Ive given up on friends

I mean, for now. Just feels like i was always the only one scheduling plans, and then theyd never happen. Ive only seen like 3 friends this year one time each. It was kind of agonizing how isolated i felt against my will so my brain just flipped a switch and gave up, so now its more like chosen isolation which feels so much better. Im not most peoples cup of tea, most people find me annoying im told because im hyperactive and clingy, and ive tried to change to be more likeable but its just hardwired into me, so ill just be myself on my own :man_shrugging:

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You could be burning your friends out. You appear to be in an unending state of crisis, which can cause those around you to have to pull back for their own mental health. You may have exceeded the limit of what they can handle.

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Hm, idk. I go into episodes a lot but i only had one this year so far though it lasted for 2 months so far, probably not over with. I get that im a burden though

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I was awkward as a young adult. I have mellowed since.

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Oh jeeze awkward is my middle name

Just so you know, your comment made me feel really bad about myself and like i should be completely alone.

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Well we’re always here at the forum to help.

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Could you arrange a card game night? That would take the edge of anxiety about conversing.

Not trying to make you feel bad about yourself, but suggesting a possible issue. People can only take so much in a support role. It’s not your fault if you’re really ill, but it’s not their fault either if they have to step back to preserve their own health.

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I felt excluded. Was called oddball. Which I am to an extent. But I always felt used. Part of out group. Would be last person to know about things. Would know about meetups week or month after.
Have difficulty tolerating small talk. Realized I am better on my own than drained and lonely with friends.

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I have very good family near me. I have no friends. Meeting my daughter’s mother was kismet . In psych hospital together, sizeable age gap and very different backgrounds,but we just got on very well together. A dating ap would never in 10000 years have said we were a possible match.

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I like the quote: ‘no matter what you do 1/3 will like you, 1/3 will dislike you and 1/3 will be indifferent. So do yourself a favor and be yourself’.

I’m sure when the timing is right you’ll be able to make new friends or reconnect with old friends.

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Having friends is nice but is usually overrated. You can have as much fun alone. You could also make friends online if that’s your cup of tea. Just don’t let it get you down, you’re better off choosing what makes you happiest and healthiest.

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I’m alone and it’s cold and dark. My brother said I was a survivor, alone since 2008, but I’ve been abusing myself as a way to cope. That is if you consider your voices to be you, a trick of the mind. The imagination is godlike and I was born very imaginative. My mom didn’t show me affection as a toddler and I escaped into my imagination so I’ve never been real. I dissociated later on because of family arguments. I’ve never mourned another’s death. Maybe I’m too lost and unreachable, someone you can’t work with. I am alone but not by choice.

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Im sure this is not what you meant, but what you said made me feel like a massive burden to my friends, which i was already feeling but trying to manage it and you just kinda confirmed it i guess.

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Even some good friends cannot handle the burden sometimes. It just becomes detrimental to them

I think it can be true of family as well

We’re not the only ones who have to live with it

Affects everyone around us

Some people can’t hack it

Don’t take it personally, just people sometimes have only so much they can give

Might be selfish of them for not giving the time for that person, but equally might be selfish to have a friendship that has no balance (Not saying this is true in your case, just an observation)

But yea, I gave up on friends about 10 years ago

My parents take a lot of the strain, as well as sometimes people here and the MH professionals.

However, I think this can be mitigated by doing things you can do for them in your own way. Doesn’t have to be ground breaking or anything major, but just helping.

I hope you understand this message not to be a criticism, but I just wanted to pass comment on the subject of ‘being a burden’.

As like it or not, it is what it is.

All in the mitigation. Improvement. Just trying or simply being there for when that person may need you too

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I’m tired if my friends. They are all selfish and egotistical.

They don’t give a sh-it about me.

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I dont really have any friends around here. Maybe 1 that i get nervous to hang out with cause of my anxiety. I miss going over to a friends house and just cooking and hanging out and playing video games.

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Yeah it can be difficult for anyone as an adult to maintain friends. I myself struggle to make and keep them. I think its becoming increasingly regular for friends to not spend time together much within the same vicinity. We are becoming all so hooked to getting our social fix from social media and all sorts of other reasons.
Anyway dont let it get you down ay?
:slight_smile:

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no way

Seems like me. I´m the only person around not “busy enough” to give all of my friends conversation. But it doesn´t happen the other way around.

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