I want to die

I feel horrible I talked about some really bad ■■■■ in therapy today. And I’m really trying not to dissociate. And my ■■■■■■■ parents are home and they’re being so ■■■■■■■ loud and I hate them.

I can’t get this taste out of my mouth I know it’s not real but I’m freaking the ■■■■ out and voices are telling me i should just kill myself. And I ■■■■■■■ hate it I want to die.


Sorry you’re having these issues with your therapy. If I remember correctly you aren’t considering meds at this point, but maybe you could reconsider? In any event, the feeling will pass if you wait a while. That’s really all we can do with bad days, wait for them to end and hope the next bite of dirt is better.


I’d suggest reconsidering your position on meds. It’s got to be better than this.


Personally I think you should be seeing a psychiatrist.


I’d you feel you may listen to the voices or don’t feel safe, please go to the hospital.


Do you have a number for a out of hours psychiatry team? Like my local Crisis Team?

There are other people you can call such as Samaritans if your in the UK.

If all else fails call your local emergency operator, they’d prefer you to get help than unnecessarily suffer.


I’d reconsider going back on meds @Noise.
Hang in there in the meantime.
Don’t hesitate going to the ER if things progress.


I agree with what everyone else is saying,

You should visit an ER or crisis center and see a psychiatrist.

Your experience with them may not be great,

But every doctor is different and it has to be better than sitting around wanting to die.

Please seek help of a MD.


I can’t do the meds they aren’t going to help me right now anyways they ain’t gonna fix this problem. I’m sorry

I’ll just hope for tomorrow thank you.


My problem is I touched on a bad part of trauma. I don’t think even if I was medicated it’d help right now.

I really don’t see the point of a psychiatrist.

I’m as safe as I can be right now I promise if it gets worse I’ll call someone.

I could text my doc but she’s busy probably I’d feel bad about bothering her.

I really dont want meds like I said to others just now I don’t think anything will make this better.

But I’ll try to stay safe I’m sorry.

I’m already seeing a doc I don’t see the purpose of a psychiatrist though especially since I’m not doing meds.

If I get any worse I’ll call my doc. Or a helpline or something.

I’m just tired I’m sorry

Do what you have to do, let the Doc worry about whether or not it’s a bother. She got into this line of work knowing that random calls from patients was part of the job.


Wish you the best @Noise, but you are limiting your options by refusing meds and limiting your treatment options. Your symptoms related to hearing voices, etc are the result of a biological condition, not other factors like trauma or abuse. The issues complicate what you are experiencing and are definitely part of your suffering, but the need for meds to stabilize is critical. Hope you are okay, the other posts are full of excellent advice too. Take care, we are all concerned for your well-being and safety. Sending you prayers and good vibes.


I guess you have a point there. I just feel like such a mess right now my brain feels foggy I think I might have lost some time. I’m sorry I’m rambling. Maybe I can ask her to call me though do you think she’d get mad if I did that?

The talk I had is what made all of this a things I don’t want meds they aren’t going to fix this nobody would be ok with this stable or not in sorry i just cant they can’t I’ll be fine what happened was bad i remeber she hurt me they say ill be ok I’ll be ok I’m sorry I don’t want to be drugs won’t help me cope with what happened I’m sorry voices have always been there but she made them mean im sorry

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No need to apologize, I’m not saying the things you’ve talked about aren’t valid problems. But the voices and othe symptoms related to sz and sza are based in a medical condition that can be treated with the right meds. I understand that you are having a serious problem accepting the idea that meds will help, but it just seems like your attempts to diagnose and treat yourself are not helping you. I’m not trying to tell you that you’re wrong, I obviously can’t force meds or anything else on you. I’m just concerned that if you refuse to show a little more insight into what you’re going through and take the necessary steps to feel better, it might reach a point where you are in danger. I wish you the best and respect you as an individual. But maybe it’s gotten to a point where you have to accept that you need help, trying to get though these issues on your own just isn’t working.