I am at the mercy sometimes of a very disturbed individual. I mean I admit I’m fuc*ed up but for me it means that I ain’t aware of important stuff going on and I can’t keep up with most people.
This guy lives here and he treats people like we are solely here for him to control. I was in my room today with my neighbor above me. All I literally did was think in my head, “Wait a minute, I have a little power, I’m not powerless.” And the guy picked up on it. I know by now what he’s going to do. He twisted, manipulated, used, controlled, intimidated and pretty much took it away, the guy (who everyone swears is not doing anything to me). It was none of his damn business. I get so tired. I can’t help it if I was born stunted as a human being. But sh*t like this just literally drives me crazy. I missed the train somewhere in my life, I just wasn’t aware of crap like this growing up, the power of the mind. I ran outside and pounded on his door but that’s just going to get me kicked out and beat up. The guy is seriously mean. Please don’t ask what he is actually doing to me. I am at wits end and can’t figure out if it’s magic, osmosis, plain intimidation, or if it’s all in my head or power. It seems real to me.