That’s great and im sure she deserves it.
Mine is kind of reverse: she was firstly pretty supportive and caring but now she is opposite. I can’t but to think she is disappointed in me.
It’s probably your rebellious nature, really. Not sure about the disappointment, they just don’t know how to deal.
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Different for you because of your son and that he may want to meet his grandmother n be close with her.
My mum (one I grew up with) might of had good morals but then as adult teased me im a goodi goodi n made me jaywalk.
I see at the other ones n her mum lets her do what ever she wants n encourages her to be awful, constantly lying n stealing n cheating ,bullying n etc n no shame in her.
Thank god im not like that.
N that’s a “privileged” people…
But jealous .
N obsessed with me it seems.n in negative way.
At one point my mum was driving two hours to work n two hours back at night and she was alone with me.
She probably had it rough too.
Glad she seems well n happy now.
But sometimes talking to someone doesn’t help.
Maybe you can tell her n show that you are angry hurt disappointed how she treats you and would like it to change.
Being civil around your son still so he is not affected so much by your fighting .
Hope you will find way to live in peace with each other God willing or accept them but not meaning one wants accept the behaviour .
Toxic parents is a good book you can buy it on amazon,
There’s a line in Little Lion Man by Mumford & Sons
“Now learn from your mother or else spend your days biting your own neck.”
I always see it as learn from how she totally screwed things up and don’t do anything like it.
I also have some memory you’re a parent yourself is that right? Motherhood isn’t called the toughest job in the world for nothing as you know. Wish that offered some solace. Therapies all I know that’s helping me with issues with mine. The one thing that keeps me going in therapy is the skill are transferable one they make you a better parent. No way in hell am I letting any of her parenting get anywhere near my kids.
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That is a very good advice, thank you.
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When she gives unwanted advice and treats you as a child it’s tricky to remain adult yourself and not get hooked into your resentful and rebellious child self. You might check into the granddaddy of self-help books, “I’m OK, You’re OK.” I lived with my parents for several years and it eventually was possible for us all to treat each other as adults. That book helped me to do it. It’s a long learning process though.
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I had to do as @Ninjastar did and cut my mom out of my life for a few months. Now is a trial period of letting her back in. When she is starting to be toxic. I shut her down and tell her she is being mean or needs to leave. She has been behaving much better as she knows I will pull away when I don’t like something she says or does now.
At first it ate me up. I grieved for months at the loss of my mom. But it got better as I realized that I was better off without her toxicity in my life, she just brought me down every time I saw her. I was like a deflated balloon after every confrontation with her for days until I recovered only to see her again.
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@sarad, Wow, that really doesn’t sound like fun. I used to have a friend like this. Then she tried to force me to buy a stolen truck off her husband. Needless to say, we don’t talk much, anymore.
My mother and I never used to get along much, growing up. She was a little over the top controlling, and even occasionally physical with me. I ran away, when I was 17, and that’s when ■■■■ really hit the fan…
Well, fast-forward about five years, and now we have a relationship, again. It’s not always the best, but we make it work.
I think it has to do with my other siblings and all their crazy stunts they’ve been pulling. Suddenly, my odd behaviourisms and having tattoos isn’t the worst thing in the world. It’s nice not to be the devil child, for once.
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@skims i think im doing the same now, its been a week since i dont talk to her ( she isnt showing a will either) and I will remain cold and distant next time if we meet in person.
I just have this slight fear that I’m doing wrong and I remember that I didn’t speak to my father for a month and then he died - it took a lot of time and tears for me to overcome it…
Anyways I think our relationship is only going to get worse, since she won’t change and I’m what I am…we can only live in basically sterile environment so to say.
It hurts though.
@butterflybrains yes I’m also an evil child. I can relate to a lot of what you said. Also I think a part of the problem is that my mother just won’t take the fact that i have progressively gotten worse and some things are irreparable, I am what I am now, accept me for once! That’s all I want her to understand.
Sorry about your dad, that must be tough.
And I wish I could help you, I know how you feel about being misunderstood.
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Thank you 
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