It’s fake most of the time anyways… im a kind person but sometimes niceness isn’t truthful… if I want to do anything in the world ive got to build tougher skin. if i really want to make a difference i can’t take things so personally.
5 Likes
thats how i feel. im the same way. fucken people
the bad thing about just not giving a f$$ck about what others think aboute you is that it can alienate you from the community as a whole.
just be honest if you can it doesn’t have to be personal, honesty is the best policy 
1 Like
Sometimes being nice is no use. Is too passive agressive also. I agree with @asgoodasitgets on this, truth is the the best policy
if I want to do anything in the world ive got to build tougher skin.
I’ve developed a tougher skin. But this is completely different to being nice. You can have a tougher skin but be nice too.
Maybe talk about assertiveness with your therapist if you have one.
Assertiveness is about balancing your needs with the needs of others.
2 Likes
In my country atleast – being brutal is the norm , since the past 2000 years atleast.
Here Might is Right is the motto and everyone lives by that.
The days of being nice are long over – atleast in my country…In all fairness and honesty, Nothing can ever be accomplished nowadays by being nice.
Honestly is the best policy is not really relevant anymore. Just my 2 cents opinion.
Not trying to be argumentative, but I’m alienated anyway. I think being honest about who you are, how you feel and what you think is the best route because people will embrace or alienate you (us) no matter what. If you’re true to yourself then you have that satisfaction. If you try to be nice and get stepped on or rejected, that adds to the bitterness of it. If you’re defensive and harsh, then people may misunderstand why. Either way, whatever is true for you in your interactions is all you’re responsible for. You can’t change others behavior, only your own…
1 Like
There are parts of the US that are like that also, and there are other parts where people are plagued by the insecurity of being people-pleasers.
I myself was raised as an only child and around people I am often like a child seeking approval.
I used to self-medicate with alcohol, which worked on this problem but created other, and worse, problems.
P.S. I can’t imagine how it would be to live where you are. People have developed their own ways to hide their fears and value themselves.
1 Like
I know what you mean. I even couldn’t share something on social medias, afraid noone would like my content. Honestly, you need to realise most people don’t give a fck. Being nice is a similar thing. I just realised, even if I tried to talk and be nice and be someone likeble, they wouldn’t like me anyway. So this year, I went to a new school and I decided not to give a fck. I got short cut, purple hair, wore make up if I wanted, or not if I didn’t. I mean, you can never be truly yourself in group of people, right? At least, ‘I’ for me means that person who likes to be alone, so…
But I didn’t give a s*it about what they thought. I didn’t smile if I didn’t want to. But I ended laughing with them from time to time anyway. I had a boy tell me I am freak for my hair. I said I don’t care because I wouldn’t want him to be my friend anyway. Other people just respect my weird silent presence lol 
Maybe you could try to challenge yourself, if you are like me with the social media stuff, post things you like from time to time, some photo, wear something you like to school and free your mind a bit…? Anyway good luck
Any day that you learn something new is a great! freaking day ,thank you very much.
I like this idea,
1 Like