So I got married a little over two years ago. (Second marriage) We moved to his home town up in the mountains. I had to get a new job too. These are positive things. I’ve been struggling the whole time though. I used to be in great shape but I’ve gained a bunch of weight. I’m not exercising. I love my husband but it’s hard when I have no trust and the voices tell me he doesn’t love me and is cheating. My therapist, before I got married and moved, actually said to me,“are you sure you want to get married? Do you really want to do that to him?” Now I know what she meant. I love him, but I feel like I’m trapped sometimes. I can’t settle. I feel bad. Anyone?
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I don’t know what your relationship is like, so I don’t know if it would work, but when I start feeling the panicky trapped feeling, I talk about it with my fiancé. He is usually able to calm me down, and we work on finding a way for me to feel free again. Usually, he helps me pay for a trip to go visit one of my friends. I have a huge need for travel and spontaneity in my life.
I don’t know how to help with the lack of trust and the paranoia. I’ve never had that directed at him before. Usually, that only comes out around people I shouldn’t be trusting anyways. Maybe if you told him what you’re hearing, he could reassure you? I don’t know if that would work or not.
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That’s very good advice, to just tell him is a good idea. He’s a good and kind person. I’ve told him things before and he gets hurt and frustrated because he’s trying so hard to be a good husband. He doesn’t understand sz and he avoids talking about it. It’s catch22, because I get bombarded with paranoid delusions, I often just go there and blurt out some ugly words, he gets hurt and frustrated, I gather myself and apologize and try to explain and he doesn’t ask me questions or anything to try to understand, and I’m hurt for real… You’re lucky your fiancé understands and has the ability to support you. We don’t have much money. Ok, I’m in a funk. I really appreciate your input. I need to explain more to my poor husband…
Just remind him that you know it isn’t his fault, even if you can’t control your feelings.
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Thank you. I had a conversation with him this morning because of your enouragement. I just reminded him of what is happening in my head and that I don’t want him to either be overly offended or to invalidate what I’m feeling. Anyway, I really appreciate your advice! 
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Has your husband ever given you a reason to not trust him? I mean, is this lack of trust coming from him, or you? As in have you been hurt by someone you trusted, and this makes you sensitive to trusting again?
The way I see it (from experience) is that when your in a committed relationship, you have to either trust them, or don’t be with them.
If you have enough evidence to not trust them, don’t annoy them by constantly questioning their every move, they know you are only asking because you want to be reassured and will say anything to keep the status quo.
…and you will accept it for the same reason.
The real damage comes from those who aren’t doing anything wrong, and your constant vigilance will only cause him to distance himself from you, which in turn causes you more anxiety that something is wrong, and it is,
but it’s you, not him.
…and further the gap widens.
Can you recall being accused of something you didn’t do?
and not believed when you were honestly not?
Hurts, didn’t it?
Imagine having to endure this “till death do you part”
- not many would.
and those that do, are miserable.
Do you really want him to stay with you?
Then do the things that will make him want to stay with you, love and trust him with all your heart, make him proud to have you for his wife. Make him happy enough that he wouldn’t think of going someplace else.
Love should be blind (but not stupid.)
If you come across something that gives you doubt, pursue it quietly but rationally,
…and always trust your instincts, but don’t always act on your instincts.
So,
to make a long story short,
Either trust him with all your heart,
or don’t.
if you don’t, then let him go free.
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I’m in a committed relationship have been for 7 years almost 8. I love my partner with all my heart. But the paranoia, voices and insecurity get to be a bit much. But I talk to her about.
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open dialogue is imperative…
my voices would talk in my head and put doubts in my mind…
like
mrs. sith is cheating
she poisoned the food
kill her…go on kill her
nice stuff like that… 
you have to make the internal decision to trust your true inner self that ’ i trust this relationship '…as opposed you trusting the voices.
take care 
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You understand that I’m hearing these suggestions and not just thinking stuff up. I am told that he’s miserable and would b better off without me and that I need to end my life and so end the suffering of my husband… I am told that he doesn’t love me and wants out, etc. Thank you @cbbrown,@darksith, and @Csummers for excellent advice that seems to come down to deciding to trust, communicate, and to be the person he fell in love with. I’m determined to do all of that. 
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I’m told similar things from Aaron and Rebecca two of the voices I hear. I tell my partner. Usually if I don’t tell her just right she gets a little mad that I would ever let the voices of convincing me of such things.
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I’m glad you talked to him. I’m a fan of open communication under all circumstances (except in customer service, where the less honest you are, the better).
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Yeah, it’s hard for my husband to understand, but I had a good talk with him today. He said he doesn’t want to dwell on the sz, but I tried to explain that it’s my everyday, and that it helps to talk about it. It doesn’t make sense to him, but he’s trying.
Nobody really wants to dwell on it. It is unpleasant. But talking helps. I’m glad he’s trying to understand.
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Thank you @cj9556 ️