Been feeling like this a lot recently. I keep seeing everyone I went to school with learning to drive and getting there first car, getting accepted into university and all these proud parents boasting about there child’s success and I’m doing nothing. Having my first psychotic episode at 15 I have missed out on my teenage years and being told I wouldn’t be able to attend school anymore at 15 because I’m too unwell to cope I’ve missed out on all they accomplishments and sitting exams. It’s a bit overwhelming at times seeing it all happen and none of them even remember me or haven’t been in contact in 2 years. Feel like I should have accomplished a lot more at 18. I was always looking forward to turning 18 and being able to go out and party like everyone else but I can’t do things that “normal” people my age can. Can anyone else relate to this feeling?
Yes, I can relate. My teenage years were rough to begin with, but around 17 I had a nervous breakdown and went into a major depressive episode for about 2 years.
I tore the cartilage in my knee at my first job, and was on crutches for 18 months while waiting for surgery. During that time, I watched all my friends move on making money, buying their first car, and being free to enjoy life
It sucked at the time, but I’m still here and doing fairly well now. Don’t throw in the towel on yourself
I won’t give up just yet just wonder what my life would be like if I never developed this illness. I hope one day I will be able to go to university but I will learn to be okay with it if I can’t do it.
You sound like you’re fairly clear-headed, and capable of dealing with what life might send. This in itself is quite an achievement, believe me
It’s probably harder for you at your age. At age 60, I’ve never been (or rarely) the type to compare myself to other people or their lives. There’s a billion people doing better than me and another billion people doing worse. I’m just happy I can come to my job and I’ve usually lived comfortably in nice surroundings. My sisters both used to make over a hundred grand a year at their jobs. I make about $13,000 if I’m lucky. We still get along and they don’t lord it over me and treat me pretty good. They know my situation and they’re proud of me and that’s what counts.
But yeah, it’s probably tough for you. I wouldn’t want to miss all that either. Schizophrenia makes you have to make special adjustments for sure. But you can help yourself by taking your medication and co operating with all the people trying to help you. Don’t even consider taking street drugs to cope. Drugs are a dead end and if you think life is hard now, well, doing drugs will make your life a hundred times worse. Just a word of warning.
You still can get something out of life even with schizophrenia. Some people are still going to like you. You might make a friend and have someone to talk to. Your life may be different than most but it’s a big world and as you get older and can make your own decisions you can choose where to live and even choose where you want to work. And choose the people you want to be around. You may have obstacles that other people don’t have but you may meet people who really like you and you can have fun with.
Wow I needed to head that thank you. I have taken drugs in the past when I was very young at 13 14 to cope with trauma but I would never go down that road again. This forum has helped a lot with feeling lonely at times. No matter how hard the people who love you try to understand what you are going through they will never be able to truly understand so it gets pretty lonely.
Seeing others pass you out always hurts.
But don’t fall into the trap of thinking that you’re falling behind in an equal race.
You have a disability. But you sound like you’ve got your illness under control to be honest, which is no mean feat.
You’re going to have to start measuring youself by something else other than what your friends are doing though.
I have got it under control at the moment. That’s one thing my psychiatrist says to me often is that I’m very good at hiding all the horrible stuff that’s going on up there. Think that’s because of lack of understanding where I live I don’t like the thought of people judging me for the way I am. There comes times where i can’t hide it anymore and blow.
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