I just cant win

I had a suicide attempt just now and probably have a hemorrhoid in the head. I cant go to the hospital as 2 days is father’s day and my birthday is on the 7th of july so I don’t want to miss that. I am in a war with demons that I am losing. I hate my life and myself. I feel so disgusted with myself as this is something that could define my future and I’m doing a piss poor job at standing up for myself even though I try my best. I think i’m going to hell or will have to repeat my life a second time because of the possibility that I will kill myself. I know life is hard but it really sucks ass for me now. my main demon just sneered “Life is what you make of it.” she’s put me through so much. i just don’t know what to do about it. i feel like I’ve failed the good people and beings everywhere. its just heartbreaking.

U can never loss the war with the Lord on ur side… And u should probly go to the hospital… If life has become that overwhelming there’s nothing wrong with having someone to help you out… And u hadn’t let anyone down, I’m glad u failed in ur attempt, be strong and prayers are going out for u…

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I’ve done the Christian thing but it didn’t work out.

You’re doing good by posting to us here. You don’t say if you have access to therapy or if you are on med’s. If not you need to get some of that. We’re here to listen to you. You can vent here.

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thank you. yeah i take meds and have a clinic i go to. these demons have made my life hell. they keep calling me names and humiliating me and all that. its evil what they’ve done to me. as someone else said “Schizophrenia is like having multiple nagging wives no one except you can see or hear.” its gone on for 8 months now with this crowd and they are mostly a bunch of new world order favoring jewish supremacists. they bother me when i am sleeping, when i’m on the toilet, when i shower, i never get a break from them watching me. one of my demons keeps saying I’ve got no chance in life and never did and sadly i’m starting to agree with him.

u should probably go to the hospital

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You’re too young to give up completely. Find out what you want in life and go for that, as long as it is reasonable. (Probably not a rock star)

Hey, there is a life and ways to deal with voices that harass you so you can live as peacefully as possible. Don’t give up, don’t believe the voices, they seem real but you know they’re not.

Are you on meds? Maybe try therapy?

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