I’m not sure what is going on, but since mid-summer I can’t see the world the way I use to. The news seems fake, I’ve read so much now about our history and it isn’t the same as what I was taught in school. From 9/11 to ISIS to Hillary and Trump to the weather. It is all just not real anymore. I can’t even watch TV shows without dissecting the fact that cameras are coming the actors or the laughing is totally fake or the fact that an actors hair or button down shirt changes during each scene. I wake up each morning with next February 1st as my last day. I can’t see the future after that. I just know it is going to be my time by someone else’s hand or my own. Over the past months I gave up on the notion of God or even the Paranormal (which I have been so much involved in). I don’t believe in anything anymore. I just crave something to believe in, but I really seriously do think after all these psychotic years, that I have really just given up. I’ve got one kid left in high school, then I’m done. I can’t even get a cashier’s job at my supermarket even though I’ve been through university, been an IT manager, web designer and so on. Honestly with all the wars, bombings, government intrusions in our lives, just what is the point on going further?
Well there is always a reason to go further. You have a family it sounds like.
Believe in yourself, believe in what you can achieve and do achieve. Set personal goals and strive for them. I know i sound like a motivational speaker but there are people that may be worse off than you. People have their highs and lows. Hang in there.
I don’t mean to be drab. I have no family, other than my mother. I live with my mother. I am in the worst state of mind i’ve been in my life. I just keep on chuckin along.
Thx for responding. I do have a family. Three kids, with the youngest left in high school. I can’t explain it. Nothing seems real anymore. I can’t get the smallest job even though I have years of professional experience. I pray to God and he never answers. I pray to my recently deceased brother and sister who both died from alcohol within 9 months of each other, but there is no answer. My home is silent when I am alone even though I ask for just the slightest reply from the other side. I’m just tired of being woken up by voices and nothing is there. Things just suck. I can barely drive my car anymore in the slightest bit of traffic as I go into a panic attack. ■■■■.
Trust me I know. I remember waking up literally multiple times feeling like someone was shaking me in my bed. But it was the vocies. I didn’t even know that could happen.
Do you give Plasma? I know going to the Plasma center all schizo is hell sometimes. But it’s a few $ in your pocket.
I haven’t worked since 2008, don’t have a license till 2026, have no car, no life right now. I feel like loser for saying all this. Find things to occupy your time. Who cares about world events? Do they directly concern you right now? To me they don’t. There is nothing I physically can do to change the outcome of previous world events or ongoing events.
Any hobbies?
No, I don’t give plasma. My sister did and almost lost her arm to an infection after giving it, so that pretty much scared me off. As for current events, I’ve always paid attention to news since the Iran hostage situation captivated my attention. I’m well traveled throughout Europe and Asia, so other cultures are very important to me to keep up on. I hate it though sometimes, my crazy thinking about it. As for hobbies, I’ve been a Paranormal Investigator for years, but now I suddenly don’t believe anymore. No more interests in anything.
Any friends? I sure dont have any lately.
Family friends or FB friends, but nobody I can realistically talk to without being judged.
Are you currently psychiatrist? You might find seeing one helpful.
Personally, I’m a skeptic, so I don’t believe in much. I take pleasure in deconstructing different beliefs and showing the holes in them. If you can’t believe in anything, believe in doubt. Believe you can dismantle any belief. There are a few core values I believe in - like the value of life, the evil of unnecessary suffering, the greatest good for the greatest number, and so on, but even these beliefs can often be dismantled in their application to specific situations. For example, we are destroying life by bombing ISIS, but more people are likely to die if ISIS goes unchecked, so it is necessary to destroy life by bombing ISIS. Believe in your own reason. Believe you can be a moral agent. Circumstances will usually comprimize most belief systems. If humanity survives and prevails, it will be in spite of what we believe, not because of it.
Have you tried buspon?its really good drug for depression and stress.
Life is beautiful. You have a family. Your life is valuable and you are needed. Do not lose hope.
Sometimes it can be cathartic to let yourself feel all the bad feelings fully, even hopelessness. Music may help you feel.
I hope your situation improves.
For me personally it fits best rellying on the comfort of the unknown. I dont really need to believe in anything. Also I feel like every thought that is an assumption without any reality ground is highly unlikely to be true and Im very suspicious of those that claim to know truths about things that are really in the unknown.
Not believing in anything can be quite comforting.
Best of luck.
I recommend you two things. Helps me when I loose the sense of being.
- plug out the TV. And computer. And phone.
- take a walk somewhere where nature is beautiful and silent. Like woods or seashores.
If you take a moment to appreciate the beauty of all the natural and perfect chaos, you’ll see that Life transcends all the politics and crazy conspiracies. Just let your brain breathe for a while man.
I can only concur. I remember when I felt like you describe and I can only say to hold on and keep on going. I was lost, so lost, but I faught and came back to reality and was able to feel again, to laugh and smile. But when I was really down, I found comfort i what I knew was real, what I could feel and touch; the wind in my hair, the rain on my skin. I took long walks in the woods and touched the trees, smelled the air. I would lay on the ground and feel the grass under my hands. It sounds like something out of Romaticism, which it may be (some of my favourite literature 
) but it really helped me. Good luck!
take care 
Have you ever seen anyone eating cakes and being sad? No! So there.
i 'm hungry now 
take care
I have to believe in my personality. It has been with me all my life. I also believe in my intellect. This illness is something to believe in, something to find out about, to undergo-a constant. Although not certain these days, the seasons are something to believe in. The passage of time in general-day to day, hour to hour. Death, although we don’t know it until it happens, is something to believe in.
Yeah nothing has felt real in a long long time
Take care
Have you ever read ‘What color is your parachute?’
My mom got it for me the other day and it has all sorts of stuff on how to use sites like linkedin to find jobs and how employers are looking for people these days.
Do you have a pet? You should get a dog if you need love. Make sure you are the one to feed it and take absolute care of it for at least the first six months. That’s what my mom did with Tink and now as far as Tink is concerned my mom is a goddess. She follows her everywhere. The rest of us could die in a fire, but if mom’s ok, all’s good. 