I'm really scared trigger warning. Don't read if you're bored of my death talk

Unusual Beliefs
1

I’ll just put it under unusual beliefs LMAO!

I’M SCARED

BUT I have to accept I might die.

I don’t know what I’m meant to do in my last days

I still have so much anxiety Lolololol. Not. Funny.

I really am sad.

2

What makes you think
that you’re going to die?

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I find it uncomfortable to go into the details.

I’m just so sad.

So so sad

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I don’t even know how you’re meant to feel.

Imagine you have one day left to live

But you’re anxiety is so bad you still cannot meet friends :’(((((((

I’m so sad

5

I have suicidal ideation
even when I’m not sad

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6

I’m so sorry to hear that :’(

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7

I can’t even imagine it tbh.

I had suicidal ideation once or twice though.

I just felt
… Empty

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8

I also feel empty,
but in a good way

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9

Oh OK that’s interesting. In what way does it feel good to feel empty?

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10

Empty of thoughts and feelings.
It’s like freedom

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I hope I don’t go to hell for eternity.

■■■■ you schizophrenia

For giving me shitty ideas.

Or ■■■■ religion

I don’t know.

I’m just so angry right now.

I don’t want to die yet

Plus I have to work on my death day.

If it turns out to be true. That I might die.

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12

Voices want me to die.
I told them to wait till
I finish the books
I have started.

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13

Good luck with your books. I hope you get to finish them :))

It’s an exciting process to write books

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No, I don’t mean the book I write.
But the books I read now.
I had a deal with the voices.
I had had such deals many times
before but nothing happened

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15

yea. that is because our illness does not necessarily tell the truth wink wink

16

Hey I get scared once in a while when I hear my voice. It used to happen more on latuda. It was kind of hard to control my thoughts and I would end up focusing on scary thoughts.

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17

Yea. The delusions and voices feel too real man.

18

Confronting your mortality is a good thing. You’re not going to die, but believing you will is going to change your perspective on life and make you more appreciative of everything when you come back to reality

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19

Thanks but I really might haha big sweat smile.

But I know what you mean.

If I don’t die it’s an absolutely amazing blessing

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20

You’re gonna survive. I’ve been in your position a million times, thinking I was going to die. I was obsessed with numbers and dates and thought I would die when those dates came. It never happened. I did set my affairs in order though, so if i did die i’d have nothing to regret.

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