when i read that i thought u meant u weight 80 pounds. which is more than when u worked there.
but i dont think u should be ashamed. most people who were there might not even work there anymore and if they do and they care then who cares about them
@Bowens , I just mean everything about my looks has gone downhill since I worked there. I’ve never been pretty, but I used to be average. I feel less than average by a lot now and that really sucks. I know it’s vain but I can’t help it anyway.
I’m sure you are just as pretty now as you were before you gained the weight. age is something natural…you’ll see they have changed too…don’t worry…it will be fine.
Don’t feel judged if it hasn’t happened yet. Go and say hi to the people you know. Take music and headphones in case you get overwhelmed. Have confidence in who you are. Your size does not define who you are. You are a compassionate, loyal and a kind person and that’s what everyone should value in you. If they are shallow jerks, call me and I’ll take good care of them.
Who cares what other people think, hold your head up high and go to that appointment. Your the only one of you, and your precious in the sight of the creator.
10 years is a long time, I imagine most of the people you worked with probably aren’t even there anymore. And even if there are some recognizable faces, they likely won’t remember you as they see hundreds of patients.
I struggle with people recognizing me after weight gain too. It’s tough but try to focus on being support for your husband. Distract yourself if you have to.
Please don’t feel ashamed. No one has walked in your shoes. You actually have medical reasons for the weight gain (different antipsychotics you’ve been on causing this), so no one has any right to fairly pass judgement on you.
You should also not feel ashamed because you are actively working on the weight gain by diet and exercise (which is more than most people do).
Plus as was mentioned, the employees who are still there that would know you have all aged and likely some have gained weight too.
Ive felt that way before. Im currently about 30kgs heavier than i was most of my adult life. Really wanna get fit again. I feel way more healthy and confident when im slim.
But im sure no one there would care at all if you are a bit curvier after a ten year absence. But i feel ya. I have the same feeling when seeing friends i havent seen since i was skinny.