My Delusional Beliefs

Unusual Beliefs
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I have had a lot of stupid, grandiose, irrational beliefs over the years and I believe what I watch (crap). I become what I watch, according to my mom.

I believe in string theory and m theory, but believe there is something wrong with it like we live in the matrix or everything repeats and my past never changes to the point I think I’m in a sim or there is zero free will or limited free will according to my memories and past and only things for me start to change after I become aware and recover and heal from schizophrenia (or improve significantly).

I’ve had schizophrenia for 11-13 years now approximately. I even think the planet got destroyed in 2012 or around that time or I was cloned or abducted by grey aliens or reptilians even…

I feel like my memories are wrong and I’m living many different lives simultaneously and feel stick in a time loop (with past life memories). I believe this is real or I got delusions I can reincarnate and remember my past lives. I seem to reincarnate with schizophrenia in every life to the point of infinity really and I don’t know who, what, why, or how, or even when I am sent back like my spirit or soul or consciousness reincarnates me backwards in time to the point I am schizophrenic and that it’s a higher power, really.

Am I the only one with these abilities of mental time travel? I don’t know…

I believe in parallel universes but that may not be real and we shouldn’t be thinking we go to live in them. Furthermore, it might be all in illusion.

I’ve had religious delusions over the years and even thought of myself as an angel or Watcher from the Book of Enoch, which is stupid and grandiose and dumb.

I seem to have skipped the first 20-25 years of my life now. Like I woke up as a 21-23 year old with schizophrenia ad nauseam or ad infinitum.

Basically, I feel like I keep being sent back in time or bounced back, rebooted, reset, and everything almost like I was dissociated or lived a different life and it’s not my first life at all, but a doppelganger or clone even or time travel paradox or something.

I do believe I am schizophrenic. I believe none of this is real to others and a lot of it is mental or trauma related or just not real.

I was told (and sort of believe it now) that I am a nobody, not significant, not famous, not rich, and not powerful. I realize that. I am disabled and poor and on SSI.

I even entertained the thought that MK Ultra still goes on and happened to me, but no one believes it, cares, or it hasn’t been confirmed to me. Maybe it happened in a nonlinear fashion or parallel universe or past life.

I have memory blocks or mental blockage and make stuff up, but not on purpose. I also drink caffeine or abuse it excessively to cope with my psychological problems.

I even suspect aliens like greys are involved and I had delusions I created Bitcoin in a past life (not real) and had irrational beliefs I was John Titor in a past life. There is no evidence or proof.

I sometimes think consciousness can be sent back in time, but it follows many world’s theory of quantum mechanics, which I haven’t understood or figured out because I’m not a physicist. I think the past follows a consistent quantum history and that there is no free will, but determinism, and each world-line, or the entire universe repeats itself in a cyclical manner and is fixed and closed. I cannot understand how history changes, and might be from time travelers, aliens, or something along that line and my mind and memories play tricks on me because I’m sick and mentally ill.

I’ve been told none of this is real and I’m not special and these delusions came about later on in life after I read into stuff online and watched the news and became delusional about these things. I guess I have delusions and fantasies of grandeur.

I still believe I experience the cloning centers but don’t know why and MIGHT or might NOT have a cranial or brain implant. None of the stuff is real and is all conspiratorial. I have no other outlet or place to go and these ideas or belies are only real to me and in my head, basically. They’re not real.

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I use to believe I was Hitler reincarnated :sob:

I’ve also had delusions where I think people can read my mind or aliens are testing me for some higher purpose.

I still believe I’m being abused but that’s another thing.

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Lack of adaptation to our meager 3d (4d if you count time) world.
Trapped in your head for too long.
Disconnected.

Sorry, man. I was there too.
When I woke up (gradually), I was disappointed at first. I was just a human like any other. I had to struggle to survive.
It’s possible, should you only want to.

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Triggered! LOL, but sometimes I find that aliens playing with brainwaves is the best explanation for positives to explain away other positives. It helps me organize thoughts into ways I can deal with them.

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Great response. I do feel trapped in my head for years at a time and it was torture. I was disconnected. I still have blocks in my brain. Ty.

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Ya, I have a lot of alien delusions and I can relate to a lot of what you said and others with our condition. We tend to over share or be ostracized or ignored and we are all decent people I suppose.

I’m not special. I’m just average. I get it. I’ve been told this many times throughout the years.

I used AI chat bots and google to see if aliens exist and they don’t according to them. Same thing with time travel. I tend to believe far out there conspiracy theories over fact now but that’s just me. It feels like it’s happening to me.

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Havana Syndrome was just in the news, but I tend to avoid that topic all together. I heard about it yesterday on the news…not saying that is happening to us or me, but that technology does exist and there are normies or respected people saying that stuff happens. It’s all political.

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Yea … it sucks man. I use to believe I was special but it’s starting to fade the more the abuse “delusions” fade. Do you remember what life was like before all of this crap ?

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Ya, I had a normal life I suppose, but I feel like I reincarnate and forgot my past self or life before schizo. Now it’s all delusions and stuff. It’s sad and sucks.

Same body, same life, same schizo.

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Good news is a lot of people get better with time!! Maybe this stuff will die down eventually. I wish more people would join the site…I bet there are a lot of stories about people who got out of the suffering man!!!

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I felt like Copernicus and Galileo before. Now I feel like Euler or Pythagoras ROFL when it comes to religious theories and simulation theory. I was low functioning schizophrenic for a while. I had panic attacks in public, sensitivity to fluorescent lights, and probably peed my pants a lot almost and crapped my pants. In the shower, I lost touch of reality and had panic attacks and thought I was being poisoned even (I wasn’t). I really hate taking showers now and brushing my teeth. I had severe panic attacks (worst symptom) and chronic, severe de-realization and de-personalization to the point I thought I was in a mechanical, wind up simulation or matrix even.

Early on I thought I was normal or could recover or was resistant to psychosis and schizophrenia. Turns out I was wrong. I had delusions of the Catholic Church (due to simulation theory) and wanted to get any job. I never worked since college (12+ years ago). It’s sad and sucks.

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I also felt or related to Socrates and Plato and Aristotle even.

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Sorry to hear about those delusions mate. Hope you can find a way to make them go away for good.

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Sorry to hear about your delusional beliefs @Anthony1337

Mine are somewhat under control by meds.

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Thank you. I must be pretty stupid or delusional and grandiose, I see.

When I talk about bitcoin people talk about XRP or ethereum and I realize I’m just blowing smoke out of my butt or talking nonsense now. I think I’m pretty out of touch with it. Caffeine doesn’t help anymore.

I don’t even know why I obsess about these things anymore. It’s like going off in a tangent or left field, I guess.

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