Well, my illness is hard… I guess I have other disorders than the sz yeap… Comorbidity, is that right? 
… I feel sometimes alone even here… Am always in the pain, low functioning too… I start to think for my case, that some of my pain was because of myself too but yeah, I’ve spent too much time in isolation… I wish I’d recover one day more… Maybe having a partner idk… But idk if its possible… I currently get overwhelmed by the slightest info around me… I can’t even talk almost and often, this is too much for the normies… I really fight now but I realize it will be hard to beat an isolation from 20 years… My ill friends struggle painfully too even without this…
But does so much isolation happens in sz? Or it was me? 
Well, I have negatives since kid so I know the best how some things were impossible for me before…
For my future, idk anymore…
And you, are you isolated too? Yeap… As I said, my sister called me a zombie once… She never saw a personality behind of how I look. And I look bad with my illness… Always weak and the rest… Not able even to sit on a coffee outside lol… Whatever…
Never mind your sister’s analysis. Isolation is the result of having been hurt. What happens is we forget the original cause and then can’t explain ourselves. And we tend to be forced into apologizing for ourselves. I hope you can relax enough and be secure enough to uncover the original cause.
Thanks 
Yeap, currently I try to catch myself that my fate is in my hands now, not in others… Sometimes still I can get bitter or desperate. Or destroyed by too crazy symptoms or just by the shock of the loneliness. But maybe this is a step forward now
But yeap, my ill friends irl never isolated, idk what I have to be like this…
Don’t apologize. You have been hurt like you don’t know and are afraid of people.
I don’t want to be too intrusive, but you might think about a group home or an assisted living center for the mentally ill. Social isolation is very common in schizophrenia. If you were in an institution you’d have a fair amount of control of how many people you have to deal with. If you do go that route, shop around. Routines vary from place to place. One place I stayed at for about three hours they kept the residents in group until 5:00 pm. They went to town once a month. In the place I am now, we stay until 3:00, and we go to town once a week. This is just a passing thought, but it sounds to me like you’re in a lot of pain. You might think about it.
Tbh, I am tired of institutions… I also am scared to see more dramas… Maybe I sound bad but I get worse around tragedies… Why do I look so much in pain? Maybe I am dumb to be so honest with my situation… I tend to get ragy only when comparing my dad to the others dads… And still, my mother claims its not a trauma what I have, but genetics… Idk
You are coming on here and chatting some, so you aren’t totally isolated now. I too had serious isolation issues for long time and couldn’t talk. Try not to hold that against yourself. I do that too, but we have to let go of it eventually. It can be painful to look back though and think what all could have been.
I’m isolated and the people who try to enter my life just wants to use me for sex. It is lonely I get depressed alot especially around my period. Somedays I wish I wasnt here and then some days I feel alright enough to keep fighting it’s a daily struggle. I dream about having a job and a normal life something to keep me busy. But I’m always reminded of how I failed and how hard it was working while sick and how bad off I got. It’s hard somedays I can think brighter this is not really one of those days it’s tough. I just want to sleep it off. Rushed home just to take my medicine. Anyways your not alone at least.
Acceptance is the first step on the path to healing. It is good to be honest with yourself about your limitations, even though it feels lousy to say, “Yes, I isolate myself because of my illness.” Do what you need to do. If you can’t handle stimulation, live a low-stimulation lifestyle and own it. Your sister’s opinions are hers and hers alone. Just do you.
Thanks sleepy in fact I knew only the illness since very early, since kid, so I rage still, but I’ll try to calm down this too… Go better fast you too!
Oh, thanks!!! Thanks for the message 
… Yeap, I am ill, I have to accept it. And its probably ugly here now… But yeah, my brain is a mess for now. Maybe I’ll be happier in the future. Strange thing to be ill since kid though…
I wish you plenty of peace and healing for 2020 @Anna1!
Thanks wave, you too! Many joy and happiness in the new year!!!
@Anna1, what you have to accept is that you will never recover a 100%.
But none of us will. You have to accept that you probably will never have a full life. But chances are that none of us will.
BUT… there are still things you can do. I don’t know what those things are but maybe people can give you suggestions from their own experience and suffering if you ask.
Having schizophrenia means a lot of compromising. And I should add here that you may be a victim of a common mistake that many people fall for. Lots of people live their lives wanting to do great things and make positive changes but they are always waiting for “the right time”. If anyone bases their life on waiting for that perfect time to do things you are likely going to be sorely disappointed the majority of the time. It’s a little like they used to tell me in AA, “The best time to go to a meeting is when you don’t feel like it.” So in other words you may have to do something in your life that every fiber in your body is telling you that you don’t want to do it but that is the best time.
If you want to change your life it’s going to be uncomfortable and it means doing stuff you don’t feel like doing. You might even have to do stuff you hate or stuff you think is pointless. But in the long run. it can help you.
Some of it may be easy, some of it may be hard. But that’s how you grow in life. You may have to make changes which a lot of us hate or are afraid of.
But you have to start somewhere. Success ain’t going to come knocking at your door. you have to make the initial changes to help yourself but fortunately there are people out there who want to help you with this.
People on here would offer support and advice in this area. You won’t have a full perfect life but you can certainly make some kind of small changes, you can add several small things to your life and see how it goes.
A lot of us had that one special person who saw something in us that we didn’t see in ourselves and they had faith in us and pointed it out and helped us achieve something.
Personally, I didn’t think about working much when I got out of the hospital after 8 months. I had no plans to go back to work but counselors saw potential in me and after a series of small steps I eventually became employed and I still am.
You might not have that person ( or persons) in your life right now but you never know, if you get out there a little and do a few things you might eventually run into someone like that.
But yeah, you may never get as much out of life as you think you should but you can still add things to your current life.
But everything is a risk, just getting out of bed in the morning is a risk, lol. But there’s something called a calculated risk. Do something new that you know you will probably succeed at and give it a shot. And once you accomplish that you can build on it. So I hoped this helped a little but. None of us are perfect but we all have our good points and our strengths (and weaknesses). We all have our cross to bear, but I find after 58 years that most people have potential. But like I said change can be painful and uncomfortable but it can really pay off in a positive way.
Yeah, but unfortunately, I am too paranoid sometimes… I try not to ‘‘wait’’ anymore, but it happens… I just wonder if I can get out of my isolation faster than I think? Guys, I was isolated for twenty years, I am afraid it will take me another decade to get out of it… Or no? Whats your opinion? The aps make me dumber too tbh… And in my illness, there is my intellectual deficits of which I am very aware so I am scared of the others on that…
I talk not about recovery, but about a bit of more remission, you know… To just be able to talk to my ill friend on the phone in the evening, not avoid… I make more things now, that I fight, but I am still very often quite alone…I wonder if there can be a faster remission no matter, that I was ill and isolated for twenty years? Or it wont happen soon?
Happy new year also, love ya all!!!
IDK @Anna1,
It reminds me of an old Chinese saying: “The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.”
If you could just do just some simple step towards getting out of isolation. Just at least one or two things. Right now is a good time to start.
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