Schizophrenia.com

Do Mothers like their sons more then their daughters?

#1

I was just pondering… do Fathers like their daughters more then their son’s?

During all this with my sis, my Dad has really been hit hard. Mom has been logical science. When John was falling apart last month Mom was really upset and trying to convince John that he needed help. But Dad is the one who took the hard line with the no non-sense and really got John into rehab.

When my sis tells my parents “no big… all is well”
Mom always seems fine with it, but Dad always thinks there’s something more. (That could be because he reads this site too.) I do tend to lean on her a lot. I’m going to have to stop doing that. For a while she was my ONLY connection to the world outside my head.

But I was afraid after this Mom and Dad would want Riley at their home. Mom said no, John was moving in so my sis should stay with me and keep helping me. Dad was thinking John should go to a half way house and my sis should live at their home. Mom gets her way on this, which is good for me and how I would have wanted it too. I am just really pondering how OK my parents have been NOT having my sister under their roof. It makes me wonder if they like her.

#2

I think once you get to raising the 4th child, some of the formalities and rules go out the window. As the youngest child in my family, my parents were a lot more lenient and free with me.

My parents didn’t want my oldest sister to go away for college at 18. But they let me quit high school early and move away for college at 16. They also let me start driving earlier than all my siblings.

They just had a very nonchalant attitude by the time I was a teen. I don’t think they loved me less. I just think they learned to be more open and free.

Maybe your parents feel the same way.

Blessings,

Anthony

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#3

I guess that Steve Martin Comic routine is sort of on the money… You bubble wrap the house and everything in it with your first kid but by the third or more, they are juggling knives walking across a hot stove and as long is nothing is burned or bleeding, all is well.

I’ve just really never seen my Dad so emotional. I have a lot of theories. All of us boy have had addiction and mental health problems. My sis is the first physical health problem (not related to drugs) in the family. I also think there might be SO much more then I’m being told, but that could just be good old paranoia.

#4

There was a psychologist who proposed a theory as to how children in birth orders often behave (ie the first born is always trying to achieve and be the best, middle children are trying to keep up with the first born) but I don’t know about mothers favoring male or female children. Maybe I will learn about that in my new social psychology class. I am also taking Roles and Deviance, so I bet I will have an answer in three months!

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#5

I’m the oldest and just wanted to surf. My first youngest brother is the “successful one” (middle management with a flash car and a failing marriage and a huge house and mortgage.) My third and fourth are just sort of drifting philosophers and artist. It’s my sis (the youngest) that wants to take on the world and be a nurse and change humanity and cure me, and cure her friends, and end addiction… on and on. She’s the go getter.

I look forward to your results in thee months… I would love to know more about this.

#6

Yes your parents like your sister. Love her even. I’m thinking that your mother recognizes in your sister some of her own strengths and therefore doesn’t worry about the same things as your father would worry about. I don’t think we love our children any more or less but I do think that we can love them in different ways. There are things that my daughter can handle but not my son and vice versa. You and kid sis can handle this. Sometimes it’s not easy trying to decide which child gets or needs the most support giving the current circumstances. I do think that mom’s want to baby their boys and dad’s want to baby their girls. It’s not uncommon but it doesn’t mean that they love their other children any less. Based on what I do know of your parent’s so far, I have faith that if they thought it was needed they would be their in a heart beat for each one of you.

#7

She sounds like the typical youngest child who has room less competition but more ground to cover to catch up. Your brother whos got the big house and wife and fancy car sounds like the typical second-born, trying to outdo himself and outdo the other siblings.

I am the second of two, so I kind of had to be “as successful” if not more so than my sister…I do well in school and I am the only fit person in my immediate family. I am by far the most driven and disciplined, I was like that growing up, I didn’t need people to tell me what to do, I had everything taken care of by the time they did. Even when I was spending my time recovering from a testicle infection and smoking pot to dull the pain from it, I made above a 3.0 in honors classes and graduated with multiple honors from a prestigious high school. I was failing honors psychics but somehow, while smoking pot almost every night, I brought my grade up to a C pretty quickly and passed without completely ruining my GPA. I wanted to join the military so I always got stuff done without messing around and never procrastinated. If I got a bad grade, it was because I tried and failed, not because I didn’t try…

But she sounds like she has strong defense mechanisms and is very driven. Be happy for her, she’s awesome!

My sis, on the other hand, wont take mood stabilizers for her bipolar II and is irritable and obnoxious. She complains about work but completes it. I usually just sit down and get ■■■■ done, I do it now and I do it right the first time. That’s how it works in the military, do it, do it now, do it right and you wont get yelled at and punished.