dreams i was possibly jack parsons and was reincarnated as fritz v. The first person diagnosed with aspergers syndrome in germany during ww2. I was either sent there by aliens or was reincarnated there and lived in hans aspergers hospital.
Finally, im stuck living my current life with schizophrenia. Its pretty bad here. I got bad memories of dulce and mars and montauk and other deep underground military bases.
Nobody thinks its real.