Living in constant fear of psychosis

DX'd - Other
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Anyone here not psychotic at the moment at all but living in constant unremitting fear of having another psychotic episode?

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Right now Iā€™m afraid of falling into the deep end again.

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As of lately, yes.

But try not to think about it.

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I was like that, but the more it didnā€™t happen, the less concerned I was about it. Now I donā€™t even think about it. Time should heal that fear for you.

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So Iā€™m gonna follow this with a question.
If youā€™re not psychotic right now and you are on medication, what seems to be the problem?
What state are you in if you arenā€™t experiencing psychosis?

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I have experienced lots of mood swings. Also under high stress becoming paranoid and suicidal. But never lost touch with the reality in contrary to psychosis. When I am starting to feel unwell I know it and can prevent it getting worse (asking for support, self management techniquesā€¦). When psychotic in the past I had no insight whatsoever. But most of the time (85%) feeling just normal. ā€œNormieā€ as called on the forumšŸ˜‰

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Iā€™ve been in 5 month long psychosis

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Wow this could not be more relevant to my day. Had a horrible nightmare last night about my psychosis returning that had me basically wake up with a panic attack. Then had experiences today that made me fear this as well.

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The medā€™s keep away psychosis for me. When I look back on some of the ways I behaved when I was psychotic I can only shudder. Itā€™s a miracle I survived.

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10

Iā€™m depressed. Negative symptoms are pretty bad now (Anhedonia/Avolition).

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I donā€™t know if I believe in negative symptoms.
I was diagnosed as scizoaffective but Iā€™m being treated for depression pretty aggressively and the anhedonia and avolition are going away.
I was really hollow and empty before now Iā€™m starting to have feelings.

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I sure hope this is true. It has been for me so far.

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I believe in negative symptoms, Iā€™ve been on several antidepressants and feel just as hollow/socially withdrawn

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Lately itā€™s been weird for me. Iā€™m on a low dose of zyprexa (olanzapine) and Iā€™m doing pretty well but I have these spells/episodes out of the blue of psychosis. Where I feel paranoid, fearful, and somewhat delusional. Iā€™m bringing it up ton my psych at my next appointment but usually when it happens I take a klonopin or two and fall asleep and wake up fine, itā€™s really strange. Anyone else ever experience episodes/panic attacks like this?

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So in a sense, at the present time Iā€™m living in constant fear of psychosis. Really effects me never knowing when an episodes going to occur, I just keep klonopin near at all times.

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I have psychosis several times a week, it is unpredictable. Usually once I feel it coming on I take 200mg seroquel. Sometimes that takes care of it sometimes it doesnā€™t. For really bad days I take a lot of seroquel. Interestingly I never become psychotic while sleeping. I think my brain has to be active for it to happen, I never wake up psychotic. If I did that would be hell.

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Whatā€™s your perscribed dosage of seroquel?

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I used to feel afraid. But I have been ok for a year. Iā€™m on 25 mg Abilify and 300 mg Seroquel.

Stress, anxiety, fear can make you feel psychotic. Try to keep calm.

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Ever get tired? I was on 10mgs of abilify and could barely make it through the day without napping once or twice, once on a commute home I had to pull over and take an impromptu nap lol. Needless to say Iā€™m on zyprexa now.

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I sleep 6-8 hours on Abilify and Seroquel.

I had Zyprexa before but I gained too much weight and got strange side effects.