Wanted to make a post about this a week ago but I wanted to be level headed about it when I made it. Got in a huge fight with my sister last week. I sent her a text in which I was a lot more aggressive than I should have been. I highly doubt any of what I said actually got though to her because of that but at the same time I feel like what I said needed to be said. My sister is extremely aggressive with the people close to her. She emotionally abuses her husband. Her daughter (4 yo) told me that she screamed at him until he broke down into tears. I’ve seen hear throw tantrums where she’s broken her children’s toys, although I don’t think that happens all the time. She hasn’t spoken to my mom in a week because my mom was working and missed a phone call from her, apparently she was having a panic attack. My mom always picks up the phone while my sister screens probably 95% of the phone calls my makes to her. I took care of her kids for 4 hours the day before we got into this fight and when she dropped the kids off she took my car and left hers so I could drive the kids back if need be. I told her just put a couple bucks in the gas tank because I was gonna door dash that night and needed all the gas I could get. She ended up just driving back to my place and when she did she had this slimy smile on her face which confused me but later that night when I went to go work a quarter tank of gas was gone. My mom has something going on with her eyes, possibly an auto immune thing. It should responds to treatment but it’s absolutely possible my mom looses her sight. My sister hasn’t checked in on her once. I told her off for all these things and the argument got ugly. The thing is my sister is trying to get a small gym off the ground and has a huge presence on social media. It’s got me a little paranoid that she’s trashing me to the entire town. I know that’s paranoid and I know that even if she was doing that a lot of people are mature enough to know there are two sides to ever story. Still. I’m paranoid. The main thing though is her family. I feel bad for her husband. She treats the guy like farm equipment then tells him over and over that he’s not doing enough. The guy hasn’t had a day to himself in years at this point, mean while my sister will go on vacations with her friends and take days where she dumps her kids on me or my mom. I worry about the kids a lot too. She’s not a complete monster, she can be very sweet and definitely loves her kids but I worry that tantrums are gonna damage them. I also feel guilty. I should of been softer when I sent her the text. I’m just tired of her treating people the way she does. I’m pretty sure she’s chopping up the texts I sent her to my mental illness but I’m not sure about that. She’d have to be the least self aware person on earth to think nothing I said was true. Idk. Just wanted to get that off my chest.
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With all that going on, no wonder you were harsh! I’m sorry to hear about your mom’s eyes. If your sister is that out of control, she needs a wake up call.
I don’t know if you were too aggressive or not, but my opinion is to not apologize. Just let it be. Don’t contact her just to give her more a piece of your mind, but also, if she responds, don’t back down.
Just try from here on out to be assertive but not aggressive.
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Thanks @LilyoftheValley. She should be ok.
Very difficult line to ride for me but I here you.
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