Iāve struggled with binging and restricting.
I have an eating disorder in that I have a restrictive food diet because of texture, taste, and smell problems that results in a lot of anxiety around food and mealtimes.
Self-destructive behavior. Have you ever seen someone die because their bodies have eaten their organs. My psychiatrist had me go to hospitals and outpatient places after recovery and Iāve seen some sick ā ā ā ā . I didnāt have my period for 15 years and canāt have kidsā¦plus not. Healthy enough, but there was a girl trying to convince the clinic that she had to have an abortion because she didnāt want to get fat. They told her she was a risk because she was so thin, and she died. She was 15.
Of course itās like a drugā¦it releases endorphins when you binge and purge. Exercise does the same thing happy endorphins. Would you rather have acid burn your teeth enamel away and throw up your stomach lining. Or have sore feet?
Ok, hereās where Iām at. Honestly, I have completely turned off my food/huger switch. Mentally I never want to eat. I almost died! Iāve seen someone die from occasional bulimia die while holding my hand. I saw the light that used to be bright and happy fizzle away into a cold hand. Do you have any clue what it does to a person with my anxiety level to have someoneās lips turn blue and hand become ice. I ā ā ā ā ā ā ā wish it was sz but it was to wake me up and never do anything self-destructive again. Fear drives me, I have forced myself 3 times a week to eat an avocado cuz itās good for me and I ā ā ā ā ā ā ā hate them. I may be mentally ill, but nobody is taking me out of this life without a fight. I will always have stray dogs that need homes. I wonāt be self-righteous just to let my mental illness win. Yes, eating disorders want to kill you. That is their design. I am 125 and donāt owna scale. Cuz scales are for fish
Thats good that you are doing something about this. Sorry about your lack of appetiteā¦we are at opposite ends. My hunger switch is on more than off.
No I donāt but sorry you had to go through this, especially if you were close. 
I trained myself to shut it offā¦thatās how ā ā ā ā ā ā up i was
My voices told me to eat and I trained themā¦I manipulated them like they manipulated me. When I get stressed my sz tends to peek its ugly head. They yell at me that Iām a fat bitch or should kill myselfā¦so I might come home and do intervals for 30 minutes all hooked up to heart ā ā ā ā ā¦and blast music and mentally tell myself that Iāll go as hard and as fast as I can til I āsweatā them out. My night terrors allow me 4 hours of sleep a nightā¦I donāt have the patience to allow them to control my day. I fight as if it life or death. Mental illnesses arenāt gamesā¦theyāre like cancerā¦they kill.
Thank God u can exercise whilst on APs.
Itās how you treat your body that gives drs trust in you
and my CPN repeatedly says co operation is what happened with all those that are doing better now
Give and take 131313131
i have bulimia. i go through periods of doing well and doing really bad.
Iāve been struggling, since I was a child, with food restriction and bulimia.
Iāve never been officially diagnosed and it comes in cycles.
The relapses are becoming much longer, and worse, though. Iām afraid it will be permanent.
I was bulimic from the ages of 13 to about 21. Iām not sure why i stopped, I think it just became too hard to keep it a secret.
Wowā¦Iām speechless
It may seem obviousā¦ But it wasnāt at first to me I was going to halve my dose etc without my cpn knowing but luckily I did not do that in the end.
Do you see a psychiatrist or a cpn or both