I never wanted kids. Is that why I never wanted to get married I wonder ? 
It must be quite easy to get married if you both want kids.
Another thing that may have stopped me is I’ve always believed marriage was forever and so the other person would have to have been perfect I guess.
But Ive always wondered why/how others get married so easily.
I don’t think the other person has to necessarily be perfect. Probably just a good fit.
IDK, I think of marriage as the apex of anyone’s social accomplishments. After that you have the endgame of losing touch with all your friends and sometimes family, and maybe raising a family or waiting for things to fall apart. So I guess it really is an endgame, after that things seem to change socially. Problems can arise when one or both partners try to fight that change or demand that certain aspects of their relationship remain in stasis. I don’t know firsthand, not having been married, but this is what I’ve observed in my own family and their relationships, my parents and so on.
It seems to take a lot of emotional maturity and acceptance to make this sort of relationship work.
Getting married didn’t really change my relationship at all. I think having kids might, though. Luckily, many of my friends are starting to have kids now, so we will be able to have play dates.
Around to 40 to 50 percent of couples in United States get divorced. And there is probably a lot of couples that stick with an unhappy relationship. There are people who are married and can’t stand their relationship. There are people who are married and live separately.
Many people don’t know what they want for their relationship and life, and they stick with a relationship that makes them unhappy. If they get children, the couple will probably try to stick with the relationship even more.
I’m not saying that marriage makes you unhappy. What I mean is that you need to come from abundance in order to enter in a successful relationship. And even if you come from abundance, there is the possibility of a failed relationship. So happy marriages are rare. It’s easy to get married, but it doesn’t mean you’ll get fulfilled.
Most developed countries around the world promote households to have more children. Developing countries usually already have a huge population and have a family planning policy in place to prevent over population.
It’s rather better for a nation to have a domestic pool of talent rather than hiring immigrants who must integrate into society
Marriage usually involves kids and a majority of normal people get married for this reason.
People get married to quick that’s why the divorce rate is so high. Don’t worry about marriage if it is meant to be it will happen naturally not just a pen and piece of paper ordeal.
The divorce rate is inflated, because a large number of divorces are from people’s second or third marriages. If you exclude the stats of people who have had multiple divorces, the rate of divorce among first-time marriages is much lower. That said, it’s better to have a high divorce rate than for people to stay locked into marriages that aren’t healthy.
East Asians rarely have a second or third marriage. Usually the first marriage with kids are what the couple is devoted to. However, the younger generation of Chinese (born after 1990) are divorcing for financial reasons but with no kids to tie the couple down. Very different marriage culture between East Asian and the West.
This topic really interests me so I hope it’s okay if I just go on a long ramble about it!
Heads up friends I ramble haha
Okay so I’m married. I’m newly married. Less than a year. I’ve been with my partner for 14 years. We were high school sweethearts. We have 2 children. They are 8 (almost) and 5. They’re the raddest kids in the entire world. They melt my damn heart.
I hear a lot of people say that when you have a mental illness it’s just not in the cards for you to have that tradiations family life. But I say ■■■■ that. I think maybe partly do to the fact that I was manic for the majority of my 20s pushed me to do everything early because our friends are just startin to talk about weddings and babies and here our kids are going to be old enough to babysit those kids when they’re finally born lolol
BUT! I did put off our wedding for a very long time because marriage to me is forever and I too thought that meant my partner needed to be perfect or that I did. Legit I even spent a year of my life acting out the day to day life of a 40/50s housewife outfit and all. Like I said…I was manic haha but what I learned wwas that no one needs to be perfect. You just need to understand each other. Care for each other. Know when to push things and know when to give it time. My husband is the most fascinating person I’ve ever met. I used to think it would kill me loving him so much. But him and I just click. I’m crazy and all over the place and he’s grounded. We balance each other out.
Any way I think marriage and kids can be for anyone. Anyone who wants to love and feel loved. It saved my life.
I was never interested in marriage and kids growing up. It was only really when I hit teenage years did I start thinking about boyfriends and marriage. Before all of this, I was always on the fence about kids. I never believed I would be a good mom anyway, so the mental illnesses passing on was more than enough to push me onto the “not having children” side of the fence.
Now I would love to marry my bf someday, but we’ve both agreed kids are a no-go, so I have no reservations about him.
Getting married is easy,
Staying married is difficult.
It has nothing to do with love,
Its about communication.
I loved a lot of jerks,
I’ve only ever had a real partnership with my husband.
I got married when I was young and stupid and thought no one could ever love me so I better not let go of the one guy who said he did even though I didn’t really love much about him. I love him now, with all my heart, likely because he just grew on me and he really is an awesome guy. But if I had it to do over again I don’t know that I would have gotten married so young and whole I was in such a bad place. And then, had I not gotten married when I did, I doubt I ever would since things got really bad not too long after.
I’d like to date and maybe be serious at some point, but I don’t think I want to get married. For one thing, it could affect my SSI Money and food stamps. Gotta eat to live. Also, I don’t want to feel trapped in a bad or deteriorating relationship.
Honestly I’d be pretty surprised if I can even find anyone that wants to go out on a date with me. Let alone that really likes me.
Maybe if I can work the chances are about as good as wining a local raffle.
I think the idea is if there aren’t enough babies being born, eventually you have a situation where there are a lot of elderly people who can’t add that much to the economy and not enough young people who can.
That said I think the impact of people having unwanted children causes much more harm.
Geriatrics & elderly health care is going to be big business. Population pyramids vary with each country.
Unwanted children out of wedlock does cause much more harm. But these cases are in the minority hopefully. Majority of married couples with children fair quite well.
Some people love the idea. It is ideal to meet, fall in love, then plan a marriage.
If you really love and feel passionate about someone, you don’t think like that. You look forward to settling down with that person and spend your life with. It happens naturally if you are both mature enough to know what you want.
This is my opinion.
Through the years things change so two people should put equal amounts of effort into the relationship. I think this is why people separate.
Marriage literally makes me sick to my ■■■■■■■ stomach.
Disgusting.
I was just listening to this. I love this song so much. I should re-watch the movie.
I am romantic. Finding that perfect match is not possible but companionship is beautiful. Especially devotion.
On a different note. Mental illness shaped my life.
My family’s lack of responsibility shaped my life in the choices I made.
In a different circumstance, my life would be different. I have no regrets. I have a great life.
I decided not to have kids. I am not normal enough to start a family. It is not in me. I am a weirdo! 
