Seems like theres A cycle with my mood.
It’s like, the 14 hours it’s dark I am depressed. And the ten hours it’s light I’m happy. And there’s a cycle. I go to bed and wake up unhappy. But by the time I’m up drinking coffee I’m in a good mood. And it lasts till 4 pm when it gets dark. Then I go to bed early because bad mood. And wake up. Repeat.
I’m gonna go back to the mental health clubhouse soon
Good for you 
Maybe you’ll get better with no depression
For me I do cycle through moods and symptoms but for me it’s about years. I had major breaks 5 years apart before the meds. I’ve been ok since the meds…I do take a lot of antidepressant in the mornings and antipsychotic at night. It evens me out quite well but that depression is always there for me.
Sometimes if I’m a bit tired or low I feel it’s just there around the corner and I’m forever watchful about my mood!
Could be worth checking in with your doc!
I think it has to do with light. We just raised the Zoloft not long ago and it helped but now it’s still an issue.
Everyone told me to get a lamp for the winter and I didn’t get it but now I think it’d be super helpful because every winter I get like this because summertime come 5 pm I’m hiking still. In the winter I’m inside in the dark night at that time.
Mate…sounds reasonable. I’m in the semi tropics so the sun here has some bite even in winter. I do a lot of walking and volunteer a couple of days a week out mowing ovals. I get too much sunlight but I’d imagine in a cold climate that is an issue.
I’ve seen people mention those lamps. Very curious for someone like me! I’d say go for it and give it a go. You have nothing to lose and gain is good!
Every night I get wrapped in the SAME thoughts. It’s like , resent 2-3 people from my past, my life has no purpose, I’m going nowhere and I hate where I am!!
Well the lamp may help a bit but I also feel I need to discover the core of those thoughts which is that I don’t have enough purpose in my life I feel.
Maybe a lamp, AND some volunteer work would do me fine.
Well the clubhouse is a volunteer program. I also like this place it’s a nature center and the people there are real nice to me. Maybe it’s ne a good place to volunteer too. !
Yes and excersize dyude you need to do it man
Normally I just walk a lot. Even if just pacing around my apartment. I go 4 miles a day on average. I also lost 7 pounds since lowering my abilify dosage. Which I don’t think is the issue. Too much abilify only makes me more unhappy.
@anon97118089 why you being beotchy?
Exercise is great. Do it you be less sad and more motivated. Too old to care so don’t get personal. Take it private if you have a problem with me!
I think he was talking to me and meant nothing bad!!
Yea man i dont know what u on about
sorry i dont know why i quoted that word.
I wasnt even talking to u man !
The one thing that makes me most depressed is thinking I should have a CAREER in my music. I’m happy to make my music but f that. That wasn’t my decision to pursue music. It was external factors/delusions. It’s a good outlet but I never wanted to be musical really. It was just delusion. I’ve gotten better but still hate the idea of professional musician. I care and always have, always will, more about love and family than money, success, fame, power, stupid ■■■■.
@Jonnybegood I love your rap but you shouldn’t let other people pressure you to make it more than what you want it to be. If it’s for fun than that’s that.
And I have the light aspect to my moods too, the full spectrum bulb is helping a little. You can get them cheap at amazon.com and you don’t need a fancy tamp. I got mine for under 10 dollars from the seller bulbs.com I think and I got it in a couple days. I just flip it on for 20 minutes here and there while I’m at the computer and it lifts my mood a little.
Have you thought of breaking your days into hours with projects to accommplish? I keep myself busy to the point my dark and light aren’t differential. I make my own light also by spending time “being a mom to my dogs, or more like smotherin (hehe)”. I focus on their love and our bond…I bet Don Juan would like more attention 
Thanks that helps a lot 
I mean it’s a complicated situation but I was in Iop in 2012 and had just been rejected again and these delusions popped up and everyone there was influencing me and it’s not what I really wanted I just felt really dejected in life. But now I’ve practiced better acceptance and patience and have clearer ideas and state of mind it’s not what I want, not what I need, not meant to be. Although I do enjoy it. On an amateur level.
I think don Juan just wants more FOOD
Awww, cmon a tummy scratch? Hmm, my dogs get mani/pedis, bath time in the jacuzzi tub, walks, etc 
Cats are less dependent than dogs are. I play with him a lot. He loves me and I love him.
Dude same thing with me, think I posted something about this before, well for me it may be a little more than mood - symptoms too.
Mornings I wake up feel somewhat shitty, then I drink a energy drink and begin my day, and I’m happy like for some stupid ■■■■■■■ reason I well kinda get a little get away from when I wake up to like 5pm
until like 6pm when it starts to get dark
Well that’s when all the symptoms come back nighttime, the whole scope, terrible symptoms and my nightmare begins until finally I somehow manage to go to sleep at like 5am ,
Idk why maybe like our minds are just weak to it all from this continuous illness and like a battery we only last 5-8hrs max idfk