I can’t ■■■■■■■ stand it it’s so chaotic, so delusional. The messages just never stop.
There is no forseeable way to fix this. I’m just at a total loss. All it does is piss me off. There is no help in the world. Can’t help but believe I’m a thought broadcaster. Can’t help but try and process that unreality. Sometimes people say things that confirm it. Maybe they are just intuitive or ■■■■■■■ with me. I’m such a waste. There is nothing I can do. I can’t live like this. I don’t know how to end it, but I want to die every day. Everyone is so much better than me. So at peace so solid. I was never solid even before I got sick. Had a friend bring up a memory and say that she still remembers that person. I’ve fallen so far. I can’t do anything but isolate myself and spin in madness. I wish death was celebrated and not feared. Release from life. I can’t find peace, I’m searching for it but I can’t find it. " don’t kill yourself were just ■■■■■■■ with you" well it makes life not worth living. Back to silence boredom and isolation,
Are you takn meds? It seems like your very sympthomatic. If your taking them regulary then you should go back to your pdoc and tell him/her you want to try something new , if your not taking them regulary then i think you should start
Yeah something’s definitely not working. My pdoc has been hesitant to change my meds. My house is practically like a hospital. No pros here but it’s basically a room I’m stuck inside all day. I am symptomatic as always just sometimes I have the wherewithal to stand and other times it becomes the most infuriating circumstance that I can imagine being in.
it’s not real hunni…i promise you it’s not. there will be quiet times and busy times. you just have to try and sail through the rough times as best you can. i haven’t found a med that works but that doesn’t mean you won’t/ experiment with different meds and see what happens. what have you got to lose? nothing, except voices. if that doesn’t work, try going into hospital and have electro convulsive therapy. it makes you feel like ■■■■ the day you have it but it stops voices dead, ask surprisedj about it. it’s not a lobotomy or anything, just a gentle electric shock across the temporal lobes and you’re out or sedated for it anyway. try it and see. or the gentler form of it, transcranial stimulation. you have to be proactive. do not give up ok? you can do this. remember what i said before, if you and i were in the same room you’d be hearing my voice but i know i’m not talking to you right? so it would have to be your brain producing it, so it’s the same with all your friends and family. it’s not real, i promise. much love, jayne
hang in there things will get better.
how do we live with it? just keep going. sending hugsx
Trying to send you the very best positive vibes I can. From what I’ve seen you post over time, I think you are a smart, good-hearted person with a lot to offer the world. I hope you can hold onto that and not drown in the negatives of this stupid illness. Please please PLEASE ask your doc for a med change or some sort of intervention if this continues. You shouldn’t have to suffer like this.
Hugs from up north. 
10-96
Well, if I say have faith in God and rely by that faith in the power of Jesus and the angels, it will only work if you actually believe and follow through…in my case it works.
As far as messages never stopping, depends on the messages. I’ve absolutely loved some of mine and the ones i didn’t I still worked with…wrote them down, had come backs for them, created my own and played with the speakers of the messages… it takes some effort, sometimes a LOT of effort, but it puts the message speakers in their place and eventually quiets them.
Hey Bryan~
Afew days late on this-I know–but hope you`re doing a better tonight.
I am very much in agreement with Pixel.
See your doc as soon as possible and get a med adjustment.
Much loveOO
At least it doesn’t put you in a state of fear. Fight of Flight responses are all extreme though.
We’ve all been there. The best we can do is continue to hold hope for improvement. Scientific advances are being made every day to improve this. And we can try to hold on to little positive things that happen to us every day and use them to ride us through the worst of it. You’re fighting very hard to maintain lucidity and to give it up and play along with the delusion now would waste all of that progress you’ve made. You can do this!!
hang in there, i’m struggling at the moment too…my ocd which i thought i had a cap on just went beserk on me…fun times.
you get used to the madness, if i could take on your pain i would, there are good days, remember that…
take care 