I took my baby sister out to go fishing today, since my mom and stepdad were ‘too tired’ to take her, despite neither of them working right now.
She asked me why our mother hates me now…And I didn’t know how to phrase the answer in a way that wouldn’t scar her 10 year old heart…
When I told her I didn’t know how to answer she then asked me why its bad for me to have a girlfriend my middle brother has three…Again no idea how to answer without sounding bitter…
And finally when she realized I couldn’t answer that she asked me if I would leave forever because of the way the rest of my family was treating me…That one I had an answer for!
“As long as you are around, I wont leave. As long as you don’t hate me, I will never want to leave.”
A little depressing that she has to ask these questions, because of all the things she has overheard from my parents… She told me that my mom asked her to ‘check his wallet and take any money he has’ before I got there. My baby sis is too honest for that. And my step dad told her to check my bedroom for ‘little square foils with a circle in them’ and take all of them.
I am depressed that my baby sis is afraid I will leave, and furious that my parents are dragging her into this in such a way.
Wow that really sucks. You can talk to your parents about it - it won’t necessarily help but if you’re honest and respectful and tell them how you feel and what they are doing thats clearly messed up it may hit them deeply and make them reconsider whatever they’re doing.
I recently finally mustered up the courage to talk to my dad about his yelling at my younger 13 year old sister and how it may affect her mental health negatively. He yelled at me quite a lot as a child so that’s why it took courage. I was surprised how well he took it and it brought us closer.
Why are your step parents going through your stuff and acting that way if you don’t mind me asking?
I was wondering this too. Why can’t you have a girlfriend either?
Your family is a piece of work, damn! Glad your baby sis isn’t influenced by them and goes along with their agendas.
1 Like
My mom and Stepdad, I’m not wholly sure what their problem is, but I think it has to do with my SZ and how it will ruin their perfect plan for retirement. My mom, when she researched SZ, only looked at the articles that talk about the most severe cases, even though my case is only moderately severe, its bad but not the worst case scenario, and even with how bad my case is, my new meds have made me feel almost normal again.
My stepdad wanting my condoms? I really don’t know, maybe he thinks I wont have sex if I don’t have any?
And my mom has been hiding money for a while now. No idea what her plan is, but I gave her the money to pay her car payment, and she claimed I never gave it to her, so now I make the payments to the dealer directly.
According to my sister, my mom does nothing but complain about how my illness is ruining everything. All her great plans are ruined because I was diagnosed with SZ. My stepdad, who grew up hard core Republican Conservative, believes my illness is fake and just an excuse for me to be lazy, even though ive made more money with actual work in the 5 years I actually worked, than he made in the first 15 years of his working life. I was making over 50K a year when I was 18-20, and I was a fulltime student at the time.
I think it has more to dow with my parents having thought that when they got old I would be the one taking care of them, and between their very wrong ideas about my illness they think I will never be able to if I live my life the way I am…you know happy, with a girlfriend and good paying job, with plans to start college courses in the fall…They want me to either go to ‘home’ or focus my attention on ‘providing for the future’…you know, THEIR future, not mine.
You have no obligation to provide for them because you do well in life, you know that right? What pushes you to do it?
Its got a lot to do with my Grandfather, who taught me three rules to life.
Love ONE Woman
Love your Family
Help those who cannot help Themselves.
My mom may be a rotten person, but she is pretty helpless, she suffers her own mental illness, but refuses to get diagnosed (pretty sure its Bi Polar). She hasn’t worked in months because she keeps having break downs, so she is trying to get short term disability for ‘stress’. My stepdad is an ■■■■■■■, but he hurt his back while working and can barely walk.
So they fall into two of the categories…
That and if I don’t pay for things for them, its my little sibs who lose out. My baby sis almost didn’t have a 10th birthday party last Oct. My mom didn’t even buy a cake or any presents. I had to do it a week later, and tell her we waited so it would be a surprise.
My 14 year old brother wanted to be in the band at school all my mom had to do was sign a piece of paper and he would be given an instrument because of the financial situation of the household, she didn’t, so I had to buy him a trumpet.
She doesn’t let them go hungry, she doesn’t make them walk around in filthy clothes, but she doesn’t really do much more than the basic. My step dad’s approach to parenting is to yell at them that they are doing something ‘stupid’ then say ‘I told you so’ when they get hurt, without even getting of the couch. Which he did with me, like the time I broke my leg getting the cat out of the tree, he sat on the porch and said ‘I told ya’ while I cried with a bone sticking out of my ankle.
Of course back then my mom ‘well’ and came home from work to take me to the ER when the neighbors called her. Back then she treated me like her son, these days she treats me like some people treat their drunk uncle or cousin who is all talk, no game.
Reading through that Turnip, I don’t think my mom or stepdad are NPD sufferers, they have some of the qualities but not enough to make think this is the case.
They certainly both have a degree of Narcissism, but not to the point they become abusive like that. I think its more, they don’t know how to cope with my mental illness, and since I am open about my illness, and my brothers are not with theirs, it makes it so they cannot deny it as easily.
Now my 19 year old brother is a classic NPD, he doesn’t have kids, but he is definitely the ‘I cant live without you’ type. Its why he has so many girlfriends who, even after he cheats on them, will come back to him after a few weeks…speaking of the Girl he cheated most recently is already back with him because he told her that her sister ‘seduced’ him…so now she treats her little sis like dirt…