Insecure and manic

so today I went to see my friend, to get her phone number I didn’t have it before I bumped into her the other day she handed me her number didn’t even invite me in:(
admittedly was soaking wet and had a soaking wet dog I am so inse3cure in friendships just don’t know if she likes me now.
I bumped into her the other day and acted al weird because I hadn’t slept much.
I just want to have friends like a normal person!

It’s hard for me to make friends too. I have one friend from community college who I am only in contact with through email. I revealed to her my diagnosis and didn’t hear from her for a long time. I started to become paranoid that she had rejected me because of my diagnosis. So I sent her an email asking her if she was okay. She finally emailed back, and I felt great relief.

Your friend probably still likes you. Just give her time.

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thanks caroline, itsd not easy is it! I think most people keep their friends for college/work etc.
think im just overthinking it lol when will I learn.

I have a hard time making friends too. I always have a lot!! i envy the people on here that say they spent time with their friends because I’ve never really had that. And when i did have some back in school i didn’t appreciate what it really meant and now they have moved on with their lives and we still keep in contact on facebook but it’s not a true friendship anymore. I think your right you may be overthinking it a bit. That’s the problem when you have few friends, i do it too. :slight_smile:

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exactly runnergirl would have kept in contact if id know how hard it is to make friends lol.
ive calmed down a lot thanks to you guys talking sense to me hehe
cheers! xxxxxx

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I often get myself worked up over friends who I think are ready to leave my life. I get stupid about this and sometimes cut them out first. Only to find out there was a valid reason why they were so different with me from one time to the next. You know, it never dawns on me until much later to ask if everything is OK.

I used to blame every friend I lost on SZ. But I find now, that was not the case. One friend who was really important to me has come back into my life with the help of his kid sis and my kid sis working together.

When I was first crumbling, he was coming out of the closet. I thought he was being different towards me because I had SZ. He thought I dropped him flat because I was homophobic. He had NO idea I landed in hospital due to my big psychotic break. I had NO idea he was trying to come to terms with this new self-discovery.
It wasn’t until just a few months ago that we ended up in the same place at the same time and managed to start talking again and clear up that misunderstanding after all these years.

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I’ve lost a few friends because of my SZ, and a few family members. My father is SZ but he denies it and refuses to take medication. He blames my illness on my partner. Whenever i talk to my mom about what’s going on with me she ignores it, goes silent or changes the subject. I’ve lost a couple of friends because of my SZ, one when i told her why i wasn’t going to school anymore or working i told her the truth and she hasn’t spoken to me since. Another i was close friends with for years, i looked up to her like a big sister and she just cut me off once she found out my diagnosis.

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