I get really bad headaches from caffeine withdraw or from energy drink crashes, but Vraylar helps me.
I am going to try and post ‘more positive’ things and stuff from now on and perhaps delete some of my old posts here that " I don’t approve of anymore or don’t like".
Every time I get a headache or think about ‘what happened to me’ I think of negative things like my panic and anxiety go up and I think I was tortured, but probably wasn’t.
It feels like an Alien Illuminati or some crap. I don’t know what I did but I think I posted I was Satoshi Nakamoto back in 2011 on Facebook and now my mind keeps thinking weird stuff like I posted weird things like I went to mars, time traveled, went to a parallel universe via a wormhole, and experienced trauma. Stuff I rather not talk about or go into deep detail anymore…
I also remember thinking we lived in a computer simulation and the world ended in 2011/2012 but that is fiction I guess. I was just a dumb high school student but I ‘changed the world’ on accident. Maybe some God given abilities were given to me, but now I’m so messed up with schizophrenia, every thought and feeling feels like a hallucination, even though I deny I do that.
I even thought I was John Titor but realized that is not real or a hoax or fake, but I believe it so much it’s practically in my DNA now. I hope to recover some day.
I thought I was in the Montauk Project and SSP and went through Monarch stuff, but I can’t trust my mind anymore. I think aliens do it to people and some evil people too.
I still cannot ‘visualize’ my life before schizophrenia but I heard that’s common with schizophrenia. Basically, I have schizophrenia from my belief(s) I created or invented Bitcoin…but I feel like I’m re-living my life as a paranoid schizophrenic for eternity and periodically going to other lives or worlds via soul and consciousness travel (time travel). Maybe I’m not really a clone or a drone or an alien or a cyborg/robot, but those are just really bad delusions. I need to stay away from conspiracy theory crap from now on.
I watch a lot of youtube videos on X Files and realize that stuff isn’t real sometimes, it’s fiction, made up by hollywood, but the whole ‘fake alien abduction’ thing feels real and the whole ‘global fascism’ agenda feels real too…!
The most important thing is I have no money or anything. But I feel like I was or am a super soldier but don’t know or care anymore really. Just trying to survive and live life, I guess.
Sometimes I feel like I posted random things and false or implanted memories and was made to forget what I posted. I do remember August 27th 2011 but I went to wikipedia and that happened in 2017. Even though I wasn’t there, there’s a quantum probability I was there during the Occupy movement and the ‘2017 Protests’ but in a past life/parallel universe/different reality/different simulation type of thing. I get downloads or memories of being there and experiencing trauma. I won’t be EVER going back to that school. I often compare it to ground hog day or Edge of Tomorrow or Source Code or even Butterfly Effect, really. Maybe Butterfly Effect…where I can loop back in time and change my fate or even destiny, but I cannot change my history or mental illness since 2011.
So my memories aren’t real, but I relive them and the trauma when I dream or sleep…
I’m glad I have that insight from now on, but I am experiencing inter-dimensional time travel now. I also experience stuff like Illuminati crap which is done by aliens, I think.
I often feel like I’m the original super soldier or most powerful super soldier out there, but it’s just not real/true at all. I watch a lot of TV and fictional stuff and think it’s real.
I also see the quantum probabilities on paper that I may have drawn in a past life and seeing how they wiggle around like string theory and how I am going to different ‘dots’ or quantum states through time and universes.
I feel like I lived billion+ past lives and am immortal in a way/sense. This is a computer program/simulation. I am experiencing consciousness transfer and remember my past quantum lives. I always have schizophrenia, I guess. and I always loop back to 2011 or even 2012 or 2013 at the latest back in time.
–
According to string theory and MWT, all possible realities or quantum states are possible. So, I think I’ve been to two distinct and only two different exclusive realities and I’m in hell, really. I have delusions I’ve been to a reality where the 2016 election was different and this life is much much better and simpler and happier. Like I remember going back in time and seeing the 2016 election be different or change: Hillary won. I also remember other stuff, but will ignore these thoughts. Maybe not all of it is real or something.
I think that’s ALL I have to say. Thank you.
I think I’m a perpetual victim of trauma based mind control…stuff I don’t comprehend or understand anymore or claim to accept. I just want help and I want to get better…Thank You!