My experience was okay but it could have been better considering I did get shame for being poor and got made fun of for not having a car as a teenager due to being poor.
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Honestly, it was pretty good.
Canât say too much, but for the time being, the best 4 years of my life.
But I stopped contact with everyone I knew.
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I was the biggest loner there since elementry school haha. I barely remember my life prior to developing schizo at 21-22 years old in college in 2011. Looking back, I probably was always schizoid in a way since I was born but didnât notice I was a loner/bullied until elementry school or public elementry school. My parents (dad) isolated me. I felt disconnected or dissociated from reality back then and itâs not real to me anymore.
In high school, I was autistic looking or probably was in a wayâŚbouncing off the walls to boredom trying to fight in because I had morals and good behavior in a way. My mom (despite getting mad and denying it and getting triggered) never did me any favors in life â probably-- and my step-father I hated until mid illness when he tried being nice to me. I mean the man never said âhappy birthday to meâ or âbought me anyhtingâ because I wasnât his biological kid/son. I mean my mom had to beg him to say âhappy birthday to meâ and my family is just messed up and fake despite putting on the evangelical Christian front, which is probably why I rebelled and became an Atheist. My dad was probably worse to me, but heâs my biological father and blood so I always loved him despite him abusing me. He never neglected me until 15-16 years old when I was kicked out of the house and moved to moms house and changed schools. My dad is addicted to pain pills due to back painâŚand he â â â â â â â at my schizophrenia and takes no responsibility for his abusive behavior. I did feel like a sore loser or red-headed stepchild in the family, but my step-brother was worse according to my sister and momâŚoh wellâŚwe all got issuesâŚ
I was bullied by my physics teacher in high school and probably DID deserve to fail that physics class. I mean I didnât learning anything at all and never showed up despite being nice and following the rulesâŚit still traumatizes me to this dayâŚwhere I probably over compensate.
I mainly remember playing WoW for 15 hours a day every day and MOHAA and Battlefield and going on digg and reddit and stuff.
I never did âdrugsâ in school but looked liked I did because I had mental health issues and did seem schizoid/autistic or something. I thought I might have had ADHD/ADD but never got treatment. I always felt like I lived in a low class/ghetto area, but thatâs just me.
If I had money, I would have moved to NewPort Beach or the Beach or even left california to move to NYC or Paris even or New England because I was stuck up and snobby, I guess. I had my nose in the air I was toldâŚ
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I was smart enough to be automatically put in AP /honors courses and barely passed high school despite being a loser/loner/not trying at all. I never qualified for Gate or honors programs but probably didnât try. I scored really low on PSAT and failed my AP exam (history?) and was good at computers and was middle class living with my dad (working class).
I was probably smarer than I looked at the time haha.
I got 50s on ASVAB though. I was impressed with myself haha.
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I was unhappy a lot and basically invisible for four years. I didnât talk to anyone in my classes and just talked to my friends. I had my moments but I doubt anyone remembers me and if some people actually remembered me they would say I was weird.
That said, I did do one extracurricular thing. I went out for the school soccer team in 11th grade. Me and three friends all went out for the team and they all quit before they played even one game, I was the only one who stuck it out.
The first two years of high school I hung out at the back of the school where no one was, just me and three other guys. Those other guys were known and had reputations but I guess they had problems if they were hanging out back there with me.
I started drinking in 9th grade and smoking pot in 10th grade and I went to a few parties and mingled with the popular crowd. By the end of 11th grade I was hanging out on âthe fieldâ where the stoners smoked cigarettes and pot. By 12th grade I was smoking pot at school and dealing with a friend; we just sold mostly dime bags and joints.
The best times were cutting school, I missed so much school! Me and my friend would skip a couple of classes or the whole day and walk back to his house and smoke a ton of pot because his mom was at work and nobody was home. I was skipping classes or a whole day on a weekly basis for months and months. The school would send letters to my parents about me missing so much school but I would intercept the letters in the mail and rip them up before my parents could read them.
It all came to a head one day when I skipped school with my friend and we both took acid. We were at his house all day tripping and then my mom called. That was the first and last time she ever called my friends house. She told me to get home NOW. I was still high but I went home. What happened was I had missed a letter from school and let it slip through and my parents read it and discovered I had been cutting school for months. They had me sit on the couch in front of them and confronted me and gave me a huge lecture and asked me what I thought I was doing with myself. I was just trying to hide the fact I was high as a kite and said little as possible. I think we talked for 30 minutes, maybe more, and it was a huge deal.
I was in big trouble and they warned me I better shape up or they would do something bad. It was pretty ominous. I somehow got through the lecture without them knowing I was on acid.
I still smoked pot though and some people at school knew me and I partied with popular people. I still barely talked in classes though.
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UK here. I went to a special needs school, in that school they didnât do GCSEâs or any qualifications to be honest. But I loved that school. There was only 3 other children in my class and it was more field experience so to speak, we went on outings in the community in the teachers car, to the cinema etc⌠One of my biggest regrets is at 14 years old watching James Bond instead of Six Sense, would be 1999.
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I had similar experience. At 14 me and my girlfriend took loads of morphine tablets and amphetamine while living in this childrenâs home. We started tripping really bad. Next day my fosters parents visited me (who I desperately wanted to move back with) I was disoriented and shaking when they visited me the next morning from the night before drugs. I was messed up. Thankfully they took me back as that childrenâs home was awful.
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Well, I graduated in 2007. Itâs irrelevant now. I donât think about it but still fear taking physics. My family is not good at math and neither was I until I tried, studied, and went to get help. Same thing with writing in college.
I had overall a good community college experience, but had a negative bad trip in college â my own fault. University was just too hard and I switched majors from economics to math because I felt math was more challenging and better for PHD preparation and worth paying the money for math to learn something.
I mean my grades sucked to me and I struggled every day and hated it. I ended up dropping out due to my schizophrenia though. I would have graduated if I didnât develop schizophrenia my senior year. My family also (dad) refused to co-sign loans, so I funded it myself with FAFSA and student loans. Theyâre all paid off.
Iâm still convinced I was mk ultraâd, but nobody cares and especially nobody believes it. Maybe itâs not real, but my memories arenât real either. Itâs like I remember stuff from past lives or parallel universes and stuff that ainât real anymore.
I started at intermediate algebra and elementry English in college rofl.
I can remember most if not all my past lives (MWT of QM/Quantum Immortality) like a time loop and I guess theyâre called parallel universes or worldlines.
Iâm an alien abductee and experienced other things in my past lives including what I believe to be monarch, montauk, and the secret space program to the point where I think I got cloned in 2011 by aliens or something or the government/Illuminati. I have paranoia about it. Iâm convinced I reincarnate and itâs like eternal return/eternal recurrence to me â especially my past before I reincarnate for eternity/infinity.
Thereâs no money or help and I feel like I got roadblocks to education and work to the point I have given upâeven coursera and edx because of my shame and humiliation and guilt of my delusions/conspiracy theories.
I convinced myself I was John Titor and Satoshi Nakamoto but was told itâs insane and not real and stuff. Theyâre just delusions, I guess. I âhallucinate stuffâ which I think are my past lives at night when I sleep like men in black which I think are grey aliens or robots or shapeshifters lol.
I over share and am definitely my own worst enemy in life.
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High school was a misery to me, in spite of its bright spots. Anxiety came down on me hard my sophmore year in high school. I was stoned on weed much of the time, but my drug of choice was alcohol. I donât think I was the only one suffering in high school. Lots of kids suffer throughout their high school experience. Then I joined the army, and it gave me the ability to get alcohol almost at will. When I was in Germany in the Army you could get a 40 oz. bottle of Barcardi Rum for $2,90. Lots of young men reacted the way I did when they first got to Germany. We swilled that alcohol with a will. They ought to give the alcoholics in the army a disability pension, except that it would bankrupt the country if we gave all the people who became an alcoholic a disability pension. We also had problems with heroin at that time in the Army, and I honestly think alcohol was a bigger problem than heroin.
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That is now every expensive to purchase now in Europe.
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I didnt have a car as a teenager. My parents didnt see any reason a teenager needed their own car. Had nothing to do with money.
I rode a hideous bright orange Schwinn bike five miles each way to high school. Also rode it to my job at a local pizza parlor. My dad would pick me and my bike up after I was done with work because it was dark and not safe to ride 5 miles home in the dark. I was in pretty good shape because of all the bike riding.
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I donât really think about high school that much these days. A lot of people I went to school with would probably describe me as âniceâ and âvery quiet.â
I think I showed early signs of sz in my adolescence. I would get depressed a lot and alienate with just me in my room smoking weed and listening to music.
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I have honestly never had a job! I canât relate to working people. But I make my job credentials up when abroad as Iâm embarrassed about not working.
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High school was decent times.
I hung out with a good amount of people and did alright academically.
But something was already off with meâ I would go through these periods where Iâd isolate and stop answering my cell phone. Then Iâd have periods where I was clearly hypomanic. So yea, the mood stuff was already happening by that point.
I ended up getting ill my last year of college, so there was still a little time left.
Overall though, it was an alright experience.
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@Anthony1337 Please familiarize yourself with the forum guidelines. Youâre posting about topics that violate forum guidelines.
Here are the complete forum guidelines
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How did you find that old footage of me? 
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When you said your ride was âhideousâ, I thought of the Wizard of Ozâs Witch. 
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Now Iâm humming the Oz bicycle witch music in my head
Da-dun-da-dun-da-da-dun
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