hi! I’m still a newbie in this forum and I would like to share my experience.
I’m still thinking that what I’m doing is actually thought broadcasting. It usually happens anywhere at all. It applies to most people (within my range) but somehow, people close to me (loved ones & friends) aren’t affected by it. I did not know why though. The only ones affected by my thought broadcasting are actual strangers. It also applies on media like RADIO Stations.
They usually talk loudly, repeating what I’m currently thinking at the moment or what I have done these past few days. I try my best not to think of anything; however, when I pass by my usual way with a crowd scattered along the way, they would usually mock and provoke me whenever I’m not thinking
about them. The more I prevent myself from thinking about them, the more I think of them.
I cannot say it’s delusional since it is real. I kept telling myself it’s just in my head; however, when they provoke me, I end up cursing them and they would say stuff like “She’s scared that’s why she’s doing that.” or “She’s responding again.”
It’s hard not to think that I’m the one they’re referring to and it’s too coincidental with their choice of words whenever I’m nearby. I want to think it’s delusional since it’s curable. Otherwise, I don’t know how to bring back my privacy anymore!
This started up when I was bullied on a new work place. It totally changed my view on life and now, I’m battling it alone. With prayers and trust, I am able to stay alive. But there are times I would like to end things easily.
Is this delusional? Is this really thought broadcasting?