My life could’ve turned out so much worse. I’m one of the lucky ones.
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That’s true. We could be so much worse. We should be grateful
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I just heard a story on the radio about a guy who was diagnosed with a brain tumor and found out he had it from birth. It stunted his growth. He was able to be a famous skater because of it. Idk If it was skateboarding or ice skating. I used to be really really down on my self, and live in a pity party for about 15 years. Now I embrace my limitations and expect that God will and does to use it so I can do what he wants me to do with life. That’s just my personal perspective on it. So, I agree with you, my situation could be a lot worse.
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Exactly, yes. Like, why am I sitting here having such a hard time when I have it better than most of the world? Fortunately I’m intelligent, which hopefully means I can push past my issues and do something great for the world.
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I don’t want to get into my theories about God, but what you’re saying makes sense. I believe that I have the capacity to change the world for the better. I don’t know if God gave me mentall illness, or if it was just random chance, but I need to come to terms with the fact that I am/have been ill. I don’t feel sorry for myself. Honestly I feel guilty because my life is better than most.
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Your future’s bright @Sardonic . Keep taking the meds and keep being 100% honest with your doctors.
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@Sardonic
What are some goals that you have?
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its a hard question and i’m sure we have all asked it at one point or another ‘why me?’ or ‘why did i have to get ill’ i guess some people look to blame something for it,
for me though, i dont blame myself although sometimes i think that way but i try to look past those thoughts and look at ‘the bigger picture’
I’m sure there are reasons why one person is more fortunate in life than others and i try to think of these reasons sometimes but it is best not to dwell on them.
i’ve been told that we are being tested and this is very hard bc i think well why was i chosen to be tested in this way, and who is doing the testing?
tbh i am still looking for answers but there are others who are worse and i think we should all say a little prayer for them especially at this time of year because Christmas can be so hard to deal with.
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Honestly may need your mentality on things because lately the real reality check on things well is more ■■■■■■ then I could imagine.
@everhopeful: Thank you. Sometimes I lose faith in myself and my ability to function, but I’ve got to keep going. I truly believe I can change the world provided I get past my issues. Also, I’m done lying to my doctors. I can’t keep obeying my mom when she tells me to lie/hide stuff. Lying to and withholding information from my doctors doesn’t get me anywhere.
@FlyingPurplePeopleMeeter: I guess my biggest goal is to start college. I’ll be taking one class at a community college to test the waters before I go to a 4-year college. I suppose another is to start going to the gym and getting some exercise. I just don’t want to do much of anything. My motivation is at an all time low. I just lay in bed and use my phone all day. I’ve been thinking about joining a board game club, maybe to get myself out of the house and get past my lack of desire to socialize with people in person. It’s much easier to socialize online and/or through text.
@daydreamer: I’m still looking for answers too. I always feel like there’s more to my affliction, but like you said, it’s best not to dwell on it. I suppose the “why” doesn’t really matter anyway. I’m not so good at praying, but I believe that God knows my heart. But I do hope everyone’s tomorrow is better than today.
@ChrisJack: I’m sorry but I don’t understand what you’re saying.
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You shouldn’t feel bad for struggling. You have a legitimately difficult illness to deal with. While it is true that things can always be worse, give yourself a break, too. Like @everhopeful said, keep taking your meds and working with your pdoc and hopefully things will get better and better for you.
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I suppose it doesn’t make sense to feel guilty. Like, just because someone is suffering more doesn’t mean I’m not suffering too. My suffering has been lessened by medication. I am grateful, but also sad for all those whose suffering remains immense. I do still feel bad, but I must keep going. I guess life is hard for all of us in some way or another.
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@Sardonic
You’re going through a lot. It’s understandable that there isn’t much room in your mind to socialize with other people. A gym is a great place to start. College would be awesome.
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It’s not so bad. My brain will do what it does, generating psychotic ideas and voices. Still, if I hope to do anything with my life I need to work on my motivation. The voices aren’t as big of a problem right now as my lack of drive. I have mixed feelings on whether or not I want the voices to go away. My mom thinks it would be best if they went, but my doctors don’t want to drug me into oblivion. They want ke to be able to be as stable as I can while still maintaining a decent level of functioning. Anyway, I guess I’ll have to bug my mom about joining a gym.
I hope you can join the gym. It’s great!
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Yeah me too. It will be hard to motivate myself, but I’m badly out of shape. My heart beats fast from walking up the stairs sometimes. Plus I don’t want to gain too mch weight on seroquel.
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You know what its really what you say makes you happy. So inner joy is so important. Not monetary!!!. I hate money but do use it. I am disgusted by it atm. It makes me grossed out. I even have pain associtaed with it going back to childhood. My fam split bc my dad loved money. My ex loved money. My hubs loves money.
Greed?.
Dude if I didn’t have kids id be living in a cabin in the woods away from anything having to do with it. It really breaks my heart. One day I’ll really just take up that cross and just live in a forest and just live off nature and make kambucha and yogurt from goats milk lol.
Yea my inner hippy self need to connect
I don’t really have a problem with money itself. I have a problem with the lengths some people will go to to make money. I don’t think I have anything that makes me truly happy. Maybe that’s part of my problem.
I used to feel bad about struggling too, especially because my partner has had to pick up some slack over the past few months. However, i’m giving myself a break. It is hard for me to do some things due to avolition. However, i never stop trying to do better. It takes a lot of energy sometimes but i continue trying. You’ve come a long way from where you were previously before you were honest with your pdoc. Continue to be honest and take your medication, and you should be able to have an impact on life in a positive way.
I feel it i have kids. That helps a lot. Lol have lots of em if my hubs wasn’t against me being a baby factory. I suffer from schizophrenia with extreme delusion and paranioa. Love, it’ll make you happy. And dont let it slip through ur fingers you only get one chance in this lifetime. She’ll come around or he… But just don’t allow your illness to break it. Just love and be grateful and want to be good that helps too. We all have darkness especially us select few. But we gotta really say b the all we can b for ourselves.
I see greatness in others but in me I h8 myself. Love see him in everything bc im retarded I lost that childish light. But gosh man he was it. You have a chance if you haven’t lost it. Go find that and don’t settle you’ll end up spending a lot of time crying over a guy who h8s you half the time bc you are nothing like him. I got with my hubby after a breakup and I have 3 kids but we have nothing in common.
He’s more glad to be away from me. I’m schizophrenic don’t blame him lol. But even the little things like brain food. He is a positive and I am with him nomatter how sad he makes me. No matter how bad things get bc my kids. They are the lights of my life. Noe when I’m feeling back in my zone again.
I’ll be happy again just takes some work. I like to run N go to this mountain or hill near where I live and just sit there early in the morning ALONE lol. It’s hard with 3 kids but I think my sign has to do with it I’m a Sagittarius and when I feel off running just helps so much. It just recently got so bad I feel like I lost my wings.
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