I’ve noticed mornings are a bit rough recently. I’ve been agitated and twitchy, waiting for my codeine to be doled out to me.
I’m practicing winner talk in my head, I don’t need codeine I don’t need codeine…
But mornings are also lovely. It’s time I get with my six month old kitten, Tiggy, alone. He likes my dressing gown and I become his Mum when I wear it.
He suckles and kneads it, like he is nursing.
I like being up before the sun and before the neighbours when it is dark and quiet in the neighbourhood. I can hear the occasional car pass over the train tracks way up the road. Noise travels further in the morning.
I can’t sit still. Maybe I drink too much coffee in the mornings? I’m starting to prefer tea anyway.
I haven’t read a book in a while. Maybe I should try to do that.
I’m trying to get a good calendar template on excell, my Mum usually prints me out my calendars for my to put appointments on.
I like to read this forum in the morning and feel part of a community.
Thanks for reading.
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I like waking up before dawn as well…it’s very relaxing. The dew on the grass in the summer with birds chirping while I’m sipping coffee, maybe reading a book. Nothing can beat it. The paranoia is less because I know everyone is asleep.
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It could be withdrawal from codeine as you’re getting less. Did you get your liver test results back yet?
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Yes I got my results back. My liver enzymes are at double the normal level so I have been warned that my liver won’t be metabolising my normal medications properly and I might get more side effects. OR a build up of my antipsychotics and antidepressants.
My psychiatrist prescribed me straight codeine phosphate so I avoid the paracetemol levels I am ingesting when I take my regular over the counter codeine.
He worked out a cut down plan for me. I take the straight codeine on work days because it’s stronger, and I take my regular codeine on off days (I’m at five a day on those currently). So I take three codeine pills at work this coming week, then two the following week, then one the next week, then none.
I also have to get drug counselling.
Thank you for following up on my liver test @everhopeful you’re a kind soul.
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That’s brilliant news about the codeine! I’m really happy to hear that. Also your liver should return to normal. You’ve been very brave and sensible turtle! Fingers crossed it all gets back to normal quickly.
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It’s really hard, I love the high so much.
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In that case, you should consider http://na.org.au . Whenever you’re ready.
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Hi, turtle. Good afternoon. Do you need help with quitting codeine? One of the first things I remember I learned in AA 26 years ago is that an alcoholic can’t quit drinking solely by will power. It applies to drugs too. You can’t go it alone, you need support and help. I have rough mornings too.
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I do need help Nick. I have checked the NA meetings like @everhopeful suggested but there aren’t any near me I can get to. But I am going to go to drug counselling.
Thank you for replying to me, you are very kind.
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I think drug counseling in place of NA should work fine for you. It’s good that you’ll be doing something, that’s what’s important. I never did either, and I think that’s why I am still on suboxone after all these years. I think I would have benefited from counseling.
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I like mornings too. Nobody is up. I can walk around town or go for a bike ride out of town. Trying to restart meditating in the early hours. You might try timeanddate.com for your calendar template. I should know this-why are you on the codeine? Drugs are hell.
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Thanks @anon68237654 I have very good support from people such as yourself on here too. So really I am very lucky.
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I started because of dental pain then I got hooked on it. I am very ashamed of myself.
I must get off it to save my liver from irreparable damage.
One of the greatest pleasures in AA, CA, or NA for someone who has a little recovery under their belt is helping other people who have substance abuse problems. And we do that my sharing our knowledge and our own experience in recovery. We like to share HOW we got clean and how we STAY clean. But even old-timers can still learn something from newcomers in the programs.
You might want to look into online meetings. Good luck.
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Yes, @anon68237654 is right. 12-step programs aren’t the only way to get clean. Drug counseling helps. Other treatments work too. It just depends on the individual person getting clean. I used to be a 12-step program snob. I thought that 12-step programs were the best way to get clean and that nothing else worked. Now I know that’s not true, but AA, NA, and CA worked well for me and I celebrated 26 years clean on January 1st of this year. I can’t say enough good things about AA or NA or CA…
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Turtle I just thought I would mention that I got clean in AA even though I’m an addict, not an alcoholic. I went to AA meetings for years and in all that time, only two people complained about an addict being in AA meetings.
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Thanks Nick. Maybe I will look for an AA meeting instead.
I’m going to try the drug counselling first though.
Today I delayed getting high by a few hours after starting to suffer withdrawals. And what I took isn’t really enough to get high anyway, it’s probably more psychological comfort.
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The two people who complained will probably be dissipated to zero, after all these years there’s much less stigma in aa, at least, for being an addict. I’m more of an addict than an alcoholic but introduce myself as “Jon and I’m an alcoholic”…then I start talking and say “but I’m an addict!” It throws them off guard but they get it. Some girl once said its the “spirit that is inflicted by this disease”, and an alcoholic drinks “spirits”…get it? It’s a pun. So she calls herself an alcoholic. She was strictly crack cocaine and heroin. I worry in na sometimes people will go to meetings trying to sell drugs, or so I hear. I would like to go to na, hell I’ve been to a ca meeting. I’m sure opiate anonymous will become increasingly popular the next 30 years…but I go to aa.
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I was hooked on crack cocaine for quite a while and I cold turkey it’s been 9 and a half years since I touched it. I don’t believe u need AA. I did it all on my own. I don’t even drink or smoke weed. I only smoke cigarettes
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